Author: mikeykjr

This blog reflects the thoughts and feelings of a gay, alcoholic/addict. Sobriety, for me, is the #1 priority in life. I wouldn't be here today without the dedication to my own sobriety. I hope through this site, I can help others battling with an addiction, struggling with recovery or those looking for a better understanding of an addict and what we go through in life. I tend to write long, rambling posts, so grab some coffee, get comfortable and enjoy yourself. Also, subscribe/follow!

DR – February 5, 2018

On February 5, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for February 5, 2018:

Daily Reflection

A GLORIOUS RELEASE

“The minute I stopped arguing, I could begin to see and feel. Right there, Step Two gently and very gradually began to infiltrate my life. I can’t say upon what occasion or upon what day I came to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I certainly have that belief now. To acquire it, I had only to stop fighting and practice the rest of A.A.’s program as enthusiastically as I could.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 27

After years of indulging in a “self-will run riot,” Step Two became for me a glorious release from being all alone. Nothing is so painful or insurmountable in my journey now. Someone is always there to share life’s burdens with me. Step Two became a reinforcement with God, and I now realize that my insanity and ego were curiously linked. To rid myself of the former, I must give up the latter to one with far broader shoulders than my own.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“If we skip this vital step (5th Step), we may not overcome drinking. Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk. Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell. We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear; they only thought they had humbled themselves. But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else all their life story.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 72~

Keep It Simple

Don’t bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it.
——Thomas Jefferson

Pleasure is important in recovery. But at times we think pleasure is the answer to life’s pains. Alcohol and other drugs were what we liked best. We need to watch out so we don’t switch to another addiction–such as gambling, food, sex, or work. The real answer to life’s pains is in having a strong spiritual center. It is also our best way to avoid another addiction. Recovery lets us turn our pain over to the care of our Higher Power. Our Higher Power can handle any problem we may have. Our program can help us with our problems too. Recovery is a three-way deal. Higher Power, program, and us.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me avoid another addiction. When I have problems, have me come to You and to my program before anything else.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll set aside time and ask the question, “Am I headed for another addiction/” I’ll also ask my sponsor what he or she thinks.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

The accuracy of your perceptions may be called into question today. But instead of standing up to defend your position, you might just disappear behind your self-protective wall. You are strong enough to fend off nearly any attack; you just don’t want to be pulled down into such an unnecessary conflict. It’s hard to understand why others can’t just accept that your perspective is different from theirs. Nevertheless, you need to decide whether it’s smarter to base your current strategy on fight or flight. Either way, you must live with your decision.

DR – February 4, 2018

On February 4, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for February 4, 2018:

Daily Reflection

WHEN FAITH IS MISSING

Sometimes A.A. comes harder to those who have lost or rejected faith than to those who never had any faith at all, for they think they have tried faith and found it wanting. They have tried the way of faith and the way of no faith.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 28

I was so sure God had failed me that I became ultimately defiant, though I knew better, and plunged into a final drinking binge. My faith turned bitter and that was no coincidence. Those who once had great faith hit bottom harder. It took time to rekindle my faith, though I came to A.A. I was grateful intellectually to have survived such a great fall, but my heart felt callous. Still, I stuck with the A.A. program; the alternatives were too bleak! I kept coming back and gradually my faith was resurrected.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, A Vision For You, pg. 164

Keep It Simple

We do not remember days, we remember moments.—-Cesare Pavese

It’s the moment that’s important. Each moment holds choice. Our spirits grow through working our program moment to moment. Moments lead to days, days to years, and years to a life of honest recovery.

It will be the moments of choice that we remember. The moment we call a friend instead of being alone.

The moment we decide to go for a walk instead of arguing with our partner. The moment we decide to go to an extra meeting instead of drinking or using other drugs. The moments lead us to our Higher Power.

These moments teach us that we’re human, that we need others. At these moments, we know others care about us–our joys, and our struggles.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me remember that my recovery is made up of many moments of choice.

