Daily Recovery Readings
November 23, 2024

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Daily Reflection

“HOLD YOUR FACE TO THE LIGHT”

Believe more deeply. Hold your face up to the Light, even though for the moment you do not see.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 3

One Sunday in October, during my morning meditation, I glanced out the window at the ash tree in our front yard. At once I was overwhelmed by its magnificent, golden color! As I stared in awe at God’s work of art, the leaves began to fall and, within minutes, the branches were bare. Sadness came over me as I thought of the winter months ahead, but just as I was reflecting on autumn’s annual process, God’s message came through. Like the trees, stripped of their leaves in the fall, sprout new blossoms in the spring, I had had my compulsive, selfish ways removed by God in order for me to blossom into a sober, joyful member of A.A. Thank you, God, for the changing seasons and for my ever-changing life.

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Big Book Quote

Many of us keep liquor in our homes. We often need it to carry green recruits through a severe hangover Some of us still serve it to our friends provided they are not alcoholic. But some of us think we should not serve liquor to anyone. We never argue this question. We feel that each family, in the light of their own circumstances, ought to decide for themselves.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 102~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I no longer refuse to do anything because I cannot do it to perfection. Many of us alcoholics use the excuse of not being able to do something perfectly to enable us to do nothing at all. We pretend to be perfectionists. We are good at telling people how a thing should be done, but when we come to the effort of doing it ourselves, we balk. We say to ourselves: “I might make a mistake so I’d better let the whole thing slide.” In A.A. we set our goals high, but that does not prevent us from trying. The mere fact that we will never fully reach these goals does not prevent us from doing the best we can. Have I stopped hiding behind the smoke screen of perfectionism?

Meditation for the Day

“In the world ye shall have tribulation. But be of good cheer. I have overcome the world.” Keep an undaunted spirit. Keep your spirit free and unconquered. You can be undefeated and untouched by failure and all its power, by letting your spirit overcome the world; rise above earth’s turmoil into the secret chamber of perfect peace and confidence. When a challenge comes to you, remember you have God’s help and nothing can wholly defeat you.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have confidence and be of good cheer. I pray that I may not fear the power of failure.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Healthy Sexuality

Many areas of our life need healing.

One important part of our life is our sexuality. Our feelings and beliefs about our sexuality, our ability to nurture, cherish, and enjoy our sexuality, our ability to respect ourselves sexually, our ability to let go of sexual shame and confusion, may all be impaired or confused by our codependency.

Our sexual energy may be blocked. Or for some of us, sex may be the only way we learned to connect with people. Our sexuality may not be connected to the rest of us; sex may not be connected to love – for others or ourselves.

Some of us were sexually abused as children. Some of us may have gotten involved in sexuality addictive behaviors – compulsive sexual behaviors that got out of control and produced shame.

Some of us may have gotten involved in sexual codependency: not paying attention to what we wanted, or didn’t want, sexually; allowing ourselves to get involved sexually because it was what the other person wanted; shutting off our sexuality along with our other feelings; denying ourselves healthy enjoyment of ourselves as sexual beings.

Our sexuality is a part of ourselves that deserves healing attention and energy. It is a part of us that we can allow to become connected to the whole of us; it is a part of us that we can stop being ashamed of.

It is okay and healthy to allow our sexual energy to open up and become healed. It is connected to our creativity and to our heart. We do not have to allow our sexual energy to control our relationships or us. We can establish and maintain healthy, appropriate boundaries around our sexuality. We can discover what that means in our life.

We can enjoy the gift of being human beings who have been given the gift of sexual energy, without abusing or discounting that gift.

Today, I will begin to integrate my sexuality into the rest of my personality. God, help me let go of my fears and shame around my sexuality. Show me the issues I need to face concerning my sexuality. Help me open myself to healing in that area of my life.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We shall not cease from exploration.
And at the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time
—T. S. Eliot

Our spiritual path is like a search leading home. We carry within us a yearning for the ideal, the perfect acceptance and love from our fathers and mothers. We long for fulfillment of our dreams, we long to feel strong and capable, and we want to understand, to truly come into our own.

As we peel back the layers of our defenses, we find what we knew all along. On a deep level, we knew no man could be totally self-sufficient. Now we are coming back to it as if it’s brand new. The best images of our parents’ love and acceptance of us are what we return to as models for how we can be. It is true we can never go home again. Yet our spiritual journey mysteriously leads us back to explore what we knew deeply all along.

I will make peace with my past and explore the deeper knowledge I’ve always held within me.

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Elder’s Meditation

“We’re sitting on our blessed Mother Earth from which we get our strength and determination, love and humility, all the beautiful attributes that we’ve been given. So turn to one another; love one another; respect one another; respect Mother Earth; respect the waters-because that’s life itself!”

–Phil Lane, Sr. YANKTON SIOUX

Our entire point of view can be altered by making one change to align with the principles of the Great Spirit. Let’s say we decide to become respectful. As we become respectful, our attitude will change. We will automatically draw into our lives knowledge about the other principles of the Great Spirit such as love, appreciation, trust, beauty, and peace of mind. By focusing on these principles, we will let go of selfishness, self centeredness, self pity, dishonesty, and fear. You focus on respect, you get respect; you focus on love, you get love; you focus on the Red Road, you get peace of mind.

Great Spirit, let me learn the lessons of respect

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Explaining a complicated topic to others could be necessary now. While the impressionable Moon in your 3rd House of Communication tangles with tough Saturn in your philosophy sector, you may feel obligated to make sure your audience accurately understands every minor detail. At this stage of the process, though, that’s not likely to hold their attention. Make it more like you’re talking to a friend. Lead with the main points, then see if there’s really a reason to get into anything else.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 22, 2024

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Daily Reflection

ONLY TWO SINS

. . . there are only two sins; the first is to interfere with the growth of another human being, and the second is to interfere with one’s own growth.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 542 (Third Edition)

Happiness is such an elusive state. How often do my “prayers” for others involve “hidden” prayers for my own agenda? How often is my search for happiness a boulder in the path of growth for another, or even myself? Seeking growth through humility and acceptance brings things that appear to be anything but good, wholesome and vital. Yet in looking back, I can see that pain, struggles and setbacks have all contributed eventually to serenity through growth in the program.

