Daily Recovery Readings
February 7, 2024

Daily Reflection

True humility and an open mind can lead us to faith, and every A.A. meeting is an assurance that God will restore us to sanity if we rightly relate ourselves to Him.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 33

My last drunk had landed me in the hospital, totally broken. It was then that I was able to see my past float in front of me. I realized that, through drinking, I had lived every nightmare I had ever had. My own self-will and obsession to drink had driven me into a dark pit of hallucinations, blackouts and despair. Finally beaten, I asked for God’s help. His presence told me to believe. My obsession for alcohol was taken away and my paranoia has since been lifted. I am no longer afraid. I know my life is healthy and sane.

Big Book Quote

“Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 89~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

A nightclub crowded with men and women all dressed up in evening clothes looks like a very gay place. But you should see the men’s room of that nightclub the next morning. What a mess! People have been sick all over the place and does it smell! The glamour of the night before is all gone and only the stink of the morning after is left. In A.A., we learn to take a long view of drinking instead of a short view. We learn to think less about the pleasure of the moment and more about the consequences. Has the night before become less important to me and the morning after more important?

Meditation for the Day

Only a few more steps and then God’s power shall be seen and known in my life. I am now walking in darkness, surrounded by the limitations of space and time. But even in this darkness, I can have faith and can be a light to guide feet that are afraid. I believe that God’s power will break through the darkness and my prayers will pierce even to the ears of God Himself. But only a cry from the heart, a trusting cry, ever pierces that darkness and reaches to the divine ear of God.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that the divine power of God will help my human weakness. I pray that my prayer may reach through the darkness to the ear of God.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Owning Our Power

We need to make a distinction between powerlessness and owning our power.

The first step in recovery is accepting powerlessness. There are some things we can’t do, no matter how long or hard we try. These things include changing other people, solving their problems, and controlling their behavior. Sometimes, we feel powerless over ourselves – what we feel or believe, or the effects of a particular situation or person on us.

It’s important to surrender to powerlessness, but it’s equally important to own our power. We aren’t trapped. We aren’t helpless. Sometimes it may feel like we are, but we aren’t. We each have the God-given power, and the right, to take care of ourselves in any circumstance, and with any person. The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.

Let the power come to walk that path.

Today, I will remember that I can take care of my self. I have choices, and I can exercise the options I choose without guilt.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We cannot merely pray to You, 0 God, to end war;
For we know that You have made the world in a way
That man must find his own path to peace
Within himself and with his neighbor.

—Jack Riemer

Our conscious contact with God can be called prayer. There are many forms of prayer for a man in this program. For some of us it may take the form of talking to God; for others it may be silent meditation, observing nature, listening to music, or writing in a journal.

We have experienced the healing effect of this relationship. It has allowed us to move out of our willfulness. But we need to take action where we can make a difference. We cannot blame God for every bad thing that happens – or simply wait for God to provide all the good we want. Do we see the power we do have to influence our lives? Can we give up our resentments against God for bad things that have happened?

I am grateful for what God has given me and more aware of what I can do.

Elder’s Meditation

“I can tell you that understanding begins with love and respect. It begins with respect for the Great Spirit. All things – and I mean ALL things – have their own will and their own way and their own purpose; this is what is to be respected.”

–Rolling Thunder, CHEROKEE

Everything on earth has a purpose and is designed special. No two things are created identical. Sometimes in our minds we have a picture of how things should be, and often what we see is different from what they really are. When this happens we often want to control how things are, making them act or behave according to our picture. We need to leave things alone. God is running all things. How do we do this? In our minds we tell ourselves to love all things and respect all things just as they are. Accept what we cannot change.

Great Spirit, teach me the value of respect and help me to accept people, places and things just as they are.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Finding meaning in a painful experience could be a compelling pursuit for you now. A candid conversation with a friend has the potential to shift your perspective. However, not every big idea out there will be the one that resonates with you personally — and some may even offend you. If your companion makes a claim that rubs you the wrong way, say so rather than seething to yourself. No matter how good their intentions are, they’re better off knowing how they sound.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 6, 2024

Daily Reflection

A RALLYING POINT

Therefore, Step Two is the rallying point for all of us. Whether agnostic, atheist, or former believer, we can stand together on this Step.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 33

I feel that A.A. is a God-inspired program and that God is at every A.A. meeting. I see, believe, and have come to know that A.A. works, because I have stayed sober today. I am turning my life over to A.A. and to God by going to an A.A. meeting. If God is in my heart and everyone else’s, then I am a small part of a whole and I am not unique. If God is in my heart and He speaks to me through other people, then I must be a channel of God to other people. I should seek to do His will by living spiritual principles and my reward will be sanity and emotional sobriety.

Big Book Quote

“God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But
obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, A Vision For You, pg. 164~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

On a dark night, the bright lights of the corner tavern look mighty inviting. Inside, there seems to be warmth and good cheer. But we don’t stop to think that if we go in there we’ll probably end up drunk, with our money spent and an awful hangover. A long mahogany bar in the tropical moonlight looks like a very gay place. But you should see the place the next morning. The chairs are piled on the tables and the place stinks of stale beer and cigarette stubs. And often we are there too, trying to cure the shakes by gulping down straight whiskey. Can I look straight through the night before and see the morning after?

