Daily Recovery Readings
September 10, 2024

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Daily Reflection

RECOVERY BY PROXY?

They [the Promises] will always materialize if we work for them.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84

Sometimes I think: “Making these amends is going too far! No one should have to humble himself like that!” However, it is this very humbling of myself that brings me that much closer to the sunlight of the spirit. A.A. is the only hope I have if I am to continue healing and gain a life of happiness, friendship and harmony.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Imagine life without faith! Were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldn’t be life.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, pg. 54~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Here are answers to the question of how a person can live without liquor and be happy: “The things we put in place of drinking are more than substitutes for it. One is the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. In this company, you find release from care, boredom, and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Among other A.A.s you will make lifelong friends. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties.” Does life mean something to me now?

Meditation for the Day

Do you want the full and complete satisfaction that you find in serving God and all the satisfactions of the world also? It is not easy to serve both God and the world. It is difficult to claim the rewards of both. If you work for God, you will still have great rewards in the world. But you must be prepared to sometimes stand apart from the world. You cannot always turn to the world and expect all the rewards which life has to offer. If you are trying sincerely to serve God, you will have other and greater rewards than the world as to offer.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not expect too much from the world. I pray that I may also be content with the rewards that come from serving God.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Self-approval

Most of us want to be liked. We want other people to think of us as nice, friendly, kind, and loving. Most of us want the approval of others.

Since childhood, some of us have been trying to get approval, trying to get people to like us and think highly of us. We may be afraid people will leave us if they disapprove of our actions. We may look for approval from people who have none to give. We may not know that we’re lovable now and can learn to approve of ourselves.

In order to live happily, to live consistently with the way our Higher Power wants us to live, and to tap into a way of life that is in harmony with the universe, we need to let go of our extreme need for approval. These unmet needs for approval and love from our past give others control over us today. These needs can prevent us from acting in our best interest and being true to ourselves.

We can approve of ourselves. In the end, that’s the only approval that counts.

Today, I will let go of my need for approval and my need to be liked. I will replace them with a need to like and approve of myself. I will enjoy the surprise I find when I do this. The people who count, including myself, will respect me when I am true to myself.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

It is not a question of how a husband and wife can be equal and alike. But rather, it is a problem of how a couple can be equal and different.

—Pierre Mornell

In seeking closeness with loved ones, we have often made the mistake of looking only for similarities. Although common ground helps understanding, we must learn how to get close to others by “borrowing their eyes and ears.” We expand our understanding of others by accepting that what we see, hear, think, and feel will not be exactly what anyone else does. We can deepen our relationships by exchanging our experiences with others.

We don’t have to agree on everything. Simply learning about each other’s differences and letting each other know that we hear and understand will create a feeling of intimacy.

I will be receptive and appreciate differences in those I love.

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Elder’s Meditation

“One of the first things Seneca children learned was that thy might create their own world, their own environment, by visualizing actions and desires in prayer. The Senecas believed that everything that made life important came from within. Prayer assisted in developing a guideline toward discipline and self control.”

–Twylah Nitcsh, SENECA

All permanent and lasting change starts first on the inside and works its way out. Having constant prayer and Creator directed visions helps us to live in harmony. This is the best way to grow strong and become a Warrior. No matter what is going on outside of ourselves, it is our projection that makes it so. It is our projections that even give it any meaning. Another way is each day to turn our life and our will over to the care of the Great Spirit. Then He will show us His desire for us. When we are in alignment to His desire, we become very joyful and very happy.

Oh Great Spirit, You take care of me today and tell me what I can do for You today. Give me the discipline to talk to You whenever I am in doubt or fear. Let me come to You if I get irritated. You are my solution.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Limitations loom large today. You can focus on the work in front of you while the Moon tours your 6th House of Daily Routine, but the urge to explore more of life could be distracting when the Moon squares Saturn in your 9th House of Expansion. Unfortunately, these desires will likely be accompanied by a long list of reasons why you can’t run off on an adventure, no matter how much you would like to. You can, however, successfully plan for future expeditions.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 9, 2024

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Daily Reflection

OPENING NEW DOORS

They [the Promises] are being fulfilled among us — sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84

The Promises talked about in this passage are slowly coming to life for me. What has given me hope is putting Step Nine into action. The Step has allowed me to see and set goals for myself in recovery.

Old habits and behaviors die hard. Working Step Nine enables me to close the door on the drunk I was, and to open new avenues for myself as a sober alcoholic. Making direct amends is crucial for me. As I repair relationships and behavior of the past, I am better able to live a sober life!