I ask my Higher Power to help me not cause another’s lack of growth today—or my own.

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Big Book Quote

To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women. Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 33~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I have got rid of most of my boredom. One of the hardest things that a new member of A.A. has to understand is how to stay sober and not be bored. Drinking was always the answer to all kinds of boring people or boring situations. But once you have taken up the interest of A.A., once you have given it your time and enthusiasm, boredom should not be a problem to you. A new life opens up before you that can be always interesting. Sobriety should give you so many new interests in life that you shouldn’t have time to be bored. Have I got rid of the fear of being bored?

Meditation for the Day

“If I have not charity, I am become as sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.” Charity means to care enough about other people to really want to do something for them. A smile, a word of encouragement, a word of love, goes winged on its way, simple though it may seem, while the mighty words of an orator fall on deaf ears. Use up the odd moments of your day in trying to do some little thing to cheer up another person. Boredom comes from thinking too much about yourself.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that my day may be brightened by some little act of charity. I pray that I may try today to overcome the self-centeredness that makes me bored.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

The Magic of Gratitude and Acceptance

Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work.

We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master our present circumstances and then move forward into the next set of circumstances.

If we become stuck, miserable, feeling trapped and hopeless, try gratitude and acceptance. If we have tried unsuccessfully to alter our present circumstances and have begun to feel like we’re beating our head against a brick wall, try gratitude and acceptance.

If we feel like all is dark and the night will never end, try gratitude and acceptance.

If we feel scared and uncertain, try gratitude and acceptance.

If we’ve tried everything else and nothing seems to work, try gratitude and acceptance.

If we’ve been fighting something, try gratitude and acceptance.

When all else fails, go back to the basics.

Gratitude and acceptance work.

Today, God, help me let go of my resistance. Help me know the pain of a circumstance will stop hurting so much if I accept it. I will practice the basics of gratitude and acceptance in my life, and for all my present circumstances.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Without heroes, we are all plain people and don’t know how far we can go.

—Bernard Malamud

It is useful for us to reflect on our heroes for a time. Who do we greatly admire? Are they men or women? Are they closely involved in our lives, or are they distant and beyond our ability to reach on a personal level? Can we feel hopeful and open enough about life to have heroes?

Our heroes inspire us to find the new edges of our growth. We see in another man or woman the qualities and values we admire. We find our own best parts, perhaps partly hidden or undeveloped, in the people we hold as heroes. For example, if we admire a television personality, we can learn about our own values by asking what we admire in him or her. If we admire a friend, we may see a trait we hold dear in ourselves. As we grow and change, our heroes are replaced by others who fit our maturing values.

As I think about people I admire, I learn about myself from them.

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Elder’s Meditation

“It’s the most precious thing…to know absolutely where you belong. There’s a whole emotional wrapping-around-of-you here. You see the same rock, tree, road, clouds, sun — you develop a nice kind of intimacy with the world around you. To be intimate is to grow, to learn…[it] is absolutely fulfilling. Intimacy, that’s my magic word for why I live here.”

–Tessie Maranjo, SANTA CLARA PUEBLO

Every human being, to be mentally healthy, must have the feeling of belonging. When we have a sense of belonging we can be intimate. We can feel. We can connect. If we cannot develop this feeling of belonging, then we will feel lost of disconnected. To be disconnected from life is like walking around during the day not knowing the Sun exists. To have the feelings of intimacy is warm, glowy, joyful, loving, and connected. The feeling this Elder is talking about is available to everyone.

Great Spirit, let me be intimate.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Clearly understanding the structure of one of your close relationships could be comforting today. Still, what works for you and the other person might differ from how your peers handle similar situations. As the sensitive Moon in your self-worth sector fusses at rebellious Uranus in your 11th House of Community, you may find it unsettling to be an outlier. If whatever you’re doing functions in the real world and honors your values, you probably don’t have anything serious to worry about!

Daily Recovery Readings
November 21, 2024

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Daily Reflection

A CLASSIC PRAYER

Lord, make me a channel for thy peace—that where there is hatred, I may bring love—that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness—that where there is discord, I may bring harmony—that where there is error, I may bring truth—that where there is doubt, I may bring faith—that where there is despair, I may bring hope—that where there are shadows, I may bring light—that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted—to understand, than to be understood—to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life. Amen.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 99

No matter where I am in my spiritual growth, the St. Francis prayer helps me improve my conscious contact with the God of my understanding. I think that one of the great advantages of my faith in God is that I do not understand Him, or Her, or It. It may be that my relationship with my Higher Power is so fruitful that I do not have to understand. All that I am certain of is that if I work the Eleventh Step regularly, as best I can, I will continue to improve my conscious contact, I will know His will for me, and I will have the power to carry it out.

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Big Book Quote

“Those of us who have spent much time in the world of spiritual make believe have eventually seen the childishness of it. This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose, accompanied by a growing consciousness of the power of God in our lives. We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.“

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 130~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I no longer waste money, but try to put it to good use. Like all of us, when I was drunk, I threw money around like I really had it. It gave me a feeling of importance – a millionaire for a day. But the morning after, with an empty wallet and perhaps also some undecipherable checks, was a sad awakening. How could I have been such a fool? How will I ever make it up? Thoughts like these get you down. When we are sober, we spend our hard-earned money as it should be spent. Although perhaps some of us could be more generous in our A.A. giving, at least we do not throw it away. Am I making good use of my money?

Meditation for the Day
You were meant to be at home and comfortable in the world. Yet some people live a life of quiet desperation. This is the opposite of being at home and at peace in the world. Let your peace of mind be evident to those around you. Let others see that you are comfortable, and seeing it, know that it springs from your trust in a Higher Power. The dull, hard way of resignation is not God’s way. Faith takes the sting out of the winds of adversity and brings peace even in the midst of struggle.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be more comfortable in my way of living. I pray that I may feel more at home and at peace within myself.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Financial Fears

I sat in the car, looking at the sign on the door of the food shelf office: “Closed until Friday.” It was Wednesday. I had two hungry children and myself; I had no money.