Meditation for the Day

God finds, amid the crowd, a few people who follow Him, just to be near Him, just to dwell in His presence. A longing in the Eternal Heart may be satisfied by these few people. I will let God know that I seek just to dwell in His presence, to be near Him, not so much for teaching or a message, as just for Him. It may be that the longing of the human heart to be loved for itself is something caught from the Great Divine Heart.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have a listening ear, so that God may speak to me. I pray that I may have a waiting heart, so that God may come to me.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Stopping Victimization

Before recovery, many of us lacked a frame of reference with which to name the victimization and abuse in our life. We may have thought it was normal that people mistreated us. We may have believed we deserved mistreatment; we may have been attracted to people who mistreated us.

We need to let go, on a deep level, of our need to be victimized and to be victims. We need to let go of our need to be in dysfunctional relationships and systems at work, in love, in family relationships, in friendships. We deserve better. We deserve much better. It is our right. When we believe in our right to happiness, we will have happiness.

We will fight for that right, and the fight will emerge from our souls. Break free from oppression and victimization.

Today, I will liberate myself by letting go of my need to be a victim, and I’ll explore my freedom to take care of myself. That liberation will not take me further away from people I love. It will bring me closer to people and more in harmony with God’s plan for my life.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Behind an able man there are always other able men.

—Chinese proverb

Most of us have had a strong desire in our lives to “do it ourselves.” We have had the idea that strength and independence meant we should not rely on or receive help from others. Now, in recovery, we are learning a far more mature and time-honored principle. We find strength to develop to our fullest as members of a community. Maybe we never learned how to ask for help. Perhaps we haven’t learned yet how to accept it. It may still be difficult to express our gratitude for the help that brought us where we are today.

In recovery, we get many lessons about these things. If we are actively growing, we will get help from others and give it too. The rewards of recovery give us ample reasons and opportunities to express our gratitude. We are no longer loners. Now we have a network of friends who truly enjoy and enhance each other’s strength.

Today, I pray for help in learning how to share my strength and to appreciate the strength of others.

Elder’s Meditation

“We hold on to our otuhan, our give-aways, because they help us to remain Indians.”

–Lame Deer, LAKOTA

Our traditional communities and villages function on interdependence. Share the deer and give freely of what you have to another. Another way to express this principle is, it’s better to give than to receive. To share what you have eliminates complexity. The Elders say, live a simple life. One of the principles in the Unseen World is, the more you give, the more you get. You can become a channel for abundance for your family, tribe, or community. A giving person sets up a flow or replacement. Whatever you share will be returned to you in an amount equal or greater. The Indian way is for everyone to give to another, thus the community wins.

Great Spirit, today, teach me the principle of giving. Let me be Your channel of abundance.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

A friend may currently guide you toward some needed perspective on your political or spiritual beliefs. You don’t necessarily have to abandon the main tenets that provide structure to your life, but there could be a less restrictive way of viewing the details as the compassionate Moon in your relationship zone trines expansive Jupiter in your visionary 11th house. A judgmental attitude, no matter how well-intentioned, usually doesn’t help you connect with others — do your best to appreciate their humanity instead.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 5, 2024

Daily Reflection

A GLORIOUS RELEASE

“The minute I stopped arguing, I could begin to see and feel. Right there, Step Two gently and very gradually began to infiltrate my life. I can’t say upon what occasion or upon what day I came to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I certainly have that belief now. To acquire it, I had only to stop fighting and practice the rest of A.A.’s program as enthusiastically as I could.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 27

After years of indulging in a “self-will run riot,” Step Two became for me a glorious release from being all alone. Nothing is so painful or insurmountable in my journey now. Someone is always there to share life’s burdens with me. Step Two became a reinforcement with God, and I now realize that my insanity and ego were curiously linked. To rid myself of the former, I must give up the latter to one with far broader shoulders than my own.

Big Book Quote

“If we skip this vital step (5th Step), we may not overcome drinking. Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk. Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell. We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear; they only thought they had humbled themselves. But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else all their life story.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 72~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

One thing we learn in A.A. is to take a long view of drinking instead of a short view. When we were drinking we thought more about the pleasure or release that a drink would give us than we did about the consequences that would result from our taking that drink. Liquor looks good from the short view. When we look in a package store window, we see liquor dressed up in its best wrappings, with fancy labels and decorations. They look swell. But have I learned that what’s inside those beautiful bottles is just plain poison to me?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that life is a school in which I must learn spiritual things. I must trust in God and He will teach me. I must listen to God and He will speak through my mind. I must commune with Him in spite of all opposition and every obstacle. There will be days when I will hear no voice in my mind and when there will come no intimate heart to heart communion. But if I persist, and make a life habit of schooling myself in spiritual things, God will reveal Himself to me in many ways.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may regularly go to school in things of the spirit. I pray that I may grow spiritually by making a practice of these things.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Financial Responsibility

We are responsible for ourselves financially.

What a frightening, grown up thought that is for many of us – taking responsibility for money and our financial affairs. For many of us, handing over responsibility for our financial affairs has been part of a codependent trade off in our relationships.

Some of our emotional dependency on others, on this tight tie that binds us to others, not in love, but in need and desperation, is directly related to financial dependency. Our fears and reluctance to take responsibility for our financial affairs can be a barrier to the freedom we’re seeking in recovery.

Financial responsibility is an attitude. Money goes out to pay for necessities and luxuries. Money must come in, in order to go out. How much needs to come in to equal that which is going out?

Taxes… savings plans…appropriate spending habits that demonstrate an attitude of financial responsibility…. Part of being alive means learning to handle money. Even if we have a healthy contract with someone that allows us to depend on him or her for money, we still need to understand how money works. We still need to adopt an attitude of financial responsibility for ourselves. Even if we have a contract with someone else to provide for our financial needs, we need to understand the workings of the money earned and spent in our life.

