Daily Recovery Readings
July 15, 2025

Daily Reflection

PRIDE

For thousands of years we have been demanding more than our share of security, prestige, and romance. When we seemed to be succeeding, we drank to dream still greater dreams. When we were frustrated, even in part, we drank for oblivion. Never was there enough of what we thought we wanted.

In all these strivings, so many of them well-intentioned, our crippling handicap had been our lack of humility. We had lacked the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values had to come first, and that material satisfactions were not the purpose of living.’

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 71

Time and again I approached the Seventh Step, only to fall back and regroup. Something was missing and the impact of the Step escaped me. What had I overlooked? A single word: read but ignored, the foundation of all the Steps, indeed the entire Alcoholics Anonymous program – that word is “humbly.”

I understood my shortcomings: I constantly put tasks off; I angered easily; I felt too much self-pity; and I thought, why me? Then I remembered, “Pride goeth before the fall,” and I eliminated pride from my life.

Big Book Quote

“Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 14~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

After we had sobered up through the A.A. program, we gradually began to get a peace of mind and serenity, which we never thought were possible. This peace of mind is based on a feeling that fundamentally all is well. That does not mean that all is well on the surface of things. Little things can keep going wrong and big things can keep on upsetting us. But deep down in our hearts we know that everything is eventually going to be all right, now that we are living sober lives. Have I achieved a deep down, inner calm?

Meditation for the Day

You are climbing up the ladder of life, which reaches into eternity. Would God plant your feet upon an insecure ladder? Its supports may be out of sight, hidden in secret places, but if God has asked you to step on and up firmly, then surely He has secured your ladder. Faith gives you the strength to climb steadily this ladder of life. You should leave your security to God and trust Him not to let you fall. He is there to give you all the power you need to keep on climbing.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may climb the ladder of life without fear. I pray that I may progress steadily through the rest of my life with faith and confidence.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

I was thirty five years old the first time I spoke up to my mother and refused to buy into her games and manipulation.

I was terribly frightened and almost couldn’t believe I was doing this. I found I didn’t have to be mean. I didn’t have to start an argument. But I could say what I wanted and needed to say to take care of myself. I learned I could love and honor myself, and still care about my mother – the way I wanted to – not the way she wanted me to.

—Anonymous

Who knows better how to push our buttons than family members? Who, besides family members, do we give such power?

No matter how long we or our family members have been recovering, relationships with family members can be provocative.

One telephone conversation can put us in an emotional and psychological tailspin that lasts for hours or days.

Sometimes, it gets worse when we begin recovery because we become even more aware of our reactions and our discomfort. That’s uncomfortable, but good. It is by beginning this process of awareness and acceptance that we change, grow, and heal.

The process of detaching in love from family members can take years. So can the process of learning how to react in a more effective way. We cannot control what they do or try to do, but we can gain some sense of control over how we choose to react.

Stop trying to make them act or treat us any differently. Unhook from their system by refusing to try to change or influence them.

Their patterns, particularly their patterns with us, are their issues. How we react, or allow these patterns to influence us, is our issue. How we take care of ourselves is our issue.

We can love our family and still refuse to buy into their issues. We can love our family but refuse their efforts to manipulate, control, or produce guilt in us.

We can take care of ourselves with family members without feeling guilty. We can learn to be assertive with family members without being aggressive. We can set the boundaries we need and want to set with family members without being disloyal to the family.

We can learn to love our family without forfeiting love and respect for ourselves.

Today, help me start practicing self care with family members. Help me know that I do not have to allow their issues to control my life, my day, or my feelings. Help me know it’s okay to have all my feelings about family members, without guilt or shame.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

There is nothing you can say in answer to a compliment. I have been complimented myself a great many times, and they always embarrass me – I always feel that they have not said enough.

—Mark Twain

Hearing the good words and praise of another person is harder for some of us to accept than criticism and abuse. Perhaps it is easier to receive what we are accustomed to, or maybe we feel a loss of control when someone compliments us. This is a time for us to begin accepting others’ actions. We do not need to be in control of our relationships at all times. When friends offer sincere compliments, we don’t need to push them away or brush them off.

All we need to do is allow others’ positive messages to come into us. In a good relationship we listen to the feelings of our friends, and sometimes that means truly listening as they tell us their good feelings about us.

Today, I will be open to the compliments that come my way without controlling them.

Elder’s Meditation

“We are nothing compared to His power, and we feel and know it.”

–Black Hawk, SAUK

Inside of every man and woman is a place of knowing. In this place is the knowing that there is a Great One, the Great Mystery, the Holy One, the Great Spirit. We can deny this all we want but we know what we know. This place of knowing is at the very center of our being. It is gratifying to know that God cannot leave us. It is said we are spiritual beings trying to be human. With this power in our lives, we can accomplish much. We can do many good things for our people.

Oh Great Spirit, I know of Your power. I love the days when I can feel Your presence. Let today be one of those days. Let me walk today in Your beauty.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Words might mean a little extra today. What people say (and the way that they say it) may be more important to you than usual, as you could be painfully reactive to criticism or teasing. If you are feeling abnormally sensitive, it may be a good idea to let others know that you’re not feeling like yourself today. They might be more willing than you’d expect to provide you with the support that you need — you just have to speak up for it.