I laid my head on the steering wheel. I couldn’t take it anymore.

I had been so strong, so brave, so trusting for so long. I was a single parent with two children, recently divorced. I had worked so courageously at being grateful for what I had, while setting financial goals and working at believing I deserved the best.

I had put up with so much poverty, so much deprivation. Daily, I worked the Eleventh Step. I worked so hard at praying for knowledge of God’s will for me only, and the power to carry it through. I believed I was doing what I needed to do in my life. I wasn’t lollygagging. I was doing my best, working my hardest.

And there just wasn’t enough money. Life had been a struggle in many ways, but the financial struggle seemed endless.

Money isn’t everything, but it takes money to solve certain problems. I was sick of “letting go” and “letting go” and “letting go.” I was sick of “acting as if” I had enough money. I was tired of having to work so hard daily at letting go of the pain and fear about not having enough. I was tired of working so hard at being happy without having enough. Actually, most of the time I was happy. I had found my soul in poverty. But now that I had my soul and my self, I wanted some money too.

While I sat in the car trying to compose myself, I heard God speak to me in that silent, still voice that whispers gently to our souls.

“You don’t ever have to worry about money again, child. Not unless you want to. I told you that I would take care of you. And I will.”

Great, I thought. Thanks a lot. I believe you. I trust you. But look around. I have no money. I have no food. And the food shelf is closed. You’ve let me down.

Again I heard His voice in my soul: “You don’t have to worry about money again. You don’t have to be afraid. I promised to meet all your needs.

I went home, called a friend, and asked to borrow some money. I hated borrowing, but I had no choice. My breakdown in the car was a release, but it didn’t solve a thing – that day. There was no check in the mailbox.

But I got food for the day. And the next day. And the next. Within six months, my income doubled. Within nine months, it tripled. Since that day, I have had hard times, but I have never had to go without – not for more than a moment in time.

Now, I have enough. Sometimes I still worry about money because that seems to be habitual. But now I know I don’t have to, and I know I never did.

God, help me work hard at what I believe is right for me in my life today, and I’ll trust You for the rest. Help me let go of my fears about money. Help me turn that area over to You. God. Take away the blocks and barriers in my life to financial success.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

For the trouble is that we are self-centered, and no effort of the self can remove the self from the centre of its own endeavor.

—William Temple

This quagmire of troubles we men were caught in came, in part, from our best efforts to be self-sufficient. The harder we worked to provide our own cures, to control others in our lives, or to control ourselves, the more we fixed our attention upon ourselves. We could not see that the answers we were using were actually part of the problem, not the solution. Even today we may be partially caught in the folly of this thinking. Whenever we think we see our problems and the answers clearly but don’t open our incomplete selves to the wisdom of others, we are in danger of intensifying our self-focus. When we have a pattern of telling our fellow members the completed stories of our pain only when our pain has passed, we are maintaining our self-centered system. We can’t lift ourselves out of our self-centeredness. We can only turn it over to our Higher Power and allow ourselves to be released. I am grateful for the healing, which comes when I stop being so self-centered in my efforts.

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Elder’s Meditation

“In the absence of the sacred, nothing is sacred, everything is for sale.”

–Oren Lyons, ONONDAGA

The Elders often say that when something is sacred it has spiritual value. You’ll hear, on the Earth there are sacred spots. You’ll hear, our ceremonies are sacred, our children are sacred, marriage is sacred. When something is sacred it means it’s so holy you can’t attach a value to it. Therefore, it’s not for sale. It’s an insult to suggest buying something sacred. On the other hand, if we look at it differently, as there is no sacred land, ceremonies are not sacred, our children are not sacred, etc., then everything is for sale. Sacredness creates spiritual space. Sacredness makes things holy. Sacredness shows respect for God.

Great Spirit, let me honor things that are sacred

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your practical side is likely to be especially strong at present. With the energetic Sun moving into your responsible and grounded 6th house, you’ll probably find it easier to dive into getting things done instead of spending a lot of time concocting the perfect plan before you start. Others who have a stake in the situation could be impressed by your motivation and effort. When they have visible proof that you’re on their side, they may be inspired to do more themselves!

Daily Recovery Readings
November 20, 2024

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Daily Reflection

“THY WILL, NOT MINE”

. . . when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each one of them this qualification. “. . . if it be Thy will.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 102

I ask simply that throughout the day God place in me the best understanding of His will that I can have for that day, and that I be given the grace by which I may carry it out. As the day goes on, I can pause when facing situations that must be met and decisions that must be made, and renew the simple request: “Thy will, not mine, be done.”

I must always keep in mind that in every situation I am responsible for the effort and God is responsible for the outcome. I can “Let Go and Let God” by humbly repeating: “Thy will, not mine, be done.” Patience and persistence in seeking His will for me will free me from the pain of selfish expectations.

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Big Book Quote

If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 33~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I no longer try to escape life through alcoholism. Drinking built up an unreal world for me and I tried to live in it. But in the morning light the real life was back again and facing it was harder than ever, because I had less resources with which to meet it. Each attempt at escape weakened my personality by the very attempt. Everyone knows that alcohol, by relaxing inhibitions, permits a flight from reality. Alcohol deadens the brain cells that preside over our highest faculties and we are off to the unreal world of drunkenness. A.A. taught me not to run away, but to face reality. Have I given up trying to escape life?

Meditation for the Day

In these times of quiet meditation, try more and more to set your hopes on the grace of God. Know that whatever the future may hold, it will hold more and more of good. Do not set all your hopes and desires on material things. There is weariness in an abundance of things. Set your hopes on spiritual things so that you may grow spiritually. Learn to rely on God’s power more and more and in that reliance you will have an insight into the greater value of the things of the spirit.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that material things may not overwhelm me. I pray that I may realize the higher value of spiritual things.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Wants and Needs

So many of us have been brainwashed to think that we can’t have what we want in life. That is the belief of the martyr. It is born of deprivation and fear.