Self-esteem will increase when we increase our sense of being financially responsible for ourselves. We can start where we are, with what we have today.

God, help me become willing to let go of my fears and reluctance to face the necessary parts of handling money responsibly in my life. Show me the lessons I need to learn about money.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The human animal needs a freedom seldom mentioned: freedom from intrusion. He needs a little privacy quite as much as he wants understanding or vitamins or exercise or praise.

—Phyllis McGinley

The boundaries between us in our families and our friendships often need to be reshaped in recovery. We need to know our feelings are private. We reveal them at our choosing, with whom we choose. We give up on mind reading or probing because it intrudes upon another’s privacy. We actively engage in our relationships by sharing ourselves and listening to each other.

A secret that makes a relationship dishonest is destructive and ought to be told. But we cannot force another person to be honest, or pry the truth from a loved one. We can only be honest ourselves and guard our own right to privacy. Intimacy is the bridge, which is built between two separate people. Only when we let others have their privacy and we take ours can our relationships be more intimate.

I will maintain the boundaries of my privacy today and respect the right of others to do the same.

Elder’s Meditation

“Let the person I serve express his thanks according to his own bringing up and his sense of humor.”

–Charles A. Eastman (Ohiyesa), SANTEE SIOUX

“It is better to give than receive.” But it doesn’t really matter if we are giving or receiving. There is an identical feeling associated with both. We get this feeling every time we receive. We can’t control when we receive gifts but we can control when we give gifts. Therefore, the more we give, the better we feel. When we are given gifts, or someone does something for us, it is the Indian way to honor this person.

Great Spirit, let me honor and be respectful to those who are good to me today.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You may need to rock the boat to move a close relationship out of a recent rut. Due to amiable Venus in your partnership zone conflicting with wounded Chiron in your ambitious 10th house, a shared goal is likely weighing on you, but the other person might not be happy to discuss it. No matter how uncomfortable it is at first, this is an opportunity to build deeper intimacy between the two of you. You could ultimately get what you want by making this effort.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 4, 2024

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Daily Reflection

WHEN FAITH IS MISSING

Sometimes A.A. comes harder to those who have lost or rejected faith than to those who never had any faith at all, for they think they have tried faith and found it wanting. They have tried the way of faith and the way of no faith.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 28

I was so sure God had failed me that I became ultimately defiant, though I knew better, and plunged into a final drinking binge. My faith turned bitter and that was no coincidence. Those who once had great faith hit bottom harder. It took time to rekindle my faith, though I came to A.A. I was grateful intellectually to have survived such a great fall, but my heart felt callous. Still, I stuck with the A.A. program; the alternatives were too bleak! I kept coming back and gradually my faith was resurrected.

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Big Book Quote

“We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the others’ alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. Among us, these are rare occurrences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost invariably temper such talk by a spirit of love and tolerance.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 125~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Treating others to drinks gave us a kind of satisfaction. We liked to say, “Have a drink on me.” But we were not really doing the other people a favor. We were only helping them to get drunk, especially if they happened to be alcoholic. In A.A., we really try to help other alcoholics. We build them up instead of tearing them down. Drinking created a sort of fellowship. But it really was a false fellowship, because it was based on selfishness. We used our drinking companions for our own pleasure. In A.A., we have real fellowship, based on unselfishness and a desire to help each other. And we make real friends, not fair weather friends. With sobriety, have I got everything that drinking’s got, without the headaches?

Meditation for the Day

I know that God cannot teach anyone who is trusting in a crutch. I will throw away the crutch of alcohol and walk in God’s power and spirit. God’s power will so invigorate me that I shall indeed walk on to victory. There is never any limit to God’s power. I will go step by step, one day at a time. God’s will shall be revealed to me as I go forward.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have more and more dependence on God. I pray that I may throw away my alcoholic crutch and let God’s power take its place.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Enjoying Recovery

What a journey!

This process of growth and change takes us along an ever-changing road. Sometimes the way is hard and craggy. Sometimes we climb mountains. Sometimes we slide down the other side on a toboggan.

Sometimes we rest.

Sometimes we grope through the darkness. Sometimes we’re blinded by sunlight.

At times many may walk with us on the road; sometimes we feel nearly alone.

Ever changing, always interesting, always leading someplace better, someplace good.

What a journey!

Today, God, help me relax and enjoy the scenery. Help me know I’m right where I need to be on my journey.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it – what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.

—Carlos Castaneda

Were we offended by someone today? Do we harbor resentment for remarks, oversights, or unpleasant mannerisms? Do we feel tense or uneasy about how someone else has treated us? We can probably make a good case to justify our reactions. Perhaps we are in the right and they are in the wrong.

Yet, even if we are justified, it doesn’t matter. We may be puffing ourselves up and wasting energy. When we are oversensitive, we take a self-righteous position, which leads us far from our path of spiritual awakening. Our strength is diminished.

How much better it is to let go of the lightness, let go of our grandiosity, and accept the imperfections in others. We need to accept our own imperfections too. When we do, we are better men, and our strength and energy can be focused on richer goals. I will accept others’ imperfections; I do not need to be right.

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Elder’s Meditation

“We say there is a right time and place for everything. It’s easy to say, but hard to understand. You have to live it to understand it.”