Daily Recovery Readings
July 14, 2025

Daily Reflection

A NOURISHING INGREDIENT

Where humility had formerly stood for a forced feeding on humble pie, it now begins to mean the nourishing ingredient which can give us serenity.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 74

How often do I focus on my problems and frustrations? When I am having a “good day” these same problems shrink in importance and my preoccupation with them dwindles. Wouldn’t it be better if I could find a key to unlock the “magic” of my “good days” for use on the woes of my “bad days?”

I already have the solution! Instead of trying to run away from my pain and wish my problems away, I can pray for humility! Humility will heal the pain. Humility will take me out of myself. Humility, that strength granted to me by that “power greater than myself,” is mine for the asking! Humility will bring balance back into my life. Humility will allow me to accept my humanness joyously.

Big Book Quote

“The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself. As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. It thickened, ever becoming blacker. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval. Momentarily we did, then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen, Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, A Vision For You, pg. 151~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

One of the best things about the A.A. program is the peace of mind and serenity that it can bring us. In our drinking days, we had no peace of mind or serenity. We had the exact opposite, a kind of turmoil and that “quiet desperation” we knew so well. The turmoil of our drinking days was caused partly by our physical suffering, the terrible hangovers, the cold sweats, the shakes and the jitters. But it was caused even more by our mental suffering, the loneliness, the feeling of inferiority, the lying, and the remorse that every alcoholic understands. Have I achieved more peace of mind?

Meditation for the Day

Try to look for God’s leading in all your personal relationships, in all your dealings with other persons. God will help you to take care of all your relationships with people, if you are willing to let Him guide you. Rejoice that God can protect you and keep you from temptation and failure. God can protect you in all situations during the day, if you will rely on His strength and go forward. You should feel that you are entering upon the stage of success in the proper way of living. You should not doubt that better things are ahead for you. Go forward unafraid because you feel deeply safe under God’s protection.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that God may protect and keep me as long as I try to serve Him. I pray that I may go forward today unafraid.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

We Are Lovable

Even if the most important person in your world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay.

—Codependent No More

Do you ever find yourself thinking: How could anyone possibly love me? For many of us, this is a deeply ingrained belief that can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Thinking we are unlovable can sabotage our relationships with co-workers, friends, family members, and other loved ones. This belief can cause us to choose, or stay in, relationships that are less than we deserve because we don’t believe we deserve better. We may become desperate and cling as if a particular person was our last chance at love. We may become defensive and push people away. We may withdraw or constantly overreact.

While growing up, many of us did not receive the unconditional love we deserved. Many of us were abandoned or neglected by important people in our life. We may have concluded that the reason we weren’t loved was because we were unlovable. Blaming ourselves is an understandable reaction, but an inappropriate one. If others couldn’t love us, or love us in ways that worked, that’s not our fault. In recovery, we’re learning to separate ourselves from the behavior of others. And we’re learning to take responsibility for our healing, regardless of the people around us.

Just as we may have believed that we’re unlovable, we can become skilled at practicing the belief that we are lovable. This new belief will improve the quality of our relationships. It will improve our most important relationship: our relationship with our self. We will be able to let others love us and become open to the love and friendship we deserve.

Today, God, help me be aware of and release any self-defeating beliefs I have about being unlovable. Help me begin, today, to tell myself that I am lovable. Help me practice this belief until it gets into my core and manifests itself in my relationships.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Life is not a “brief candle.” It is a splendid torch that I want to make burn as brightly as possible before handing on to future generations.

—George Bernard Shaw

We are men who have sought intensity. Some have said the extremes of our past were a kind of search for a Higher Power, although we went to self-defeating ends. There is no need now for us to give up our intense love of life. Serenity need not be bland. In facing ourselves, confronting our pain, surrendering our arrogant individualism, we are released to live the life we deeply desire.

What do men really want? We want to have true, lasting friendships with other men and women – to be at peace with our Higher Power and ourselves. We want to be fully aware in the present moments of our lives. We want to have some joy and to make a contribution to the world.

I am grateful that my torch burns brightly. I am finding what I really want.

Elder’s Meditation

“It was good for the skin to touch the earth, and the old people liked to remove their moccasins and walk with bare feet on the sacred earth… The soil was soothing, strengthening, cleansing, and healing.”

–Chief Luther Standing Bear, TETON SIOUX

Touching the earth – getting grounded, centered. There is magic in touching the earth and feeling her healing power. This is especially healthy to do during a troubling time when our minds are racing or can’t stop thinking or are locked onto fear or resentment. When I need to feel free I can go to the Mother Earth. The Mother Earth is full of life and love. She always gives her powers to those who come to her. The Mother Earth is alive.

Today, my Great Spirit, let me remember to touch the earth. Let me slow down and live just for today. Let me be gentle, patient and kind.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Be your own lucky charm! Don’t think that you have to wait for an opportunity to come along or for your luck to change — being rescued can be fun, but standing up for yourself offers true satisfaction. Go ahead and start a solo project that speaks to you. Once you have something laid out, get eyes on it in order to make the progress that you want to see. Hiding yourself away or playing small is not going to cut it right now.