Identifying what we want and need, then writing it down, sets in motion a powerful chain of events. It indicates that we are taking responsibility for ourselves, giving God and the Universe permission to supply our wants and needs.

The belief that we deserve to have a change in character, a relationship, a new dimension to an existing relationship, a possession, a certain level of health, living, loving, or success, is a powerful force in bringing that desire to pass.

Often, when we realize that we want something, that feeling is God preparing us to receive it!

Listen. Trust. Empower the good in your life by paying attention to what you want and need. Write it down. Affirm it mentally. Pray about it. Then, let it go. Give it to God, and see what happens.

The results may be better than you think.

Today, I will pay attention to what I want and need. I will take time to write it down, and then I will let it go. I will begin to believe I deserve the best.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The most important function of art and science is to awaken the cosmic religious feeling and keep it alive.

—Albert Einstein

There is no need to be concerned about a conflict between science and the spiritual life. People have turned to the spiritual in many ways since the beginning of humanity. Some are tribal and primitive, some very emotional, some focused on ideas and philosophy, some centered on tradition. Perhaps in the very center of our humanness is a spiritual compass. When we disown that orientation, do we lose some of our humanness? This program did not invent the spiritual outlook. It only tells us recovery will come through awakening of the spiritual within us.

We are on an exploration. We give ourselves over to it and only discover where our awakening will lead as it unfolds. The Steps tell us to engage with the God of our understanding, to develop a relationship of trust, total openness and humility, and to improve the contact. As the center of our humanness is restored, we come alive and our daily tasks take on new meaning.

May I be awakened again to that cosmic feeling we all inherit.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Money cannot buy affection.”

–Mangas Coloradas, APACHE

In these modern times we put too much emphasis on material things and on money. We believe that money is power. If we have money, people will respect us. If we have money, people will admire us. If we have money, we can have anything we want. Maybe we can purchase anything in the material world, but we cannot purchase anything in the Unseen World. The Unseen World is not for sale. It can only be given away. Love, affection, admiration, trust, respect, commitment — these must be earned or given away. If we use these things from the Unseen World, we are using real power.

My Creator, let me demonstrate Your power today. Let me be loving to all I meet.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Impulse purchases could be difficult to resist today. As the needy Moon in your personal finance zone chafes under the withering gaze of stubborn Pluto in your 8th House of Big Money, you may feel like your ability to make major decisions is constrained by some outside circumstance you can’t control. Why not assert yourself in any way you still can? Consider that, even when you’re genuinely stuck with the overall situation for a while, you’ll potentially adapt to it better over time.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 19, 2024

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Daily Reflection

“I WAS SLIPPING FAST”

We A.A.’s are active folk, enjoying the satisfactions of dealing with the realities of life, . . . So it isn’t surprising that we often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something not really necessary.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96

I had been slipping away from the program for some time, but it took a death threat from a terminal disease to bring me back, and particularly to the practice of the Eleventh Step of our blessed Fellowship. Although I had fifteen years of sobriety and was still very active in the program, I knew that the quality of my sobriety had slipped badly. Eighteen months later, a checkup revealed a malignant tumor and a prognosis of certain death within six months. Despair settled in when I enrolled in a rehab program, after which I suffered two small strokes which revealed two large brain tumors. As I kept hitting new bottoms I had to ask myself why this was happening to me. God allowed me to recognize my dishonesty and to become teachable again. Miracles began to happen. But primarily I relearned the whole meaning of the Eleventh Step. My physical condition has improved dramatically, but my illness is minor compared to what I almost lost completely.

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Big Book Quote

Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 62~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In A.A. we do not speak much of sex. And yet putting sex in its proper place in our lives is one of the rewards that have come to us as a result of our new way of living. The Big Book says that many of us needed an overhauling there. It also says that we subjected each sex relation to this test – was it selfish or not? “We remembered always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly, nor to be despised or loathed.” We can ask God to mold our ideals and to help us to live up to them. We can act accordingly. Have I got my sex life under proper control?

Meditation for the Day

“I will lift up my eyes unto the heights whence cometh my help.” Try to raise your thoughts from the depths of the sordid and mean and impure things of the earth to the heights of goodness and decency and beauty. Train your insight by trying to take the higher view. Train it more and more until distant heights become more familiar. The heights of the Lord, whence cometh your help, will become nearer and dearer and the false values of the earth will seem farther away.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not keep my eyes forever downcast. I pray that I may set my sights on higher things.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Accepting Our Feelings

Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions, especially concerning other people? They are only feelings!

In the course of a day, we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to someone who is selling us a service.

We may deny that we feel frustrated, angry, or hurt in reaction to a friend.

We may deny feelings of fear, or anger, toward our children.

We may deny a whole range of feelings toward our spouse or the person with whom we’re in a love relationship.

We may deny feelings provoked by people we work for, or by people who work for us.

Sometimes the feelings are a direct reaction to others. Sometimes people trigger something deeper – an old sadness or frustration.

Regardless of the source of our feelings, they are still our feelings. We own them. And acceptance is often all that is necessary to make them go away.

We don’t have to let our feelings control our behavior. We don’t have to act on each feeling that passes through us. We do not need to indulge in inappropriate behavior.

It does help to talk about our feelings with someone we trust. Sometimes we need to bring our feelings to the person who is triggering them. That can breed intimacy and closeness. But the most important person we need to tell is ourselves. If we allow our feelings to pass through us, accept them, and release them, we shall know what to do next.

Today, I will remember that feelings are an important part of my life. I will be open to my feelings in family life, in friendships, in love, and at work. I will feel my feelings without judging myself.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Archie Bunker: What’s wrong with revenge? That’s a perfect way to get even.

—Norman Lear

When we are locked within negative, hostile thinking patterns, we go around in mental circles. What seems perfectly rational to us at the time looks misguided and blind when we look back. Carrying a grudge or a desire to get even with someone is a cancer inside us. It belittles us and holds back our spirit.