–Rolling Thunder, CHEROKEE

The Elders tell us there is a right time and a right place. Don’t plant seeds in the fall – wrong time. One way we find out about the right time and right place is our experience. If we are lucky, we have a few friends who will share their experience; this will help us too. The best way is to let God guide us. Only He knows the right time and the right place. So we need to pray and ask Him for guidance.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You might feel trapped in your daily routine. Although travel or other exciting plans may not be realistic at the moment, perhaps changing how you share responsibilities with someone else would make you more comfortable in the meantime. While the perceptive Moon in your 6th House of Duty picks up on subconscious Pluto in your sharing sector, you’re equipped to detect the deeper dynamics involved in the situation. Find a solution that works for both of you rather than against anyone.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 3, 2024

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Daily Reflection

FILLING THE VOID

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. “Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?” As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 47

I was always fascinated with the study of scientific principles. I was emotionally and physically distant from people while I pursued Absolute Knowledge. God and spirituality were meaningless academic exercises. I was a modern man of science, knowledge was my Higher Power. Given the right set of equations, life was merely another problem to solve. Yet my inner self was dying from my outer man’s solution to life’s problems and the solution was alcohol. In spite of my intelligence, alcohol became my Higher Power. It was through the unconditional love which emanated from A.A. people and meetings that I was able to discard alcohol as my Higher Power. The great void was filled. I was no longer lonely and apart from life. I had found a true power greater than myself, I had found God’s love. There is only one equation which really matters to me now: God is in A.A.

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Big Book Quote

“When drinking, or getting over a bout, an alcoholic, sometimes the model of honesty when normal, will do incredible things. Afterward, his revulsion will be terrible. Nearly always, these antics indicate nothing more than temporary conditions.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, To Employers, pg. 140~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

By drinking, we escaped from boredom for a while. We almost forgot our troubles. But when we sobered up, our troubles were twice as bad. Drinking had only made them worse. In A.A., we really escape boredom. Nobody’s bored at an A.A. meeting. We stick around after it’s over and we hate to leave. Drinking gave us a temporary feeling of importance. When we’re drinking, we kid ourselves into thinking we are somebody. We tell tall stories to build ourselves up. In A.A., we don’t want that kind of self-importance. We have real self-respect and honesty and humility. Have I found something much better and more satisfactory than drinking?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that my faith and God’s power can accomplish anything in human relationships. There is no limit to what these two things can do in this field. Only believe, and anything can happen. Saint Paul said, “I can do all things through Him who strengthened me.” All walls that divide you from other human beings can fall by your faith and God’s power. These are the two essentials. Everyone can be moved by these.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to strengthen my faith day by day. I pray that I may rely more and more on God’s power.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Rejecting Shame

Shame can be a powerful force in our life. It is the trademark of dysfunctional families.

Authentic, legitimate guilt is the feeling or thought that what we did is not okay. It indicates that our behavior needs to be corrected or altered, or an amend needs to be made.

Shame is an overwhelming negative sense that who we are isn’t okay. Shame is a no-win situation. We can change our behaviors, but we can’t change who we are. Shame can propel us deeper into self-defeating and sometimes self-destructive behaviors.

What are the things that can cause us to feel shame? We may feel ashamed when we have a problem or someone we love has a problem. We may feel ashamed for making mistakes or for succeeding. We may feel ashamed about certain feelings or thoughts. We may feel ashamed when we have fun, feel good, or are vulnerable enough to show ourselves to others. Some of us feel ashamed just for being.

Shame is a spell others put on us to control us, to keep us playing our part in dysfunctional systems. It is a spell many of us have learned to put on ourselves.

Learning to reject shame can change the quality of our life. It’s okay to be who we are. We are good enough. Our feelings are okay. Our past is okay. It’s okay to have problems, make mistakes, and struggle to find our path. It’s okay to be human and cherish our humanness.

Accepting ourselves is the first step toward recovery. Letting go of shame about who we are is the next important step.

Today, I will watch for signs that I have fallen into shame’s trap. If I get hooked into shame, I will get myself out by accepting myself and affirming that it’s okay to be who I am.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Compassion is … a spirituality and a way of living and walking through life. It is the way we treat all there is in life – ourselves, our bodies, our imaginations and dreams, our neighbors, our enemies… Compassion is a spirituality as if creation mattered. It is treating all creation as holy and as divine… which is what it is.

—Matthew Fox

In our search for growth, serenity, and contentment, we can start at a very practical level. Simply treat ourselves, inside and out, and everything around us in a respectful and caring way. Many men have not learned how to do that. Some of us have learned to accept abuse and pain, or to be tough and abusive.

We can learn about being in a healthy relationship, about befriending ourselves and others and all of creation. With practice, we will learn more and more about having compassion. As we do, our self-centeredness and our self-pity will fall away.

Today, I will be compassionate toward each of the details of creation, and practice acceptance both within and outside myself.

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Elder’s Meditation

“It’s very hard to do things in the right manner, but as long as we do things right, we are in turn with the Great Spirit.”

–Rolling Thunder, CHEROKEE

When we are right with the Great Spirit, we are right with all things. It is impossible to be out of harmony with anything or anybody when we are in harmony with the Great One. So, if during the day a problem crops up and someone makes us mad, the best thing we can do is talk to the Creator first, ask for His help, then continue our conversation with the other person. In this way, our emotional nature will keep aligned with our thoughts, and we will always stay right with the Great Spirit.