Daily Recovery Readings
July 13, 2025

Daily Reflection

HUMILITY IS A GIFT

As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God’s will, was missing.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 72

When I first came to A.A., I wanted to find some of the elusive quality called humility. I didn’t realize I was looking for humility because I thought it would help me get what I wanted, and that I would do anything for others if I thought God would somehow reward me for it. I try to remember now that the people I meet in the course of my day are as close to God as I am ever going to get while on this earth. I need to pray for knowledge of God’s will today, and see how my experience with hope and pain can help other people; if I can do that, I don’t need to search for humility, it has found me.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Everybody knows that those in bad health, and those who seldom play, do not laugh much. So let each family play together or separately as much as their circumstances warrant. We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 132~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Before alcoholics come into A.A., they are “flying blind.” But A.A. gives them a directed beam in the A.A. program. As long as they keep on this beam, the signal of sobriety keeps coming through. If they have a slip, the signal is broken. If they swing off course into drunkenness, the signal stops. Unless they regain the A.A. directed beam, they are in danger of crashing against the mountain peak of despair. Am I on the beam?

Meditation for the Day

Be expectant. Constantly expect better things. Believe that what God has in store for you is better than anything you ever had before. The way to grow old happily is to expect better things right up to the end of your life and even beyond that. A good life is a growing, expanding life, with ever-widening horizons, an ever-greater circle of friends and acquaintances, and an ever-greater opportunity for usefulness.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may await with complete faith for the next good thing in store for me. I pray that I may always keep an expectant attitude toward life.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

God as We Understand God

God is subtle, but he is not malicious.

—Albert Einstein

Recovery is an intensely spiritual process that asks us to grow in our understanding of God. Our understanding may have been shaped by early religious experiences or the beliefs of those around us. We may wonder if God is as shaming and frightening as people can be. We may feel as victimized or abandoned by God as we have by people from our past.

Trying to understand God may boggle our mind because of what we have learned and experienced so far in our life.

We can learn to trust God, anyway.

I have grown and changed in my understanding of this Power greater than myself. My understanding has not grown on an intellectual level, but because of what I have experienced since I turned my life and my will over to the care of God, as I understood, or rather didn’t understand, God.

God is real. Loving. Good. Caring. God wants to give us all the good we can handle. The more we turn our mind and heart toward a positive understanding of God, the more God validates us.

The more we thank God for who God is, who we are, and the exact nature of our present circumstances, the more God acts in our behalf.

In fact, all along, God planned to act in our behalf.

God is Creator, Benefactor, and Source. God has shown me, beyond all else, that how I come to understand God is not nearly as important as knowing that God understand me.

Today, I will be open to growing in my understanding of my Higher Power. I will be open to letting go of old, limiting, and negative beliefs about God. No matter how I understand God, I will be grateful that God understands me.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

If I were to begin life again, I should want it as it was. I would only open my eyes a little more.

—Jules Renard

Spiritual and emotional growth is a process of raising our awareness. Reflecting on our growth as men, before this program and after, we see different levels of consciousness. Some of us might say we weren’t at all conscious of what it meant to be a man by the time we entered the adult world.

Now we are forming an awareness of manhood. We see ourselves more as recovering, caring, strong, vulnerable men in relationships with others. We have an increased sense that our actions make a difference as sons, as fathers, as husbands, lovers, and friends. Our increased understanding of ourselves makes it possible to fulfill our potentials for growth. It is not idle fantasy to imagine beginning life again because, in a sense, we have. In recovery, it seems we have begun life again, only with our eyes a little more open.

Help me live this day with all of my awareness.

Elder’s Meditation

“Grandfather, Great Spirit, once more behold me on earth and lean to hear my feeble voice. You lived first, and You are older than all need, older than all prayer…You are the life of all things.”

–Black Elk, OGLALA SIOUX

Great Spirit – Sometimes I don’t feel like praying. Sometimes when I have done something wrong, I’m ashamed to come to You. Even though You have always been there for me, I sometimes choose to stay away. It’s hard for me to understand what all knowing is. Sometimes it’s hard for me to see how much You really care. But I know if I take a few minutes and think about what I know to be true about You, the things change and I am able to realize Your power and Your love. Today, I’ll start by thinking of You. I’ll think about all the times You have helped and guided me in the past. You are life, You are love, You are power, You are desire, You are truth, You are principle, You are intelligence, You are courage. With You I am everything; without You I am nothing.

Creator, thank You for allowing me to start my day with You.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You don’t have to reach the apex right away. It may feel like you’re very behind, whether that’s due to the successes of others or a personal lack of visible progress, but worry not. Your triumph is coming, but it could be delayed by a lack of consistency or motivation. Take time to ponder and refamiliarize yourself with your present purpose outside of winning, because without that, you might find that there is no gas in your tank. What’s driving you forward?

Daily Recovery Readings
July 12, 2025

Daily Reflection

GIVING UP CENTER STAGE

For without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all. . . . Without it, they cannot live to much useful purpose, or, in adversity, be able to summon the faith that can meet any emergency.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 70

Why do I balk at the word “humility”? I am not humbling myself toward other people, but toward God, as I understand Him. Humility means “to show submissive respect,” and by being humble I realize I am not the center of the universe. When I was drinking, I was consumed by pride and self-centeredness. I felt the entire world revolved around me, that I was master of my destiny. Humility enables me to depend more on God to help me overcome obstacles, to help me with my own imperfections, so that I may grow spiritually. I must solve more difficult problems to increase my proficiency and, as I encounter life’s stumbling blocks, I must learn to overcome them through God’s help. Daily communion with God demonstrates my humility and provides me with the realization that an entity more powerful than I is willing to help me if I cease trying to play God myself.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied part of the time. But in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. Once this malady has a real hold, they are a baffled lot. There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game. But they often suspect they are down for the count.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 23~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Today is ours. Let us live today, as we believe God wants us to live. Each day will have a new pattern, which we cannot foresee. But we can open each day with a quiet period in which we say a little prayer, asking God to help us through the day. Personal contact with God, as we understand Him, will from day to day bring us nearer to an understanding of His will for us. At the close of the day, we offer Him thanks for another day of sobriety. A full, constructive day has been lived and we are grateful. Am I asking God each day for strength and thanking Him each night?