Today’s Action:
I’ll look back over the last twenty-four hours. What moments come to mind? Why were they important to me.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Enjoying activities with family or friends sounds like a good idea as long as whatever you commit to doesn’t turn into something else. A simple walk in the park could morph into a rigorous hike. A run to the store can become a major shopping spree. The problem is your inability to influence the flow of events today when others are involved. Going out of your way to clearly set limits on your time might seem like an excessive precaution at first, but will likely save the day from spinning out of control. Busy does not equal success.

DR – February 3, 2018

On February 3, 2018February 21, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for February 3, 2018:

Daily Reflection

FILLING THE VOID

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. “Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?” As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 47

I was always fascinated with the study of scientific principles. I was emotionally and physically distant from people while I pursued Absolute Knowledge. God and spirituality were meaningless academic exercises. I was a modern man of science, knowledge was my Higher Power. Given the right set of equations, life was merely another problem to solve. Yet my inner self was dying from my outer man’s solution to life’s problems and the solution was alcohol. In spite of my intelligence, alcohol became my Higher Power. It was through the unconditional love which emanated from A.A. people and meetings that I was able to discard alcohol as my Higher Power. The great void was filled. I was no longer lonely and apart from life. I had found a true power greater than myself, I had found God’s love. There is only one equation which really matters to me now: God is in A.A.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal consequences may be.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 79~

Keep It Simple

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.—Erma Bombeck

We often hear, “Stick with the winners.” Not everyone in Twelve Step meetings is there for recovery.. But many members follow a Twelve Step way of living. We need to find those people. This is really true when it comes to finding a sponsor. Look for a sponsor who gets good things from his or her program. Why pick a sponsor who isn’t happy in the program? Recovery is hard work. You deserve the best. Find the best sponsor you can. Remember, ours is a selfish program. we’re fighting for our lives.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me find the best in my program. Help me find a good sponsor, so we can get as much from each other and this program as we can.

Today’s Action:
Today I’ll think about what it means to have a good sponsor.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your day is like a blank canvas, waiting to be filled in with your activities. Your anticipation grows as you put the various pieces in their places. You have high hopes today, and don’t want to blow it by scheduling too much. Unfortunately, you could leave yourself enough downtime that you waste your momentum. Give the planning stage your absolute best, but then let it go. It’s wonderful if you accomplish everything, but it’s not the end of the world if you don’t.

DR – February 2, 2018

On February 2, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for February 2, 2018:

Daily Reflection

RESCUED BY SURRENDERING

“Characteristic of the so-called typical alcoholic is a narcissistic egocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence, intent on maintaining at all costs its inner integrity. . . . Inwardly the alcoholic brooks no control from man or God. He, the alcoholic, is and must be the master of his destiny. He will fight to the end to preserve that position.”

— A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 311

The great mystery is: “Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths, fighting to preserve the ‘independence’ of our ego, while others seem to sober up effortlessly in A.A.?” Help from a Higher Power, the gift of sobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop drinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions of the men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reaching out to God and my fellows could I be rescued.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn’t.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, pg. 53~

Keep It Simple

We must believe the things we teach our children.——-Woodrow Wilson

It may be easy to say the words and phrases we’ve heard without really meaning them. Someone says something at a meeting that sounds good. Our counselor has a favorite saying. We may say these words,
but are we taking the time to ask the question. Do I believe what I’m saying?

Step Two speaks of, “Came to believe…” By really believing in the Twelve Steps, we let them become part of us. The more we believe in the Steps the more we turn our lives over to them. Hopefully, over time, the Twelve Steps will guide us more and more. We’ll speak to our family with respect we’ve found in the Twelve Steps. Our spirit must truly believe. Then we can work the Steps.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, believing is something that lasts a lifetime. Give me the power to believe even when doubt creeps in.

Action for the Day:
My beliefs are changing. Today, in my inventory, I’ll ask: Do I believe what I said today?