Great Spirit, I ask You to guide me on the Red Road today.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your current eagerness to build relationships could come off a little too anxious. While the spontaneous Moon in your 5th House of Self-Expression opposes volatile Uranus in your social 11th house, impulsively sharing something really personal with your peers may not have the outcome you expect. Thankfully, the results aren’t guaranteed to be all bad. As long as you’re tough enough to deal with the possibility of conflict in the moment, taking a risk might plant the seeds of rewarding connections further down the road.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 2, 2024

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Daily Reflection

RESCUED BY SURRENDERING

“Characteristic of the so-called typical alcoholic is a narcissistic egocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence, intent on maintaining at all costs its inner integrity. . . . Inwardly the alcoholic brooks no control from man or God. He, the alcoholic, is and must be the master of his destiny. He will fight to the end to preserve that position.“

— A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 311

The great mystery is: “Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths, fighting to preserve the ‘independence’ of our ego, while others seem to sober up effortlessly in A.A.?” Help from a Higher Power, the gift of sobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop drinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions of the men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reaching out to God and my fellows could I be rescued.

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Big Book Quote

“When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn’t.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, pg. 53~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We got a kick out of the first few drinks, before we got stupefied by alcohol. For a while, the world seemed to look brighter. But how about the letdown, the terrible depression that comes the morning after? In A.A., we get a real kick: not a false feeling of exhilaration, but a real feeling of satisfaction with ourselves, self respect, and a feeling of friendliness toward the world. We got a sort of pleasure from drinking. For a while we thought we were happy. But it’s only an illusion. The hang over the next day is the opposite of plea sure. In A.A., am I getting real pleasure and serenity and peace?

Meditation for the Day

I will practice love, because lack of love will block the way. I will try to see good in all people, those I like and also those who fret me and go against the grain. They are all children of God. I will try to give love; otherwise, how can I dwell in God’s spirit whence nothing unloving can come? I will try to get along with all people, because the more love I give away, the more I will have.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may do all I can to love others, in spite of their many faults. I pray that as I love, so will I be loved.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Trusting Our Higher Power

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him.

—Step Three of Al-Anon

So much talk about a Higher Power, God, as we understand God. So much joy as we come to understand Him. Spirituality and spiritual growth are the foundations of change. Recovery from codependency is not a do-it-yourself task.

Is God a relentless taskmaster? A hardhearted, shaming wizard with tricks up the sleeve? Is God deaf? Uncaring? Haphazard? Unforgiving?

No.

A loving God, a caring God. That is the God of our recovery No more pain than is necessary for usefulness, healing, and cleansing. As much goodness and joy as our heart can hold, as soon as our heart is healed, open, and ready to receive God: approving, accepting, instantly forgiving.

God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day and sometimes big, delightful surprises perfectly timed, perfect for us.

A Master Artist, God will weave together all our joy, sadness and experience to create a portrait of our life with depth, beauty, sensitivity, color, humor, and feeling.

God as we understand Him: A loving God. The God of our recovery.

Today, I will open myself to the care of a loving God. Then, I will let God show me love.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

To be alive is power,Existing in itself,
Without a further function,
Omnipotence enough.

—Emily Dickinson

Being a person, a man, in this world is an amazing gift. A spiritual awakening promised by this program is open to us. But today, not all of us feel powerful and alive. We may feel weak, inadequate to our task, perplexed, or stymied. Is this a day in which we are filled with exuberance for the gift of life? Or is this a day when we’re feeling subdued by life’s burdens?

Perhaps we need to evaluate our perspective. Are we trying to control something or someone? Are we acting as if the world should be as we want rather than as it is? Have our individual wills exceeded their natural bounds and spoiled the simple joy of being “without a further function”?

May I find the pleasure and exuberance today that come with being alive. The simple power to be a person is “omnipotence enough.”

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Elder’s Meditation

“Even the seasons form a great circle in their changing, and always come back again to where they were. The life of a man is a circle from childhood to childhood and so it is everything where power moves.”

–Black Elk (Hehaka sapa), OGLALA SIOUX

In these modern times it is difficult to understand why we should think circles and seasons. People and society are always moving, through distance, over yonder, going here and going there – hurry up, grow up, be successful, climb the ladder of success, etc. The Elders tell us to slow down, to be patient, pray and think circles. Circle thinking applies to relationships, business and every area of our lives. We need to teach our awareness to look for seasons and cycles.

My Creator, teach me the seasons of growth.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

A penetrating conversation could push you to pin down your beliefs today. You might be afraid that committing to a specific position will result in at least some of your peers judging you harshly. Even so, when inquisitive Mercury in your partnership zone nudges vague Neptune in your philosophical 9th house, you may see the advantage in opening up. You can’t be everything to everyone, but defining who you actually are can free you to build an alliance you’ll find fulfilling and productive.

Daily Recovery Readings
February 1, 2024

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Daily Reflection

GOAL: SANITY

“. . . Step Two gently and very gradually began to infiltrate my life. I can’t say upon what occasion or upon what day I came to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I certainly have that belief now.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 27

“Came to believe!” I gave lip service to my belief when I felt like it or when I thought it would look good. I didn’t really trust God. I didn’t believe He cared for me. I kept trying to change things I couldn’t change. Gradually, in disgust, I began to turn it all over, saying: “You’re so omnipotent, you take care of it.” He did. I began to receive answers to my deepest problems, sometimes at the most unusual times: driving to work, eating lunch, or when I was sound asleep. I realized that I hadn’t thought of those solutions—a Power greater than myself had given them to me. I came to believe.

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Big Book Quote

“First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 62~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

When we think about having a drink, we’re thinking of the kick we get out of drinking, the pleasure, the escape from boredom, the feeling of self-importance, and the companionship of other drinkers. What we don’t think of is the letdown, the hang over, the remorse, the waste of money, and the facing of another day. In other words, when we think about that first drink, we’re thinking of all the assets of drinking and none of the liabilities. What has drinking really got that we haven’t got in A.A.? Do I believe that the liabilities of drinking outweigh the assets?