Meditation for the Day

If you believe that God’s grace has saved you, then you must believe that He is meaning to save you yet more and to keep you in the way that you should go. Even a human rescuer would not save you from drowning only to place you in other deep and dangerous waters. Rather, he would place you on dry land, there to restore you. God, who is your rescuer, would certainly do this and even more. God will complete the task He sets out to do. He will not throw you overboard, if you are depending on Him.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may trust God to keep me in the way. I pray that I may rely on Him not to let me go.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Letting Go of Fear of Abandonment

“Where are you, God? Where did you go?”

So many people have gone away. We may have felt so alone so much. In the midst of our struggles and lessons, we may wonder if God has gone away too.

There are wondrous days when we feel God’s protection and presence, leading and guiding each step and event. There are gray, dry days of spiritual barrenness when we wonder if anything in our life is guided or planned. Wondering if God knows or cares.

Seek quiet times on the gray days. Force discipline and obedience until the answer comes, because it will.

“I have not gone away child. I am here, always. Rest in me, in confidence. All in your life is being guided and planned, each detail. I know, and I care. Things are being worked out as quickly as possible for your highest good. Trust and be grateful. I am right here. Soon you will see, and know.”

Today, I will remember that God has not abandoned me. I can trust that God is leading, guiding, directing, and planning in love each detail of my life.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

If you keep on saying things are going to be bad, you have a good chance of being a prophet.

—Isaac Bashevis Singer

Many of us have the habit of taking a negative outlook on whatever comes along. We don’t believe things will work out for us; we don’t think we will have a good day; we can’t accept our friends’ warm feelings. To follow this gloomy path is a strange distortion of faith – it is faith in the negative. Any forecast, whether hopeful or pessimistic, is a step into the unknown. So why do we choose the dark one?

We get a payoff for our pessimism, which keeps us hooked. It creates misery, but serves our demand for control. There is more risk in being open to something positive because we cannot force positive things to occur. We can only be open to them and believe in the possibility. But when we predict the negative and expect only bad things, we squelch many good things or overlook them. Then we say, “I knew it would be this way,” and in our misery we satisfy our self-centered craving to be in charge. When we surrender our need to be in control, we are more open and welcoming of the good things that come our way.

Today. I will be open to the good that is around me.

Elder’s Meditation

“Each man is good in the sight of the Great Spirit.”

–Sitting Bull, TETON SIOUX

Our bodies are both physical and spiritual. At our very center we are spiritual. Our bodies are built around the spiritual. The center is the unseen world. Therefore, we cannot see it with our eyes and we tend to judge the body because we can see it. The body is not who we are. We can see the spiritual if we are spiritual ourselves. We won’t see this always with our physical eyes. Usually we will see it with our spiritual eye. We will hear ourselves say, “I know this to be true.”

At the center of all human beings is the place of good. That includes myself. At my very core is good. I can find this place by staying free of resentments, fear, dishonesty and self-seeking motives. My Creator, keep me free this day of resentment, selfishness, dishonesty and fear.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Yourself is good enough. You’re showing other people that you are the person you say you are, and that person is genuine to the core. Despite that, other people’s preconceived notions about you or even their individual insecurities could come out and create issues for you with little warning. Although it may be draining, keep in mind that you can only control how YOU act in a situation — their immature or harsh actions will just make them look bad! Make yourself proud.

Daily Recovery Readings
July 11, 2025

Daily Reflection

A TURNING POINT

A great turning point in our lives came when we sought for humility as something we really wanted, rather than as something we must have.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 75

Either the A.A. way of life becomes one of joy or I return to the darkness and despair of alcoholism. Joy comes to me when my attitude concerning God and humility turns to one of desire rather than of burden. The darkness in my life changes to radiant light when I arrive at the realization that being truthful and honest in dealing with my inventory results in my life being filled with serenity, freedom, and joy. Trust in my Higher Power deepens, and the flush of gratitude spreads through my being. I am convinced that being humble is being truthful and honest in dealing with myself and God. It is then that humility is something I “really want,” rather than being “something I must have.”

Big Book Quote

“Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied part of the time. But in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. Once this malady has a real hold, they are a baffled lot. There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game. But they often suspect they are down for the count.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 23~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We in Alcoholics Anonymous do not try to chart the path for the human soul or try to lay out a blueprint of the working of faith, as one might plan a charity drive. We do tell the newcomer that we have renewed our faith in a Higher Power. In the telling, our faith is further renewed. We believe that faith is always close at hand, waiting for those who will listen to the heartbeat of the spirit. We believe there is a force for good in the universe and that if we link up with this force, we are carried onward to a new life. Am I in this stream of goodness?

Meditation for the Day

God will protect you from the forces of evil, if you will rely on Him. You can face all things through the power of God, which strengthens you. Once God has set on you His stamp and seal of ownership, all His strength will serve and protect you. Remember that you are a child of the Father. Realize that the Father’s help is always ready and available to all His children, so that they can face anything. God will do all that is necessary for your spiritual well-being, if you will let Him live His way.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may rely on God as I go through this day. I pray that I may feel deeply secure, no matter what happens to me.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Bring Any Request to God

Bring any request you have to God.