We break through our mental circles by revealing our anger to others. We talk with other recovering men and let them know the details of our resentments. We listen to their experiences and apply them in our program. As long as we keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves, we only recycle the same thinking system. When we take the risk and talk to friends, we build bridges that bring in new ideas.

I will not harbor my resentments within myself. I will talk with a trusted friend so I can learn to let them go.

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Elder’s Meditation

Where there is vision, the people live. They are made rich in the things of the spirit; and then, as the logical next step, they are rich in human life.

–Phil Lane, Sr., YANKTON SIOUX

Since the beginning of time, Indian people have been blessed with the ability and knowledge of the vision. The vision determines our future. The concept is, we move toward and become that which we think about. We have known that all visions are about the Great Spirit. They should include God’s will in every area of our lives. We should have visions about our people, about healthy relationships, about helping others, about being happy, about being educated. Each day we should renew our vision. We should ask the Creator to give us a vision of what He wants us to be and where He wants us to go in our lives. We should be the seekers of vision.

Great Spirit, give me a vision to follow today. Let me do Your will.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Getting along with others could seem especially complicated today. As unconscious Pluto passes into your 8th House of Intimacy, you’ll need to question what’s gone unspoken between you and all of your close associations, regardless of the type of relationship. The hard part for you might involve learning to be in charge when you need to be. Maybe you find it easier to see yourself as vulnerable and therefore not responsible. Stay tethered to what works on a practical level.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 18, 2024

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Daily Reflection

A SAFETY NET

Occasionally. . . . We are seized with a rebellion so sickening that we simply won’t pray. When these things happen we should not think too ill of ourselves. We should simply resume prayer as soon as we can, doing what we know to be good for us.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105

Sometimes I scream, stomp my feet, and turn my back on my Higher Power. Then my disease tells me that I am a failure, and that if I stay angry I’ll surely get drunk. In those moments of self-will it’s as if I’ve slipped over a cliff and am hanging by one hand. The above passage is my safety net, in that it urges me to try some new behavior, such as being kind and patient with myself. It assures me that my Higher Power will wait until I am willing once again to risk letting go, to land in the net, and to pray.

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Big Book Quote

When people presented us with spiritual approaches, how frequently did we all say, “I wish I had what that man has. I’m sure it would work if I could only believe as he believes. But I cannot accept as surely true the many articles of faith which are so plain to him.” So it was comforting to learn that we could commence at a simpler level.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, pg. 47~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I have gotten over my procrastination. I was always putting things off till tomorrow and as a result they never got done. “There is always another day” was my motto instead of “Do it now.” Under the influence of alcohol, I had grandiose plans. When I was sober I was too busy getting over my drunk to start anything. “Some day I’ll do that” – but I never did it. In A.A. I have learned that it’s better to make a mistake once in a while than to never do anything at all. We learn by trial and error. But we must act now and not put it off until tomorrow. Have I learned to do it now?

Meditation for the Day

“Do not hide your light under a bushel. Arise and shine, for the light has come and the glory of the Lord is risen in thee.” The glory of the Lord shines in the beauty of your character. It is risen in you, even though you can realize it only in part. “Now you see as in a glass darkly, but later you will see face to face.” The glory of the Lord is too dazzling for mortals to see fully on earth. But some of this glory is risen in you when you try to reflect that light in your life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to be a reflection of the Divine Light. I pray that some of its rays may shine in my life.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Allowing Ourselves to be Nurtured

Let yourself be nurtured and loved. Let people be there for you. Allow yourself to be held when it would feel good. Let someone listen to you, support and encourage you when you need that. Receive comfort from someone’s physical presence when you need that. Allow yourself to be supported emotionally and cared about.

For too long, we’ve stood in the background, attending to the needs of others and claiming we have no needs of our own. We’ve shut off, for to long, the part of us that longs to be nurtured.

It is time, now, to claim those needs, to identify them, and to understand that we deserve to have them met.

What are our needs? What would feel good? What kinds of ways would we like others to nurture and support us? The clearer we can be about our needs, the greater the possibility they will be met.

Hugs. A listening ear. Support. Encouragement. The physical and emotional presence of people who care about us. Doesn’t that sound good? Tempting?

Someone once said to me, “The eighties have been a ‘me’ decade. Now, maybe the nineties can be a ‘you’ decade.”

My reply was immediate. “Let’s make the nineties a ‘me’ and ‘you’ decade.”

No matter how long we’ve been recovering, we never outgrow our need for nurturing and love.

Today, I will open to recognizing my needs for nurturing. I will be open to the needs of those around me too. I can begin taking a nurturing, loving attitude toward myself and by taking responsibility for my needs in relationships.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

I always entertain great hopes.

—Robert Frost

In our honest journey, we must admit life is often difficult and painful. But these facts do not describe all of life, and they do not determine how we respond. The sun rises warm and bright after a cold and dark night. The open, generous smile of a small child reaches into the soft part of us all. To be strong and hardy men on this spiritual path, we must be truthful about the pain and unfairness in life while holding firmly to a belief in all the generous possibilities.

Surrendering to despair, we trade the uncertainty of options for the certainty of gloom. Then we might say, “At least I’m never disappointed this way.” Life isn’t filled only with difficulty and pain. It is also filled with people whose dignity and spirit rise above their circumstances. There are situations when great sacrifice or love and wisdom turn a problem into an opportunity and strength. If we look at what has happened in our own lives and in those of others, we have ample reason to hope.

My own experience in recovery gives me great hope in what can be.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Power is not manifested in the human being. True power is in the Creator.”

–Oren Lyons, ONONDAGA

The Old Ones say the only true power is spiritual power. Sometimes our egos tell us we have power but really we don’t. Great Spirit power is called by other names such as love, forgiveness, intelligence, life, principles, and laws. When the Creator uses this power to make the human being powerful, we must stay humble. We should constantly acknowledge that we are who we are. We do what we do because of the power of the Great One.