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your quiet demeanor could leave you feeling isolated today. However, examining your motives might reveal your aversion to being distracted by everyone else’s projects and problems because you don’t want to lose focus on your own. Your cautious behavior doesn’t stem from a desire to be alone; your goal now is to turn your inner passions into outer manifestations — and you can’t do that while attending to others. Author Nathan W. Morris wrote, “It’s not always that we need to do more but rather that we need to focus on less.”

Resentment

On February 1, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Personal4 Comments

“Resentment is the “number one” offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick.”

“In dealing with resentments, we set them on paper.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, Big Book, page 64.

scroll

NOTE: This post did NOT go in one direction as intended, sadly…

Resentments tend to build with time unless we take the initiative to resolve our issues as the Steps have taught me. If not, harboring such resentments will lead us down dark paths, possible relapse and for some death. Far to long have I ignored such a resentment while it was at the end of my nose.

The beginning of 2018 was an especially difficult time for me. But it really didn’t begin there. The disappointment, anger, and fear has been festering for quite some time. Day by day as I put one foot in front of the other, struggling with each day, I have simply ignored it. I have struggled to deal with it. However, this morning I’m determined to change the direction I’m heading before its to late. Thus, “setting them on paper.”

It’s now obvious to me, though I am sure to others it’s been obvious for a while, I need a new direction in my life. I made perhaps the worst decision of my life becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant. It was a decision I made out of desperation. At the time I needed a job. I convinced myself, despite my knowledge of the field, “things won’t be so bad”. With seven years of sobriety under my belt, I could handle almost anything. Oh, how I was so wrong!

The complete disregard for human life, the disrespect of our elderly and their lives, the lack of compassion and understanding, the greed of corporations and those working in the field turning a blind eye to all of it absolutely disgusts me. It is suggested, knowing this, if I make one person’s life more bearable today, then I have done my job. Really? Therefore, I should be happy with myself for the fifteen minutes or less I spend with someone to bring some sort of compassion back in their life when only moments later it’ll be wiped away when the next person steps in? I find no comfort in that at all. In this case, there is no compromise. There is only one solution ahead of me – a new direction.

As of now, I am not simply walking away. I can’t and I won’t. Until such time that I sever such relationships, I am required by NYS to uphold these core values:

(1) the dignity and worth of each resident as an individual;

(2) a respect for the range of diversity of individuals;

(3) a demonstration of a therapeutic relationship.

Now I can breathe . . .

Since I already have a AAS in Computer Science Information Systems, which is completely useless these days, I have decided to look into a Bachelor’s of Science degree. However, this will be a struggle too.

My previous college experience has gotten me in a large debt. So, I need to get approved for additional funding. At the same time, I still have to work in my current field to help pay the bills all the while going to college at the same time. Therefore, there will be many battles going on at once.

Do I really want to take that plunge?

For now, I’ll write more later . . .

DR – February 1, 2018

On February 1, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for February 1, 2018:

Daily Reflection

GOAL: SANITY

“. . . Step Two gently and very gradually began to infiltrate my life. I can’t say upon what occasion or upon what day I came to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I certainly have that belief now.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 27

“Came to believe!” I gave lip service to my belief when I felt like it or when I thought it would look good. I didn’t really trust God. I didn’t believe He cared for me. I kept trying to change things I couldn’t change. Gradually, in disgust, I began to turn it all over, saying: “You’re so omnipotent, you take care of it.” He did. I began to receive answers to my deepest problems, sometimes at the most unusual times: driving to work, eating lunch, or when I was sound asleep. I realized that I hadn’t thought of those solutions—a Power greater than myself had given them to me. I came to believe.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 62~

Keep It Simple

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

—Step Two

The Second Step directs us to believe there is hope for us. It may take time to believe this. Many of us had given up hope. But look around. Hope fills our meeting rooms. We are surrounded by miracles. This Power greater than ourselves has healed many. Listen as others tell their stories. They speak of how powerful this Power is. At times, we will not believe. This is normal But in recovery ,”coming to believe” means opening ourselves up to healing power found in the program.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, allow me to believe Help me to stay open to recovery.