No request is too large; none too small or insignificant.

How often we limit God by not bringing to God everything we want and need.

Do we need help getting our balance? Getting through the day?

Do we need help in a particular relationship? With a particular character defect? Attaining a character asset?

Do we need help making progress on a particular task that is challenging us? Do we need help with a feeling? Do we want to change a self-defeating belief that has been challenging us? Do we need information, an insight? Support? A friend?

Is there something in God’s Universe that would really bring us joy?

We can ask for it. We can ask God for whatever we want. Put the request in God’s hands, trusting it has been heard then let it go. Leave the decision to God.

Asking for what we want and need is taking care of ourselves. Trust that the Higher Power to whom we have turned over our life and will really does care about us and about what we want and need.

Today, I will ask my Higher Power for what I want and need. I will not demand-I will ask. Then I will let go.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

In playing, and perhaps only in playing, the child or adult is free to be creative.

—D. W. Winnicott

There are so many activities called play, which have not really been playful. Organized sports for youth, which consumed some of us, are called play. The partying, which was connected with some of our addictions, is called play. Reckless and dangerous driving is called play. In recovery, some of us become intensely focused on doing what’s right, and we need a deeper understanding to take the spiritual leap into creative play

This leap takes a willingness to let go. Maybe we remember hurtful things happening when our guard was down. Creative play involves trusting that every activity doesn’t need a worthy goal, doesn’t need to be planned out. Pleasure, humor, lightness, and aimless passing of time are forms of openness to the spirit of God. It is experimenting, exploring, setting aside our ordered and planned approach to most of life, and accepting that what comes out will be all right.

God, help me see the possibilities for play in the moments of this day.

Elder’s Meditation

“Do not grieve. Misfortunes will happen to the wisest and best of men. Death will come, always out of season. It is the command of the Great Spirit, and all nations and people must obey. What is past and what cannot be prevented should not be grieved for…”

–Big Elk, OMAHA Chief

Our earth continues to grow by cycles and seasons: The cycles of growth – spring, summer, fall, winter. The cycles of the human being – baby, youth, adult, elder. It is through these cycles that we will experience the changes. I will not always necessarily agree with these changes, but I need to trust the Grandfathers are in charge. Things will come and things will go. Really, I own nothing, the Creator owns all. Too often I label things as mine. I say this belongs to me, but it really belongs to the Creator. He gives me things to take care of. I need to do the best I can with what I have, with what I know at the time. And when the Creator changes things, I need to let go for His planning is the best.

Oh Great Spirit, today let me do the best I can with what I know, with what I have. Let me experience acceptance of Your will.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Investing in the right areas is presently crucial. You might have found yourself being led by intuition to someone new, the kind of friend who inspires a deep connection. It could feel like the platonic version of love at first sight! This magnetic draw may be a little unnerving, as you might not know how to handle it at first. As the conversation flows, you’ll potentially realize that this is someone who could become a staple in your life. Choose quality connections over quantity.

Daily Recovery Readings
July 10, 2025

Daily Reflection

TOWARD PEACE AND SERENITY

. . . when we have taken a square look at some of these defects, have discussed them with another, and have become willing to have them removed, our thinking about humility commences to have a wider meaning.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 74

When situations arise which destroy my serenity, pain often motivates me to ask God for clarity in seeing my part in the situation. Admitting my powerlessness, I humbly pray for acceptance. I try to see how my character defects contributed to the situation. Could I have been more patient? Was I intolerant? Did I insist on having my own way? Was I afraid? As my defects are revealed, I put self-reliance aside and humbly ask God to remove my shortcomings. The situation may not change, but as I practice exercising humility, I enjoy the peace and serenity which are the natural benefits of placing my reliance in a power greater than myself.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics these things are poison.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 66~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We in Alcoholics Anonymous do not enter into theological discussions, but in carrying our message we attempt to explain the simple “how” of the spiritual life. How faith in a Higher Power can help you to overcome loneliness, fear, and anxiety. How it can help you get along with other people. How it can make it possible for you to rise above pain, sorrow, and despondency. How it can help you to overcome your desires for the things that destroy. Have I reached a simple, effective faith?

Meditation for the Day

Expect miracles of change in people’s lives. Do not be held back by unbelief. People can be changed and they are often ready and waiting to be changed. Never believe that human nature cannot be changed. We see changed people every day. Do you have the faith to make those changes possible? Modern miracles happen every day in the lives of people. All miracles are in the realm of personalities. Human nature can be changed and is always being changed. But we must have enough faith so that we can be channels for God’s strength into the lives of others.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have the faith to expect miracles. I pray that I may be used by God to help change the lives of others.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Ending Relationships

It takes courage and honesty to end a relationship – with friends, loved ones, or a work relationship.

Sometimes, it may appear easier to let the relationship die from lack of attention rather than risk ending it. Sometimes, it may appear easier to let the other person take responsibility for ending the relationship.

We may be tempted to take a passive approach. Instead of saying how we feel, what we want or don’t want, or what we intend to do, we may begin sabotaging the relationship, hoping to force the other person to do the difficult work.

Those are ways to end relationships, but they are not the cleanest or the easiest ways.

As we walk this path of self-care, we learn that when it is time to end a relationship, the easiest way is one of honesty and directness. We are not being loving, gentle, or kind by avoiding the truth, if we know the truth.