Great One, guide me to use Your power well. I will use it only to serve the people.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Going on a fantasy adventure could rejuvenate you now. Enjoying a book or movie can show you possibilities that aren’t readily available in your routine. Even if the story has a mythical setting, there’s probably an underlying energy that you should try to integrate. While detail-oriented Mercury in your practical 6th house opposes grandiose Jupiter in your fantasy zone, maybe you need a chance to feel more heroic. Doing the right thing doesn’t always look dramatic, but recognize it when you do it.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 17, 2024

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Daily Reflection

OVERCOMING LONELINESS

Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn’t quite belong.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 90

The agonies and the void that I often felt inside occur less and less frequently in my life today. I have learned to cope with solitude. It is only when I am alone and calm that I am able to communicate with God, for He cannot reach me when I am in turmoil. It is good to maintain contact with God at all times, but it is absolutely essential that, when everything seems to go wrong, I maintain that contact through prayer and meditation.

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Big Book Quote

We meet frequently so that newcomers may find the fellowship they seek.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 15~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Everyone has two personalities, a good and a bad. We are all dual personalities to some extent. When we were drinking, the bad personality was in control. We did things when we were drunk that we would never do when we were sober. When we sober up, we are different people. Then we wonder how we could have done the things we did. But we drink again, and again our bad side comes out. So we are back and forth, always in conflict with our other selves, always in a stew. This division of our selves is not good; we must somehow become unified. We do this by giving ourselves wholeheartedly to A.A. and to sobriety. Have I become unified?

Meditation for the Day

“Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of Thy Lord.” These words are for many ordinary people, whom the world may pass by, unrecognizing. Not to the world-famed, the proud, the wealthy, are these words spoken, but to the quiet followers who serve God unobtrusively yet faithfully, who bear their crosses bravely and put a smiling face to the world. “Enter into the joy of Thy Lord.” Pass into that fuller spiritual life, which is a life of joy and peace.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not desire the world’s applause. I pray that I may not seek rewards for doing what I believe is right.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Grief and Action

Trust in God and do something.

—Mary Lyon

It’s important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow. But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain.

There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circumstance long enough. It becomes time to break out. It comes time to take action.

We will know when it’s time to break the routine of grieving. There will be signs within and around us. We will become tired of the heaviness. An idea will occur; an opportunity will present itself. We may think: No. Too much effort… Do it anyway. Try something. Reach out. Stretch. Do something unusual, something different, and something special.

A new activity may help trigger the transformation process. Stay up two hours later than usual! Make an appointment to do something for yourself that is different from what you usually do. Visit someone you haven’t seen in years. Do something to encourage and help the new energy coming your way.

We may not feel like breaking out of grief. It may feel safer, easier, to remain in our cocoon. Begin pushing out anyway.

Test the walls of your cocoon. Push. Push a little harder. It may be time to emerge.

Today, I will trust God and the process, but I will also take action to help myself feel better.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

You cannot devalue the body and value the soul – or value anything else. The isolation of the body sets it into direct conflict with everything else in creation.

—Wendell Berry

Our bodies are part of creation as much as trees, lakes, mountains, flowers, and animals. Part of our growth into full manhood is treating ourselves respectfully. It is a spiritual practice to be fully accepting, active, and alive physically.

We can no longer be content to be only spectator sportsmen in front of the televisIon set. We need to get our own muscles moving. What we take in as food expresses the level of respect we feel for ourselves. Our sexual expressions reflect the value we feel for our own bodies and our partners’. Our spiritual feelings become part of all the basic details of our lives.

Today, I stand in God’s creation as a physical body. My spiritual experience includes all the ways I care for and accept my body.

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Elder’s Meditation

Humbleness means peace and honesty — both mean Hopi. True, honest, perfect words — that’s what we call Hopi words. In all languages, not just in Hopi. We strive to be Hopi. We call ourselves Hopi because maybe one or two of us will become Hopi. Each person must look into their heart and make changes so that you may become Hopi when you reach your destination.”

–Percy Lomaquahu, HOPI

The Creator has made available to us all the laws, principles and values which we need to know to live in harmony. The Creator also designed each human being to learn and grow by trial and error. We have tools to help us live the right way. We have prayers, visions, nature, teachers, Elders, and we have the Great Spirit to talk to and ask for help when we have problems. We also have choice. To walk the Red Road takes courage and a lot of prayer.

Creator, give me courage to walk the Red Road.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You’re likely to be nourished by rest, peace, and quiet at the moment. As the mellow Moon in your 12th House of Contemplation challenges whirlwind Mercury in your responsible 6th house, you might worry that taking the break you need will put you too far behind on your to-do list. If you’ve been stuck on a particular task for a while, trying one more time to do it the usual way won’t necessarily help. Give yourself the space to let an alternative approach surface.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 16, 2024

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Daily Reflection

A DAILY REPRIEVE

What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85

Maintaining my spiritual condition is like working out every day, planning for the marathon, swimming laps, jogging. It’s staying in good shape spiritually, and that requires prayer and meditation. The single most important way for me to improve my conscious contact with a Higher Power is to pray and meditate. I am as powerless over alcohol as I am to turn back the waves of the sea; no human force had the power to overcome my alcoholism. Now I am able to breathe the air of joy, happiness and wisdom. I have the power to love and react to events around me with the eyes of a faith in things that are not readily apparent. My daily reprieve means that, no matter how difficult or painful things appear today, I can draw on the power of the program to stay liberated from my cunning, baffling and powerful illness.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals usually brief were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 30~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I have got rid of most of my inner conflicts. I was always at war with myself. I was doing things that I did not want to do. I was waking up in strange places and wondering how I got there. I was full of recklessness when I was drunk and full of remorse when I was sober. My life didn’t make sense. It was full of broken resolves and frustrated hopes and plans. I was getting nowhere fast. No wonder my nerves were all shot. I was bumping up against a blank wall and I was dizzy from it. A.A. taught me how to get organized and to stop fighting against myself. Have I got rid of inner conflicts?

Meditation for the Day

“When two or three are gathered together in My name, there am I in the midst of them.” The spirit of God comes upon His followers when they are all together at one time, in one place, and with one accord. When two or three consecrated souls are together at a meeting place, the spirit of God is there to help and guide them. Where any sincere group of people are together, reverently seeking the help of God, His power and His spirit are there to inspire them.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be in accord with the members of my group. I pray that I may feel the strength of a consecrated group.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

The Victim Trap

The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr.