Meditation for the Day

I will start a new life each day. I will put the old mistakes away and start anew each day. God always offers me a fresh start. I will not be burdened or anxious. If God’s forgiveness were only for the righteous and those who had not sinned, where would be its need? I believe that God forgives us all of our sins; if we are honestly trying to live today the way He wants us to live. God forgives us much and we should be very grateful.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that my life may not be spoiled by worry and fear and selfishness. I pray that I may have a glad, thankful, and humble heart.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Step Two

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

—Step Two of Al-Anon

We come to believe in a better life through the powerful gift of other people – hearing them, seeing them, and watching the gift of recovery at work in their lives.

There is a Power greater than us. There is real hope now that things can and will be different and better for our life and us.

We are not in a “do it ourselves” program. We do not have to exert willpower to change. We do not have to force our recovery to happen. We do not have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps just so we believe that there is a Power greater than ourselves – one who will get the job done in our life. This Power will do for us what your greatest and most diligent efforts could not accomplish.

Our Higher Power will restore us to a sane and beneficial life. All we do is believe.

Look. Watch. See the people around you. See the healing they have found. Then discover your own faith, your own belief, your own healing.

Today, regardless of my circumstances, I will believe to the best of my ability that a Power greater than myself can and will restore me to a peaceful, sane way of living. Then I will relax and let Him do that.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults.

—Peter De Vries

Many of us, in entering recovery, are confronted with guilt about our roles as fathers. We can see so clearly with hindsight that we could have been better parents. Others of us recall the unfairness of our own parents and find it hard to forgive them.

This mixture of guilt and resentment is part of the package of recovery. If we remained the same and never learned anything new, we wouldn’t have to feel guilty about the past or face our need to let go of resentments. Our spiritual renewal requires that we forgive ourselves and accept the forgiveness of those around us. Even today our children are not helped by our guilt, but they will be helped – at any age – by our amended lives. And all generations are enriched when we are able to repair broken connections with our parents.

I can accept the increased consciousness that recovery brings without punishing myself for what I didn’t know.

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Elder’s Meditation

“You can’t just sit down and talk about the truth. It doesn’t work that way. You have to live it and be part of it and you might get to know it.”

–Rolling Thunder, CHEROKEE

We all read books that have much information in them. Often we pick up on little sayings that we remember. Inside of us is the little owl, the owl of knowing. It talks to us – guiding us and nurturing us. Often when we get information, it’s hard to live by, but it’s easy to talk about. It’s living the Red Road that counts – Walk the Talk. If we really want freedom in our lives, if we really want to be happy, if we really want to have peace of mind, it’s the truth we must seek.

My Creator, help me in my search for the truth today.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Picking at a loved one has the potential to push them away now. Perhaps you’re motivated by a longing for closeness. That said, criticism, however lovingly meant, isn’t a good way to achieve that. As the nurturing Moon moves into your 5th House of Pleasure, you’ll probably have a better time if you can find something fun to do together. Even a seemingly shallow activity could spark the intimacy you crave, so make an effort to release your expectations and live in the moment.

Daily Recovery Readings
January 31, 2024

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Daily Reflection

OUR COMMON WELFARE COMES FIRST

The unity of Alcoholics Anonymous is the most cherished quality our Society has. . . . We stay whole, or A.A. dies.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 129

Our Traditions are key elements in the ego deflation process necessary to achieve and maintain sobriety in Alcoholics Anonymous. The First Tradition reminds me not to take credit, or authority, for my recovery. Placing our common welfare first reminds me not to become a healer in this program; I am still one of the patients. Self-effacing elders built the ward. Without it, I doubt I would be alive. Without the group, few alcoholics would recover.

The active role in renewed surrender of will enables me to step aside from the need to dominate, the desire for recognition, both of which played so great a part in my active alcoholism. Deferring my personal desires for the greater good of group growth contributes toward A.A. unity that is central to all recovery. It helps me to remember that the whole is greater than the sum of all its parts.

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Big Book Quote

“We have begun to comprehend their futility and their fatality. We have commenced to see their terrible destructiveness. We have begun to learn tolerance, patience and good will toward all men, even our enemies, for we look on them as sick people.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, Pg. 70~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Drinking cuts you off from God. No matter how you were brought up, no matter what your religion is, no matter if you say you believe in God, nevertheless you build up a wall between you and God by your drinking. You know you’re not living the way God wants you to. As a result, you have that terrible remorse. When you come into A.A., you begin to get right with other people and with God. A sober life is a happy life, because by giving up drinking, we’ve got rid of our loneliness and remorse. Do I have real fellowship with other people and with God?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that all sacrifice and all suffering are of value to me. When I am in pain, I am being tested. Can I trust God, no matter how low I feel? Can I say, “Thy will be done,” no matter how much I am defeated? If I can, my faith is real and practical. It works in bad times as well as in good times. The Divine Will is working in a way that is beyond my finite mind to understand, but I can still trust in it.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may take my suffering in my stride. I pray that I may accept pain and defeat as part of God’s plan for my spiritual growth.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Asking for What We Need

One evening, I was alone, weary, and exhausted. I was in the midst of extensive traveling, disconnected from friends and family. I had flown home for the evening, but it seemed like nobody noticed. People were used to me being gone.

It was late at night, and I began arguing with God.