We are not sparing the other person’s feelings by sabotaging the relationship instead of accepting the end or the change, and doing something about it. We are prolonging and increasing the pain and discomfort – for the other person and ourselves.

If we don’t know, if we are on the fence, it is more loving and honest to say that.

If we know it is time to terminate a relationship, say that.

Endings are never easy, but endings are not made easy by sabotage, indirectness, and lying about what we want and need to do. Say what you need to say, in honesty and love, when it is time. If we are trusting and listening to ourselves, we will know what to say and when to say it.

Today, I will remember that honesty and directness will increase my self-esteem. God, help me let go of my fear about owning my power to take care of myself in all my relationships.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out.

—Karl A. Menninger

Two of the problems common to men in this program are fear and lack of trust. Many of us have unconsciously enlarged our fears and returned to them again and again. Do we dwell excessively on fears? Are we too fearful about our health? Money? Jobs? Love? Jealousy? The future? What other people think?

Many of us are victims of our fears and anxieties. Fears in moderation are healthy signals to us. But we need to learn to be more trusting. We can simply open ourselves to the possibility that things will turn out well. We don’t need to be blind to the negatives – only have our eyes less fixed on them. No one can ever prove to us that it is finally safe to trust.

Fearfulness is the problem, not any one fear. Trusting our Higher Power, we set our fearfulness aside, even if a few particular fears remain.

Today, I will be open to learn about trust.

Elder’s Meditation

“Each soul must meet the morning sun, the new, sweet earth, and the great silence alone.”

–Charles Alexander Eastman, OHIYESA SANTEE SIOUX

Each morning a new sun for a new day arises. Each morning the sweet perfume from the Mother Earth spreads across the land. This combination of sun, earth, smell and quiet is a magic door for me to enter to kneel before the Grandfathers. The sacred time to commune with the Great Spirit.

Oh Great Spirit, I humbly stand before You along with the new sun, the Mother Earth and the smells of the morning. I ask You to direct my thinking today. Let me live in the silence. Teach me Your wisdom, Teach me to love my brothers and sisters. Let me respect the things You have made.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your relationships might require a closer look. You may find that you’re not receiving the same energy from someone in your life that you used to. If you address the issue, you could find that they’re feeling let down in some way. Alternatively, if you find that your connection with someone appears better than ever as your bond deepens, then you can ponder how your consistency has paid off within your connection. Hear out your friends and make an effort to understand them.

Daily Recovery Readings
July 9, 2025

Daily Reflection

I AM AN INSTRUMENT

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 70

The subject of humility is a difficult one. Humility is not thinking less of myself than I ought to; it is acknowledging that I do certain things well, it is accepting a compliment graciously.

God can only do for me what He can do through me. Humility is the result of knowing that God is the doer, not me. In the light of this awareness, how can I take pride in my accomplishments? I am an instrument and any work I seem to be doing is being done by God through me. I ask God on a daily basis to remove my shortcomings, in order that I may more freely go about my A.A. business of “love and service.”

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 28~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Disillusionment and spiritual confusion mark our age. Many of us have cast aside old ideas without acquiring new ones. Many men and women are creeping through life on their hands and knees, merely because they refuse to rely on any power but themselves. Many of them feel that they are being brave and independent, but actually they are only courting disaster. Anxiety and the inferiority complex have become the greatest of all modern plagues. In A.A. we have the answer to these ills. Have I ceased to rely on myself only?

Meditation for the Day

Disillusionment and doubt spoil life. The doubting ones are the disillusioned ones. When you are in doubt, you are on the fence. You are not going anywhere. Doubt poisons all action. “Well, I don’t know”-so you don’t do anything. You should meet life with a “Yes,” an affirmative attitude. There is good in the world and we can follow that good. There is power available to help us to do the right thing; therefore we will accept that power. There are miracles of change in people’s lives; therefore we will accept those miracles as evidence of God’s power.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I will not be paralyzed by doubt. I pray that I may go along on the venture of faith.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Overspending and Underspending

I used to beat my husband to death with my credit card. It made me feel like I had some control, some way to get even with him.

—Anonymous

I spent ten years buying everything for myself at garage sales. I didn’t even buy myself a new pair of shoes. The entire time I was depriving myself, my husband was gambling, speculating on risky business deals, and doing whatever he wanted with money. I learned that when I made a decision that I deserved to have the things I wanted, and made a decision to buy something I wanted, there was enough money to do it. It wasn’t about being frugal; it was about depriving myself, and being a martyr.

—Anonymous

Compulsive buying or overspending may give us a temporary feeling of power or satisfaction, but like other out of control behaviors, it has predictable negative consequences.

Under spending can leave us feeling victimized too.

There is a difference between responsible spending and martyred deprivation. There is a difference between treating ourselves well financially and overspending. We can learn to discern that difference. We can develop responsible spending habits that reflect high self-esteem and love for ourselves.

Today, I will strive for balance in my spending habits. If I am overspending, I will stop and deal with what’s going on inside me. If I am under spending or depriving myself, I will ask myself if that’s necessary and what I want.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.

—Herbert Spencer

We sometimes wish we could protect friends or loved ones from the consequences of their actions. We’d like to pick up the pieces after they’ve made a mess of their lives. Or we fail to look at the dark side of someone’s motives because we want only the best. Perhaps it is our controlling willfulness that tries to make things into what we want, rather than accepts things as they really are.