Although I have some years of sobriety, there are times when the “old stuff’ from the past needs to be taken care of, and Step Nine always works, when I work it.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Sometimes we hear an alcoholic say that the only thing he needs to do is to keep sober. Certainly he must keep sober, for there will be no home if he doesnt. But he is yet a long way from making good to the wife or parents whom for years he has so shockingly treated.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 82~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

When alcoholics are offered a life of sobriety by following the A.A. program, they will look at the prospect of living without alcohol and they will ask: “Am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some of the righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?” Have I found a more than sufficient substitute for drinking?

Meditation for the Day

In God’s strength you conquer life. Your conquering power is the grace of God. There can be no complete failure with God. Do you want to make the best of life? Then live as near as possible to God, the Master and Giver of all life. Your reward for depending on God’s strength will be sure. Sometimes the reward will be renewed power to face life, sometimes wrong thinking overcome, sometimes people brought to a new way of living. Whatever success comes will not be all your own doing, but largely the working out of the grace of God.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to rely more fully on the grace of God. I pray that I may live a victorious life.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Perspective

Too often, we try to gain a clear perspective before it is time.

That will make us crazy.

We do not always know why things are happening the way they are. We do not always know how a particular relationship will work out. We do not always understand the source of our feelings, why we’ve been led down a particular path, what is being worked out in us, what we are learning, why we needed to recycle, why we had to wait, why we needed to go through a time of discipline, or why a door closed. How our present circumstances will work into the larger scheme of events is not always clear to us. That is how it needs to be.

Perspective will come in retrospect.

We could strain for hours today for the meaning of something that may come in an instant next year.

Let it go. We can let go of our need to figure things out, to feel in control.

Now is the time to be. To feel. To go through it. To allow things to happen. To learn. To let whatever is being worked out in us take its course.

In hindsight, we will know. It will become clear. For today, being is enough. We have been told that all things shall work out for good in our life. We can trust that to happen, even if we cannot see the place today’s events will hold in the larger picture.

Today, I will let things happen without trying to figure everything out. If clarity is not available to me today, I will trust it to come later, in retrospect. I will put simple trust in the truth that all is well, events are unfolding as they should, and all will work out for good in my life – better than I can imagine.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Don’t let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.

—R. L. Evans

Feelings of discouragement are to be expected as part of life. We will have our times of greater energy and hope and our times of feeling depleted and lost. As we mature we learn to see many peaks and valleys across the landscape.

Giving ourselves over to feelings of discouragement is self-indulgent and saps our strength. We cannot see into the future. The dailiness of our lives isn’t always dramatic and doesn’t usually offer great changes. But we are part of an unfolding process. Looking back over just a week or a month, we can recall troubled times that now seem insignificant. We see other’ people and their progress, and we know they too grew just one day at a time and couldn’t see what the future would bring them. So we continue – knowing that our process is hopeful – even though we cannot foresee the details of our future.

I have the strength to live through the peaks and valleys and to stay faithful to my recovery.

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Elder’s Meditation

“…[W]isdom comes only when you stop looking for it and start truly living the life the Creator intended for you.”

–Lelia Fisher, HOH

There are many things that block us from wisdom such as; selfishness, secrets, hate, anger, jealousy and judgments. Another thing that can block us from wisdom is trying too hard or wishing something would happen. Wishing implies doubt and trying implies control. We need to let go of these things. We need to abandon ourselves to the Creator. As soon as we surrender everything, the wisdom starts to flow. The Elders know how to help us with this. Just ask them.

My Great Spirit, today I surrender my life and my will to Your care.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

 Get ready to pick up the pace! Loquacious Mercury is entering your talkative 3rd house, a sector it is very suited to inhabit. Here, Mercury can speed up your daily life by offering engaging pursuits and exciting conversation partners. It’ll be easier than ever to while away the day’s hours. This can be a really exciting, fun cycle, but do your best to maintain a sense of your goals as well, or else this phase may fly by without getting anything done.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 8, 2024

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Daily Reflection

LOVE WITHOUT STRINGS

Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89

Sponsorship held two surprises for me. First, that my sponsees cared about me. What I had thought was gratitude was more like love. They wanted me to be happy, to grow and remain sober. Knowing how they felt kept me from drinking more than once. Second, I discovered that I was able to love someone else responsibly, with respectful and genuine concern for that person’s growth. Before that time, I had thought that my ability to care sincerely about another’s well-being had atrophied from lack of use. To learn that I can love, without greed or anxiety, has been one of the deepest gifts the program has given me. Gratitude for that gift has kept me sober many times.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink.”~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition,

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 24~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

For the past two months we have been studying passages and steps from the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous. Now why not read the book itself again? It is essential that the A.A. program become part of us. We must have its essentials at our fingertips. We cannot study the Big Book too much or too often. The more we read it and study it, the better equipped we are to think A.A., act A.A., and live A.A. We cannot know too much about the program. The chances are that we will never know enough. But we can make as much of it our own as possible. How much of the Big Book have I thoroughly mastered?