“I’m out there working hard. I’m lonely. I need to know someone cares. You’ve told me to tell you what I need and tonight, God, I particularly need the presence of male energy. I need a friend, someone I can trust to care about me in a nonsexual, nonexploitive way. I need to be held. Now, where are you?”

I lay down on the couch and closed my eyes. I was too tired to do anything but let go.

The telephone rang minutes later. It was a former colleague who had since become my friend. “Hey, kid,” he said. “You sound really tired and needy. Stay right where you are. I’m going to drive out and give you a foot rub. It sounds exactly like what you need.”

Half an hour later, he knocked on my door. He brought a small bottle of oil with him, and gently massaged my feet, gave me a hug, told me how much he cared about me, then left.

I smiled. I had received exactly what I asked for.

It is safe to trust God.

Today, I will remember God cares about what I need, especially if I do.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The body is the soul’s house. Shouldn’t we therefore take care of our house so that it doesn’t fall into ruin?

—Philo Judaeus

Some men think it is a mark of a strong man to abuse his body and pay no heed to his health. Have we done this through drug use or abuse of food? Have we misused our bodies by our sexual behavior? Have we neglected our physical condition or health because of addictions or obsessions with other people?

To end abusive cycles, we need to act in self-respecting ways – sometimes before we feel self-respecting. Recovery and spiritual awakening involve the body, mind, and spirit. We need nutrition, exercise, sleep, and health care. Treating ourselves as worthwhile men helps us feel worthwhile. Tuning in to how we feel physically may give us some direction. As we sense how we feel, do we get some physical messages to guide our recovery?

I will yield to the messages I get from myself so I can enjoy the physical pleasures of recovery and give my soul a better home.

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Elder’s Meditation

“In sharing, in loving all and everything, one people naturally found a due portion of the thing they sought, while in fearing, the other found need of conquest.”

–Chief Luther Standing Bear, SIOUX

There are two systems of thought that are available for us to choose from. One is the love-thought system and the other is the fear- thought system. If we choose love, we will see the laws, principles and values of the Creator. If we choose fear, the results will be so paralyzing that it will cause us to take over and not rely on the Great Spirit. The fear-thought system will automatically cause attack, conflict, need to control over others. The love-thought system seeks peace of mind, unity and causes us to be love seekers.

Great Spirit, today let me see only love.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

A group of people may extend their hand to you, but you might turn it away if you’re not careful. Shyness or exhaustion could have you avoiding large gatherings or spontaneous events. Still, even if introversion is a normal part of your nature, it could be preventing you from going where you want to be. New friends, new lovers, new careers — they all come from meeting new people and putting yourself out there with confidence. Why not go for the gold?

Daily Recovery Readings
January 30, 2024

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Daily Reflection

FREEDOM FROM . . . FREEDOM TO

We are going to know a new freedom. . . .

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 83

Freedom for me is both freedom from and freedom to. The first freedom I enjoy is freedom from the slavery of alcohol. What a relief! Then I begin to experience freedom from fear—fear of people, of economic insecurity, of commitment, of failure, of rejection. Then I begin to enjoy freedom to—freedom to choose sobriety for today, freedom to be myself, freedom to express my opinion, to experience peace of mind, to love and be loved, and freedom to grow spiritually. But how can I achieve these freedoms? The Big Book clearly says that before I am halfway through making amends, I will begin to know a “new” freedom; not the old freedom of doing what I pleased, without regard to others, but the new freedom that allows fulfillment of the promises in my life. What a joy to be free!

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Big Book Quote

“Although financial recovery is on the way for many of us, we found we could not place money first. For us, material well-being always followed spiritual progress; it never preceded.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 127~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

A drinking life isn’t a happy life. Drinking cuts you off from other people and from God. One of the worst things about drinking is the loneliness. And one of the best things about A.A. is the fellowship. Drinking cuts you off from other people, at least from the people who really matter to you, your family, your co-workers, and your real friends. No matter how much you love them, you build up a wall between you and them by your drinking. You’re cut off from any real companionship with them. As a result, you’re terribly lonely. Have I got rid of my loneliness?

Meditation for the Day

I will sometimes go aside into a quiet place of retreat with God. In that place, I will find restoration and healing and power. I will plan quiet times now and then, times when I will commune with God and arise rested and refreshed to carry on the work which God has given me to do. I know that God will never give me a load greater than I can bear. It is in serenity and peace that all true success lies.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may strengthen my inner life so that I may find serenity. I pray that my soul may be restored in quietness and peace.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Religious Freedom

“…a Power greater than ourselves….” “God as we understood Him.” These words introduce spirituality in the Twelve Steps. They are the first two references to God, and they are worded that way for a reason.

We each have the freedom to define, and understand, our Higher Power – God – as we choose.

That means we do not bring our religious affiliation into our recovery groups. It means that we do not try to impose our religious beliefs, or our understanding of God, on anyone else. We do not use our groups or meetings as a soapbox to gain religious converts. We do not try to force the particulars of our religious beliefs on others.

We give each person, the right to a personal understanding of a Higher Power and ourselves.

Today, I will respect other people’s understanding of God, as well as my own. I will not allow others’ judgment of my beliefs to cause me anxiety and distress. I will seek to grow spiritually in recovery, with or without the assistance of a particular religion or denomination.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“Man can live his truth, his deepest truth, but cannot speak it.”

—Archibald MacLeish

For many men, being addicts meant living double lives. There were public selves whom others knew, and private selves whom no one met. It was a compulsive world, and both sides were false. Many of us grew up in addicted families and learned this double life early by hiding from outsiders what life was really like at home.