In our masculine recovery, a deeper love allows us to have a respectful distance from others. When we truly care about someone, we don’t snatch him or her out of his or her learning experience. When we allow our loved ones and friends to confront the natural consequences of their own actions, they learn and grow just as we do. We can be with a friend, but we are no one’s Higher Power.

Today, I will be respectful of others by letting them walk their path while I walk mine.

Elder’s Meditation

“We have to educate ourselves to know who we are. That’s what I mean when I say, ‘Teach the children.’”

–Eddie Benton-Banai, OJIBWAY

It is only by knowing ourselves that we can get in touch with our power. It is said, “Tell me what you know about yourself and I’ll tell you what you know about God. Tell me what you know about God and I’ll tell you what you know about yourself.” As we increase knowledge of ourselves, as we choose to grow spiritually, as we clean up our act, then we can teach the children.

My Creator, You have said “Know thyself.” Today let me see the wisdom of this Truth. Give me Your insight of myself. I am always walking the talk and most people can see it. Today, help and guide me on the Red Road.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your social obligations may feel more pressing than usual. Mars is bounding into your 11th House of Friendships, invigorating your platonic connections and giving you plenty of opportunities to connect with people, old and new. This transit can stir up lots of invites and events to go to wherever you can shine amongst company, but it could also create some friction among your local cliques. Be on the lookout for any shady behavior or gossiping that might throw off the amiable dynamic!

Daily Recovery Readings
July 8, 2025

Daily Reflection

AN EVER-GROWING FREEDOM

The Seventh Step is where we make the change in our attitude which permits us, with humility as our guide, to move out from ourselves toward others and toward God.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 76

When I finally asked God to remove those things blocking me from Him and the sunlight of the Spirit, I embarked on a journey more glorious than I ever imagined. I experienced a freedom from those characteristics that had me wrapped up in myself. Because of this humbling Step, I feel clean.

I am especially aware of this Step because I’m now able to be useful to God and to my fellows. I know that He has granted me strength to do His bidding and has prepared me for anyone, and anything, that comes my way today. I am truly in His hands, and I give thanks for the joy that I can be useful today.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Let families realize, as they start their journey, that all will not be fair weather. Each in his turn may be footsore and may straggle. There will be alluring shortcuts and by-paths down which they may wander and lose their way.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 122~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

A.A. members will tell you that they can look back and clearly see that they were out of control long before they finally admitted it. Every one of us has gone through that stage when we wouldn’t admit that we were alcoholics. It takes a lot of punishment to convince us, but one thing is certain. We all know from actual experience that when it comes to dishing out punishment, John Barleycorn has no equal. Have I any reservations as to my status as an alcoholic?

Meditation for the Day

There is a force for good in the world and when you are cooperating with that force for good, good things happen to you. You have free will, the choice to be on the side of right or on the side of wrong. This force for good we call God’s will. God has a purpose for the world and He has a purpose for your life. He wants you to bring all your desires into oneness with His desires. He can only work through people. If you try to make God’s will your will, He will guide you. You will be in the stream of goodness, carried along by everything that is right. You will be on God’s side.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to make God’s will my will. I pray that I may keep in the stream of goodness in the world.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Going with the Flow

Go with the flow.

Let go of fear and your need to control. Relinquish anxiety. Let it slip away, as you dive into the river of the present moment, the river of your life, your place in the universe.

Stop trying to force the direction. Try not to swim against the current, unless it is necessary for your survival. If you’ve been clinging to a branch at the riverside, let go.

Let yourself move forward. Let yourself be moved forward.

Avoid the rapids when possible. If you can’t, stay relaxed. Staying relaxed can take your safely through fierce currents. If you go under for a moment, allow yourself to surface naturally. You will.

Appreciate the beauty of the scenery, as it is. See things with freshness, with newness. You shall never pass by today’s scenery again!

Don’t think too hard about things. The flow is meant to be experienced. Within it, care for yourself. You are part of the flow, an important part. Work with the flow. Work within the flow. Thrashing about isn’t necessary. Let the flow help you care for yourself. Let it help you set boundaries, make decisions, and get you where you need to be when it is time. You can trust the flow, and your part in it.

Today, I will go with the flow.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

He was shut out from all family affairs. No one told him anything. The children, alone with their mother, told her all about the day’s happenings, everything…. But as soon as the father came in, everything stopped.

—D. H. Lawrence

Many of us men are on the outer edge of our family circles. The closeness between our children and our wives often seems more comfortable, more intimate than our relationships with them. Perhaps it’s similar to the closeness we had with our mother while our father was outside. It is painful to us and probably not entirely our own fault. We were taught that our main job was outside the home – supporting our family by earning a living. But it is up to us to change the situation.

Many of us learned from our own father that grown men stay aloof from emotional relationships, but this has hurt our relationships and alienated us from the people we most care for. Learning to know our feelings and how to express them helps us move into the family circle of intimacy.

Today, I will let go of my aloofness with my family so they can know me better.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.

Elder’s Meditation

“You are going to learn the most important lesson – that God is the most powerful thing there is.”

–Mathew King, LAKOTA

The Medicine Wheel teaches that there are two worlds – the Seen World and the Unseen World, or the Physical World and the Spiritual World. We need information from both of these worlds in order to live our lives in a harmonious way. The most difficult way is to figure things out by ourselves and leave the Great Spirit out of it. When we do this, we are making decisions with information only from the Physical World. This can be called reliance on self. If we ask the Creator to help us, we then get information from the Unseen World or the Spiritual World. The Spiritual World is where we get our power. When we do this, we are God-reliant. Being God-reliant is the same as being on the Red Road.