We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves.

We aren’t helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power – not to change or control others, but to solve the problems that are ours to solve.

Using each problem that comes our way to “prove” that life is hard and we are helpless – this is codependency. It’s the victim trap.

Life does not have to be difficult. In fact, it can be smooth. Life is good. We don’t have to “awfulize” it, or ourselves. We don’t have to live on the underside.

We do have power, more power than we know, even in the difficult times. And the difficult times don’t prove life is bad; they are part of the ups and downs of life; often, they work out for the best.

We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances.

Life is challenging. Sometimes, there’s more pain than we asked for; sometimes, there’s more joy than we imagined.

It’s all part of the package, and the package is good.

We are not victims of life. We can learn to remove ourselves as victims of life. By letting go of our belief that life has to be hard and difficult, we make our life much easier.

Today, God, help me let go of my belief that life is so hard, so awful, or so difficult. Help me replace that belief with a healthier, more realistic view.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

A wise man never loses anything if he have himself.

—Montaigne

As recovering men, perhaps we have learned more fully what it means to have ourselves because we know the extremes of losing ourselves. In the past we weren’t honest with others, or ourselves; we didn’t have our self-respect, and our compulsive actions violated our values. In that condition, we were incapable of believing in ourselves or of standing up for ourselves. Some of us felt like phonies or nobodies.

In this program we pray for wisdom, and it comes to us as we take possession of ourselves. We develop a better match between our inner feelings and our outer actions. We become willing to make choices, and we are able to take a stand based on our personal feelings and hunches. The things we possess like our gadgets, our cars, or our audio equipment are just temporary. Our integrity, our selves, can never be taken from us.

Today, I am grateful for the growing feeling within that who I am and what I believe is acceptable to me.

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Elder’s Meditation

“We do not want riches, but we want to train our children right. Riches would do us no good. We could not take them with us to the other world. We do not want riches, we want peace and love.”

–Red Cloud, OGLALA LAKOTA

The Elders say that what is important is peace and love. To have material things is okay, but if not, that’s okay too. To have peace and love is more important than anything material. Our children will see the value of peace and love only if adults show they are a priority. Too often we think we can offer material things and they will replace the time spent with our children. But the most important way to give our children peace and love is to spend time with them.

My Creator, give me Your peace and love today.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your friends could presently be trying to lure you toward more excitement than you would otherwise choose to pursue. As the beaming Sun in your playful 5th house conflicts with visionary Uranus in your 11th House of Community, you’re likely just here to have a good time, while they want to change the world. If you truly aren’t up for their proposed activity, it’s okay to decline the invite and do your own thing. They deserve collaborators who are all in on their revolutionary zeal!

Daily Recovery Readings
November 15, 2024

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Daily Reflection

VITAL SUSTENANCE

Those of us who have come to make regular use of prayer would no more do without it than we would refuse air, food, or sunshine. And for the same reason. When we refuse air, light, or food, the body suffers. And when we turn away from meditation and prayer, we likewise deprive our minds, our emotions, and our intuitions of vitally needed support.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 97

Step Eleven doesn’t have to overwhelm me. Conscious contact with God can be as simple, and as profound, as conscious contact with another human being. I can smile. I can listen. I can forgive. Every encounter with another is an opportunity for prayer, for acknowledging God’s presence within me.

Today I can bring myself a little closer to my Higher Power. The more I choose to seek the beauty of God’s work in other people, the more certain of His presence I will become.

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Big Book Quote

It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us. But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out this physical factor is incomplete.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Doctor’s Opinion, pg. xxvi~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

I am less sensitive and my feelings are less easily hurt. I no longer take myself so seriously. It didn’t used to take much to insult me, to feel that I had been slighted or left on the outside. What happens to me now is not so important. One cause of our drinking was that we couldn’t take it, so we escaped the unpleasant situation. We have learned to take it on the chin if necessary and smile. When I am all wrapped up in A.A., I do not notice the personal slights so much. They do not seem to matter so much. I have learned to laugh at self-pity because it’s so childish. Am I less sensitive?

Meditation for the Day

God’s miracle-working power is as manifest today as it was in the past. It still works miracles of change in lives and miracles of healing in twisted minds. When a person trusts wholly in God and leaves to Him the choosing of the day and hour, there is God’s miracle-working power becoming manifest in that person’s life. So we can trust in God and have boundless faith in His power to make us whole again, whenever he chooses.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may feel sure that there is nothing that God cannot accomplish in changing my life. I pray that I may have faith in His miracle-working power.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Benefits of Recovery

There are two benefits from recovery: we have short-term gains and long-term gains.

The short-term gains are the things we can do today that help us feel better immediately.

We can wake up in the morning, read for a few minutes in our meditation book, and feel lifted. We can work a Step and often notice an immediate difference in the way we feel and function. We can go to a meeting and feel refreshed, talk to a friend and feel comforted, or practice a new recovery behavior, such as dealing with our feelings or doing something good for ourselves, and feel relieved.

There are other benefits from recovery, though, that we don’t see immediately on a daily or even a monthly basis. These are the long-term gains, the larger progress we make in our life.

Over the years, we can see tremendous rewards. We can watch ourselves grow strong in faith, until we have a daily personal relationship with a Higher Power that is as real to us as a relationship with a best friend.

We can watch ourselves grow beautiful as we shed shame, guilt, resentments, self-hatred, and other negative buildups from our past.

We can watch the quality of our relationships improve with family, friends, and spouses. We find ourselves growing steadily and gradually in our capacity to be intimate and close, to give and receive.

We can watch ourselves grow in our careers, in our ability to be creative, powerful, productive people, using our gifts and talents in a way that feels good and benefits others.

We discover the joy and beauty in ourselves, others, and life.

The long-term progress is steady, but sometimes slow, happening in increments and often with much forward and backward movement. Enough days at a time of practicing recovery behaviors and piling up short term gains leads to long-term rewards.