Action for the Day:
I will list three examples of my past insanity. I will share these examples with my group, sponsor, a program friend, or with my Higher Power. I will remember that I’m a miracle.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You thrive on your closest nurturing connections and tend to suffer when you feel distance between you and others. Ironically, an odd sense of detachment allows you to go even deeper into this subjective realm today. Exploring your passions from an intellectual perspective subdues the surface intensity now, and is inviting to people who might otherwise be frightened off by an overly emotional tilt to a conversation. Nevertheless, a rational discussion will leave you unsatisfied. Journalist Herb Caen wrote, “Logic is no answer to passion.”

DR – January 31, 2018

On January 31, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 31, 2018:

Daily Reflection

OUR COMMON WELFARE COMES FIRST
The unity of Alcoholics Anonymous is the most cherished quality our Society has. . . . We stay whole, or A.A. dies.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 129

Our Traditions are key elements in the ego deflation process necessary to achieve and maintain sobriety in Alcoholics Anonymous. The First Tradition reminds me not to take credit, or authority, for my recovery. Placing our common welfare first reminds me not to become a healer in this program; I am still one of the patients. Self-effacing elders built the ward. Without it, I doubt I would be alive. Without the group, few alcoholics would recover.

The active role in renewed surrender of will enables me to step aside from the need to dominate, the desire for recognition, both of which played so great a part in my active alcoholism. Deferring my personal desires for the greater good of group growth contributes toward A.A. unity that is central to all recovery. It helps me to remember that the whole is greater than the sum of all its parts.

Big Book Quote

“Although financial recovery is on the way for many of us, we found
we could not place money first. For us, material well-being always
followed spiritual progress; it never preceded.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 127~

Keep It Simple

Do not cut down the tree that gives you shade.—Arabian proverb

We need to remember what got us well. The Twelve Steps heal us. The meetings we attend heal us.
Reading and listening to program tapes heals us. Talking with our sponsors heals us. The time we spend with program friends heals us. Sometimes we’re pressed for time. As a result, we have to make choices about how to use our time. We may think we know enough about the program. We may feel like cutting down on meetings. These are danger signs. We only know how to stay sober One Day at a Time: by working the Steps. Let’s not forget them as we grow in this program. It may seem like we’ve been recovering a long time, but we’re all beginners.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, I’ve found You in the program. Help me find ways to stay a “beginner” in the program.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll take time to read the Twelve Steps. I’ll meditate on how much these Steps have given me.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You could feel financially overwhelmed today, but concerns about your wealth are often tied to deeper issues about your self-worth. Nevertheless, the Leo Full Moon Eclipse falls in your 2nd House of Money, challenging you to improve your resource management skills. The Moon’s awkward misalignment to nebulous Neptune lures you to chase an impractical dream without regard to its physical or metaphysical cost. Turning your idealistic visions into reality requires setting practical limits.

DR – January 30, 2018

On January 31, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 30, 2018:

Daily Reflection

FREEDOM FROM . . . FREEDOM TO

“We are going to know a new freedom. . . ” ~~ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS , p. 83

Freedom for me is both freedom from and freedom to. The first freedom I enjoy is freedom from the slavery of alcohol. What a relief! Then I begin to experience freedom from fear – fear of people, of economic insecurity, of commitment, of failure, of rejection. Then I begin to enjoy freedom to – freedom to choose sobriety for today, freedom to be myself, freedom to express my opinion, to experience peace of mind, to love and be loved, and freedom to grow spiritually. But how can I achieve these freedoms? The Big Book clearly says that before I am halfway through making amends, I will begin to know a “new” freedom; not the old freedom of doing what I pleased, without regard to others, but the new freedom that allows fulfillment of the promises in my life. What a joy to be free!

Big Book Quote

“We have begun to comprehend their futility and their fatality. We have commenced to see their terrible destructiveness. We have begun to learn tolerance, patience and good will toward all men, even our enemies, for we look on them as sick people.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, Pg. 70~

Keep It Simple

Go and wake up your luck—Perian proverb

We’ve been given recovery. For this, we’re lucky. And we’re grateful. Now it’s up to us.