Great Spirit, whisper the secrets of the Unseen World in my mind’s ear.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Feeling trapped in your head is a plausible risk. It can be difficult to break free from criticisms that your brain insists on repeating, and without outside support, you might continue to be stuck in this mental loop. Reaching out to someone that you trust, perhaps an authority figure like a parent or a mentor, can show you tools to remember what you love about yourself or see your talents through their eyes. Don’t be a critic of yourself, be a cheerleader!

Daily Recovery Readings
July 7, 2025

Daily Reflection

. . . AND LETTING GO OF IT

“. . . primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual disturbance and frustration. Therefore, no peace was to be had unless we could find a means of reducing these demands. The difference between a demand and a simple request is plain to anyone.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 76

Peace is possible for me only when I let go of expectations. When I’m trapped in thoughts about what I want and what should be coming to me, I’m in a state of fear or anxious anticipation and this is not conducive to emotional sobriety. I must surrender – over and over – to the reality of my dependence on God, for then I find peace, gratitude and spiritual security.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family back. This just isn’t so. In some cases the wife will never come back for one reason or another. Remind the prospect that his recovery is not dependent upon people. It is dependent upon his relationship with God. We have seen men get well whose families have not returned at all. We have seen others slip when the family came back too soon.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 99~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We had become hopelessly sick people, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. The power that controlled us was greater than ourselves – it was John Barleycorn. Many drinkers have said: “I hadn’t gone that far; I hadn’t lost my job on account of drink; I still had my family; I managed to keep out of jail. True, I took too much sometimes and I guess I managed to make quite an ass of myself when I did, but I still thought I could control my drinking. I didn’t really believe that I was an alcoholic.” If I was one of these, have I fully changed my mind?

Meditation for the Day

Painful as the present time may be, you will one day see the reason for it. You will see that it was not only testing, but also a preparation for the life work, which you are to do. Have faith that your prayers and aspirations will some day be answered. Answered in a way that perhaps seems painful to you but is the only right way. Selfishness and pride often make us want things that are not good for us. They need to be burned out of our natures. We must be rid of the blocks, which are holding us back, before we can expect our prayers to be answered.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be willing to go through a time of testing. I pray that I may trust God for the outcome.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Getting It All Out

Let yourself have a good gripe session.
From: ” Woman, Sex, and Addiction”
—Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.

Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it’s not okay to gripe and complain. We may tell ourselves that if we were really working a good program, we wouldn’t need to complain.

What does that mean? We won’t have feelings? We won’t feel overwhelmed? We won’t need to blow off steam or work through some not so pleasant, not so perfect, and not so pretty parts of life?

We can let ourselves get our feelings out, take risks, and be vulnerable with others. We don’t have to be all put together, all the time. That sounds more like codependency than recovery.

Getting it all out doesn’t mean we need to be victims. It doesn’t mean we need to revel in our misery, finding status in our martyrdom. It doesn’t mean we won’t go on to set boundaries. It doesn’t mean we won’t take care of ourselves.

Sometimes, getting it all out is an essential part of taking care of ourselves. We reach a point of surrender so we can move forward.

Self-disclosure does not mean only quietly reporting our feelings. It means we occasionally take the risk to share our human side-the side with fears, sadness, hurt, rage, unreasonable anger, weariness, or lack of faith.

We can let our humanity show. In the process, we give others permission to be human too. “Together” people have their not so together moments. Sometimes, falling apart – getting it all out – is how we get put back together.

Today, I will let it all out if I need a release.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee!

—Willard S. Krabill

We men have fallen into many difficulties because of poorly defined personal boundaries. Some of us never learned to say no to our mothers and felt invaded or ruled by them. Or we never truly said no to our fathers – never went through a teenage rebellion to establish ourselves as adults. Others have gotten stuck saying no and have never learned to yield and say yes.

Boundary problems have been part of the difficulty in many areas of our lives. We’ve told ourselves we have no right to our yes or no, or we’ve said we’re strong enough to sacrifice for someone else, or we’ve welcomed the escape from ourselves in discarding our choice. Not saying no when we needed to or not saying yes when we wanted to has led many of us into doctors’ offices, courts, jails, lost jobs, divorces, and bad marriages. Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.

I am learning to know myself by defining my boundaries and choosing when and when not to cross them.

Elder’s Meditation

“I believe much trouble and blood would be saved if we opened our hearts more.”

–Chief Joseph, NEZ PERCE

We are as sick as our secrets. Our ego takes over control of our lives and when that happens our minds get very sick. Then we hurt people and our minds will always justify our actions. Our minds will give us rationalization and excuses that we are justified in doing what we are doing.

My Creator, Let me live today with an open heart. Let me realize to be vulnerable is a strength, not a weakness. Let me realize the power of an open heart. Let me be available to truth. If I get into trouble, let me hear the whisper of your guidance. Let me make heart decisions and let my head catch up to that decision.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

The changes in your life might be obscured. When incremental changes occur, it can be difficult to tell if you’re genuinely making a lasting impact. It may be that you are unaware of a change that’s going on within you, but others are still noticing. There’s also the chance that there are changes going on behind closed doors that will affect you for the better. Instead of worrying that your shifts aren’t occurring, trust that they have yet to reveal themselves.