Meditation for the Day

We need to accept the difficulties and disciplines of life so as to fully share the common life of other people. Many things that we must accept in life are not to be taken so much as being necessary for us personally, as to be experienced in order that we may share in the sufferings and problems of humanity. We need sympathy and understanding. We must share many of the experiences of life, in order to understand and sympathize with others. Unless we have been through the same experiences, we cannot understand other people or their makeup well enough to be able to help them.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may accept everything that comes my way as a part of life. I pray that I may make use of it in helping other people.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Prayer

Here are some of my favorite prayers:

Help. Please. Don’t.
Show me. Guide me. Change me.
Are you there?
Why’d you do that?
Oh.
Thank you.

Today, I will tell God what I want to tell God, and listen for God’s answer. I will remember that I can trust God.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Life itself is the proper binge.

—Julia Child

The Twelve Steps are a suggested program of recovery, not a cure. We can follow them and live a healed life, but we never develop immunity to our addictions and codependency. We remain vulnerable to slips, binges, and a return to old behaviors. If that has happened to us, our first need is to find a way back to the program. A slip may speak the blatant truth we avoided before. A man’s complete honesty following a slip has sometimes been the way to renewed knowledge of his powerlessness. There is no value in feeling more shame and self-hate in the aftermath of a slip. We need to accept we are incomplete and imperfect human beings. Recovery will come, not from shame, but from honestly accepting our powerlessness and the help we need.

The promise of recovery in this program, a healed life, is just as available after a slip as it ever was. It takes absolute commitment, a willingness to face the pain and hardship. Then we are freed again to engage fully in the joy and the awe of life.

I ask that my compulsions and my weaknesses be lifted from me. I’m not able to cure myself, but I pray for help.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Love is something that you can leave behind you when you die. It’s that powerful.”

–John (Fire) Lame Deer, ROSEBUD LAKOTA

The Old Ones say, love is all anyone needs. Love doesn’t go away nor can love be divided. Once you commit an act of love, you’ll find it continues. Love is like setting up dominos one behind the other. Once you hit the first domino, it will touch the second one which will touch the third one and so on. Every love act or love thought has an affect on each person as well as touching the whole world. If you live a life filled with love, the results will affect your friends, relatives, and other people, even after you go to the other side. So… Love.

My Creator, let me love. Let me put into action the love dominos.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your limitations are looming larger than normal. It makes perfect sense that you’d like to bounce around and see what everyone is up to while the Sun tours your 3rd House of Local Community, but that energy hits a blockade as it opposes Saturn in your 9th House of Expansion. You may feel like you’re missing an important part of the puzzle, or that you can’t focus on anything aside from the problems in your way. It’s okay; your path should soon clear.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 7, 2024

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Daily Reflection

“OUR SIDE OF THE STREET”

We are there to sweep off our side of the street, realizing that nothing worth while can be accomplished until we do so, never trying to tell him what he should do. His faults are not discussed. We stick to our own.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 77-78

I made amends to my dad soon after I quit drinking. My words fell on deaf ears since I had blamed him for my troubles. Several months later I made amends to my dad again. This time I wrote a letter in which I did not blame him nor mention his faults. It worked, and at last I understood! My side of the street is all that I’m responsible for and — thanks to God and A.A. — it’s clean for today.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“…the actual or potential alcoholic, with hardly an exception, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self knowledge. This is a point we wish to emphasize and re emphasize, to smash home upon our alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 39~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Another of the mottoes of A.A. is “Easy Does It.” This means that we just go along in A.A. doing the best we can and not getting steamed up over problems that arise in A.A. or outside of it. We alcoholics are emotional people and we have gone to excess in almost everything we have done. We have not been moderate in many things. We have not known how to relax. Faith in a Higher Power can help us to learn to take it easy. We are not running the world. I am only one among many. We are resolved to live normal, regular lives. From our A.A. experience we learn that “easy does it.” Have I learned to take it easy?