We must accept our choices. When we’re afraid, do we choose to be alone? Or do we choose togo to extra meeting? When we’re not honest, do we keep it secret? Or do we admit it and try to be more honest? No matter what we choose, we’re responsible for that choice. Through choices, we either make our program strong or weak. We can choose to be lucky. Or we can choose not to be. The choice is ours. Our addiction robbed us of choice. It taught us to blame others. Now we see ourselves as responsible.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me to choose wisely. Help me remember I’m responsible for my choices.

Action for the Day:
Today I’ll work at being responsible for my choices. I’ll see myself as one of the lucky ones.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You may feel anxious about having a heartfelt conversation with someone today. Something has been weighing on your mind, but you’ve been avoiding the issue for the sake of harmony. You’re feeling a strong urge to take a risk and bring the subject up because it seems as if the opportunity for a good discussion is now or never. Don’t wait; although the pressure to communicate will probably be gone by tomorrow, you will wish you talked about it while you still had a chance.

DR – January 29, 2018

On January 29, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 29, 2018:

Daily Reflection

THE JOY OF SHARING

Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89

To know that each newcomer with whom I share has the opportunity to experience the relief that I have found in this Fellowship fills me with joy and gratitude. I feel that all the things described in A.A. will come to pass for them, as they have for me, if they seize the opportunity and embrace the program fully.

Big Book Quote

“More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn’t deserve it.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 73~

Keep It Simple

An alcoholic spends his life committing suicide on the installment plan.
–Laurence Peter

None of us woke up one morning and found we had suddenly turned into an addict. We got to be one by practice. And we practiced often. We ignored our families–we left work early–and went drinking and drugging. Daily, we chose chemicals over anything else. Likewise, getting sober is no accident. We work the program. At meetings, we’re reminded to help others. We all get sober on the installment plan. A day at a time. We got sick one day at a time; we recover one day at a time.

Prayer for the Day:
Today, with my Higher Power’s help, I’ll be happier, more honest, more sober. Sobriety is like a good savings account. Higher Power, help me to put in more than I take out.

Action for the Day:
I’ll go over my Step One to remind myself it’s no accident I’m an addict.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You are thrilled when people acknowledge your contributions at work and at home. However, in the absence of positive feedback now, you could fabricate complete sob stories about your shortcomings or epic tales of your conquests. Entertaining fantasies is a double-edged sword. You can imagine wonderful things about yourself and then set a course to manifest these dreams. Or, you could amplify your concerns into worst-case scenarios. Corrie ten Boom wrote, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

DR – January 28, 2018

On January 28, 2018January 29, 2018 By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 28, 2018:

Daily Reflection

THE TREASURE OF THE PAST

Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have — the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 124

What a gift it is for me to realize that all those seemingly useless years were not wasted. The most degrading and humiliating experiences turn out to be the most powerful tools in helping others to recover. In knowing the depths of shame and despair, I can reach out with a loving and compassionate hand, and know that the grace of God is available to me.

Big Book Quote

3rd Step Prayer:

“God, I offer myself to Thee—, to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may
bear witness to those I would help if Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 63~

Keep It Simple

We’re part of the fellowship we call “the program.” Let’s also remember that we’re part of a larger fellowship called ” the human race.” We all hurt the same. We all love the same. We all need understanding and care. Yet, in other ways, we are not all the same. Let’s remember to understand differences among people. If not, we’ll be afraid of anyone who’s not like us. And this isn’t God’s way.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me to love all people. Help me be open to others who are different from me. Help me love my neighbor.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You don’t want anyone to know about your unstable emotions today and you’re quite surprised when you find out people are talking about you. You’re even more shocked when you realize how much they’re making up with a total disregard — even a disinterest — in the facts. Fortunately, you can choose not to let the insensitivity of others bother you as you go about your work. But this hurtful situation could come back to haunt you later this evening. You may quietly come to terms with the idea that you need to stand up for yourself. You can’t change what you refuse to confront.