In this program we learn to live our truth before we can speak it. It is more in our actions than in what we say. We may never know the words for this truth because we do not consciously invent it. It comes to us quietly over time and slowly merges all our parts. Gradually we begin to feel whole again as we surrender our double lives for single, truthful ones.

Let me have the trust to give myself to the work of recovery and follow it where it takes me.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Bright days and dark days were both expressions of the Great Mystery, and the Indian reveled in being close to the Great Holiness.”

–Chief Luther Standing Bear, SIOUX

The Great Spirit created a world of harmony, a world of justice, a world that is interconnected, a balanced world that has positive and negative, this way and that way, up and down, man and woman, boy and girl, honest and dishonest, responsible and irresponsible, day and night. In other words, He created a polarity system. Both sides are to be respected. Both sides or anything are sacred. We need to do good and we need to learn from our mistakes. We need to honor what takes place in the daytime and we need to honor what takes place in the nighttime. We learn that we need to learn and we see what we are supposed to see by staying close to the Great Spirit. We need to be talking to Him all the time, saying “Grandfather, what is it you want me to learn?”

Great Spirit, let me learn today that all things are sacred. Help me stay close to You, my Creator.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your boundaries matter! Think back on any concessions that you made for certain people, whether you cared about them so much that you let them cross your boundaries or you just didn’t want to rock the boat and so repressed your own desires. Today, you deserve to reinstate those boundaries and ensure that you feel secure in your connections. Others involved may not react favorably at first, but you have to center your needs here. No one will maintain your boundaries if you don’t.

Daily Recovery Readings
January 29, 2024

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Daily Reflection

THE JOY OF SHARING

Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89

To know that each newcomer with whom I share has the opportunity to experience the relief that I have found in this Fellowship fills me with joy and gratitude. I feel that all the things described in A.A. will come to pass for them, as they have for me, if they seize the opportunity and embrace the program fully.

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Big Book Quote

“More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn’t deserve it.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 73~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

What a load wasting money puts on your shoulders! They say that members of A.A. have paid the highest initiation fee of any club members in the world, because we’ve wasted so much money on liquor. We’ll never be able to figure out how much it was. We not only wasted our own money, but also the money we should have spent on our families. When you come into A.A., that terrible load of wasted money falls off your shoulders. We alcoholics were getting round-shouldered from carrying all those loads that drinking put on our shoulders. But when we come into A.A., we get a wonderful feeling of release and freedom. Can I throw back my shoulders and look the whole world in the face again?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that the future is in the hands of God. He knows better than I what the future holds for me. I am not at the mercy of fate or buffeted about by life. I am being led in a very definite way, as I try to rebuild my life. I am the builder, but God is the architect. It is mine to build as best I can, under His guidance.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may depend on God, since He has planned my life. I pray that I may live my life, as I believe God wants me to live it.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Going to Meetings

I am still amazed, after years of recovering, at how easily I can begin to talk myself out of attending meetings. I am also still amazed at how good I feel when I go.

—Anonymous

We don’t have to stay stuck in our misery and discomfort. An immediate option is available that will help us feel better: go to a meeting, a Twelve Step support group.

Why resist what can help us feel better? Why sit in our obsession or depression when attending a meeting – even if that means an extra meeting – would help us feel better?

Too busy?
There are 168 hours in each week. Taking one or two hours a week for a meeting can maximize the potential of the remaining 166 hours. If we get into our “codependent stuff,” we can easily spend a majority of our waking hours obsessing, sitting and doing nothing, lying in bed and feeling depressed, or chasing after other people’s needs. Not taking those two hours for a meeting can cause us to waste the remaining hours.

Too tired?
There is nothing as invigorating as getting back on track. Going to a meeting can accomplish that.

Today, I will remember that going to meetings helps.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We grow in time to trust the future for our answers.

—Ruth Benedict

When we first started in recovery, we approached it as we did our codependent and addictive behaviors, wanting to possess it all – quickly and totally – and to do it right. Some of us thought we could learn all we needed to know about recovery in a few weeks. In living with this program, we begin to see we are engaged in a lifelong process. We are in a maturing process and this program is our guide. We can’t rush it or move on to the next stage too soon. An apple tree does not blossom in the fall, and we do not expect the newly forming apples to ripen before they’ve grown.

Our existence in this world is like walking through the woods on a rambling path. We can only see as far ahead as the next bend. We no longer seek some big moment when we finally get the outcome or a “cure” for life’s experiences. The experience along the way is all we need.

Today, I will think about the tasks and rewards of this day and trust the future for what is unanswered.

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Elder’s Meditation

We grieve more because we have been disconnected from our earth, our first Mother, our spiritual Mother.”

–Larry P. Aitken, CHIPPEWA

Where does all life come from? The Earth. Where does everything return to? The Earth. Where do values come from? The Earth. Many people are lost because they don’t know the importance of connection to the Earth. They connect to money, to relationships, to success, to goals. When we are disconnected from the Earth, we have feelings of being sad or lost. When we are connected to the Earth, we feel warm and secure.

Great Spirit, help me to stay connected to the Mother Earth.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You can speak up for other people. In particular, if you notice that someone is being talked over or ignored in a group conversation, take today to be the kind of person who gives them a platform to say what’s on their heart. It might be difficult to interrupt the crowd, especially if it’s a group of popular or higher-ranking people, but it’s important to hear out everyone. Be the friend that they need — you may find that they have amazing things to say.