Today, I will be grateful for the immediate and long-term rewards of recovery. If I am new to recovery, I will have faith that I can achieve the long-term benefits. If I’ve been recovering for a while, I will pause to reflect, and be grateful for my overall progress.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

To wait for moments or places where no pain exists, no separation is felt and where all human restlessness has turned into inner peace is waiting for a dream world.

—Henri J. M. Nouwen

Anytime we do a spot check on our anxiety or personal restlessness we will probably find some. As long as we are aware and alive we can expect to have some discomfort, some fear of loss, some doubt. Our program does not totally rid us of these pains. Perhaps our old ways sought absolute peace or escape through abuse of chemicals or food or gambling or sex, but the serenity we seek in our recovery comes through honesty with ourselves and acceptance of the incompleteness of our lives.

When we make room for the pain in our lives, we allow the river of our emotions to flow. It will carry us along to other feelings like happiness and peace. Conflicting feelings can exist side by side in our lives, and when we try to control true feelings of restlessness or pain, we dam the flow of emotions and block the pleasant ones as well as the difficult ones.

I am moving to a real world where I know and accept my feelings.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Our Spiritual belief is that we were created as part of the land – so our identity, our names, and our songs are all tied to the land.”

–Chief Roderick Robinson, NISGA’A

In the traditional way, the names of native people had great meaning. We even had naming ceremonies. The naming of someone was very important and had great significance because it was tied to the Earth. The identity of each member and the teachings of the songs were all tied to Mother Earth. We need to know these teachings from our culture. This knowledge will help us heal the people.

My Maker, today help me find my identity.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You might currently be ready to let your friends know about an interesting subject you’ve been studying lately. Watch out — you’re not guaranteed to like everything you hear in response! Still, as logical Saturn turns direct in your 9th House of Research, this could be a useful reality check. Despite any ignorant comments you receive, there are also potentially a few legitimate questions you ought to answer. Sweeping them under the rug now may only cause bigger problems for you later.

Daily Recovery Readings
November 14, 2024

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Daily Reflection

INTUITION AND INSPIRATION

. . . we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 86

I invest my time in what I truly love. Step Eleven is a discipline that allows me and my Higher Power to be together, reminding me that, with God’s help, intuition and inspiration are possible. Practice of the Step brings on selflove. In a consistent attempt to improve my conscious contact with a Higher Power, I am subtly reminded of my unhealthy past, with its patterns of grandiose thinking and false feelings of omnipotence. When I ask for the power to carry out God’s will for me, I am made aware of my powerlessness. Humility and a healthy selflove are compatible, a direct result of working Step Eleven.

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Big Book Quote

Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kill us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 62~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

A better way than judging people is to look for all the good in them. If you look hard enough and long enough, you ought to be able to find some good in every person. In A.A. I learned that my job was to try to bring out the good, not criticize the bad. Every alcoholic is used to being judged and criticized. That has never helped anyone to get sober. In A.A. we tell people they can change. We try to bring out the best in them. We encourage their good points and ignore their bad points. People are not converted by criticism. Do I look for the good in people?

Meditation for the Day

There must be a design for the world in the mind of God. We believe His design for the world is a universal fellowship of men and women under the fatherhood of God. The plan for your life must also be in the mind of God. In times of quiet meditation you can seek for God’s guidance, for the revealing of God’s plan for your day. Then you can live this day according to that guidance. Many people are not making of their lives what God meant them to be, and so they are unhappy. They have missed the design for their lives.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to follow God’s design for today. I pray that I may have the sense of Divine Intent in what I do today.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Letting Our Anger Out

It’s okay to be angry, but it isn’t healthy to be resentful. Regardless of what we learned as children, no matter what we saw role modeled, we can learn to deal with our anger in ways that are healthy for us and for those around us. We can have our angry feelings. We can connect with them, own them, and feel them, express them, release them, and be done with them.

We can learn to listen to what anger is telling us about what we want and need in order to take care of ourselves.

Sometimes we can even indulge in angry feelings that aren’t justified. Feelings are just feelings; there is no morality in the feeling, only in our behavior. We can feel angry without hurting or abusing others or ourselves. We can learn to deal with anger in ways that benefit our relationships instead of ways that harm them.

If we don’t feel our angry feelings today, we will need to face them tomorrow.

Today, I will let myself feel my anger. I will express my anger appropriately, without guilt. Then I will be done with it.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

No one can get rid of the spirit of judgment by an effort of the will.

—Paul Tournier

In the past, we applied our wills and tried to bring about the changes we wanted. We may still unconsciously try to create self-improvement by an effort of will. But, as long as we do that, we continue the same circles of frustration and defeat we knew before recovery. The way to growth is in directions we cannot fully imagine for ourselves. We can become ready for change and then pray for help. The man who simply became ready to have God remove his judgmental attitudes was surprised to find God’s answer was to make him more trusting of others and less judgmental of himself.

The wonders of recovery are miracles because we tried before and couldn’t recover by ourselves. Miracles are surprises that come upon us because God’s will for us is more creative and far reaching in its renewal than anything we can think of.

Today, I pray that I may know the will of God and forgo my limited willfulness.

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Elder’s Meditation

“The hearts of little children are pure, and therefore, the Great Spirit may show to them many things which older people miss.”

–Black Elk (Hehaka Sapa) OGLALA LAKOTA

Sometimes adults think they know more than the children. But the children are closer to the truth. Have you ever noticed how quickly they can let go of resentments? Have you ever noticed how free they are of prejudice? Have you ever noticed how well the children listen to their bodies? Maybe adults need to be more like children. They are so innocent. The children pray to the Creator and trust that He will take care of them.

Grandfather, today let the children be my teacher.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

 Improving your long-term finances might currently be a high priority for you. While pleasure planet Venus in your relationship sector challenges ambitious Mars in your 2nd House of Resources, a companion who’s more interested in enjoying the moment could seem to hold you back from this goal. You don’t have to give in to every request they make, but it’s potentially worthwhile to consider the idea that you’re being too rigid. Protecting your future matters, but enjoying the journey there also has its place.