Meditation for the Day

“The eternal God is thy refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms.” Sheltering arms express the loving protection of God’s spirit. Human beings, in their troubles and difficulties need nothing so much as a refuge, a place to relax where they can lay down their burdens and get relief from cares. Say to yourself: “God is my refuge.” Say it until its truth sinks into your very soul. Say it until you know it and are sure of it. Nothing can seriously upset you or make you afraid, if God is truly your refuge.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may go each day to God as a refuge until fear goes and peace and security come. I pray that I may feel deeply secure in the Haven of His spirit.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Powerless over Others

Stop making excuses for other people.

Stop making excuses for ourselves.

While it is our goal to develop compassion and achieve forgiveness, acceptance, and love, it is also our goal to accept reality and hold people accountable for their behavior. We can also hold ourselves accountable for our own behavior and, at the same time, have compassion and understanding for ourselves.

When we claim powerlessness, we are not claiming irresponsibility. We have no power to control others, what they do, what they did, or what they might do. We’re stating that we are willing to end an ineffective life based on willpower and control. And we’re beginning a spiritual, mental, and emotional journey in which we take responsibility for ourselves.

We are not victims. We are not helpless. Accepting powerlessness when that is appropriate enables us to begin owning our true power to take care of ourselves.

Today, I will avoid making excuses for my own or someone else’s behavior. I will let consequences and responsibility fall where they belong.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Friendship and community are, first of all, inner qualities.

—Henri J. M. Nouwen

Many of us mistakenly search outside ourselves for answers. We feel small inside and not very powerful. Many of us men have tried to change our lives by affecting the people around us. Naturally, when we think of making friends, we assume we would start by getting a friend. But such beginnings often don’t lead very far.

Friendship begins as an inward attitude or feeling before it is expressed outwardly. Perhaps we could first notice whom we feel friendly toward. Whom do we admire? Whom do we feel an affinity with? Let that friendliness exist within, and it will begin to express itself. Are we grasping for acceptance or response? Let us remain with our own goodwill and not return to old attempts to get someone else to change. Friendship exists as a feeling of admiration, of love, of fellowship, without demand. And when we are another man’s friends, let us accept his friendship and enjoy it without trying to change it or him.

Today, I will simply notice my friendly feelings toward others.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Education is the new weapon of Indian people.”

–Eddie Box, SOUTHERN UTE

People have the ability to adapt. In these modern times we must get educated so the people don’t lose. We need lawyers, doctors, nurses, foresters, scientists, educators, carpenters, welders. These skills are needed to help the people. While we are learning, we need to remember to keep the culture, learn the dances, sing the songs, learn the language and maintain the Red Road for future generations.

Great Spirit, let my education never lack the meaning and value of spirituality.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Well-meaning pals can distract you from your most responsible urges. Mercury is in your 2nd House of Financial Responsibility, encouraging serious effort on the work in front of you, but Mercury will also trip over Uranus in your 11th House of Friendship. This sparks practically irresistible opportunities to enjoy yourself. Your phone may start blowing up with texts inviting you to come out and play! If possible, put any work on the back burner — you’ll have a hard time focusing on it either way.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 6, 2024

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Daily Reflection

REMOVING THREATS TO SOBRIETY

. . . except when to do so would injure them or others.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 59

Step Nine restores in me a feeling of belonging, not only to the human race but also to the everyday world. First, the Step makes me leave the safety of A.A., so that I may deal with non-A.A. people “out there,” on their terms, not mine. It is a frightening but necessary action if I am to get back into life. Second, Step Nine allows me to remove threats to my sobriety by healing past relationships. Step Nine points the way to a more serene sobriety by letting me clear away past wreckage, lest it bring me down.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

It works – it really does.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 88~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Another of the mottoes of A.A. is “Live and Let Live.” This, of course, means tolerance of people who think differently than we do, whether they are in A.A. or outside of A.A. We cannot afford the luxury of being intolerant or critical of other people. We do not try to impose our wills on those who differ from us. We are not “holier than thou.” We do not have all the answers. We are not better than other good people. We live the best way we can and we allow others to do likewise. Am I willing to live and let live?

Meditation for the Day

“And this is life eternal, that we may know Thee, the only true God.” Learning to know God as best you can draws the eternal life nearer to you. Freed from some of the limitations of humanity, you can grow in the things that are eternal. You can strive for what is real and of eternal value. The more you try to live in the consciousness of the unseen world, the gentler will be your passing into it when the time comes for you to go. This life on earth should be largely a preparation for the eternal life to come.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may live each day as though it were my last. I pray that I may live my life as though it were everlasting.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

The Good in Step Ten

Step Ten says: “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” It does not suggest that we ignore what is right in our life. It says we continue to take a personal inventory and keep a focus on ourselves.

When we take an inventory, we will want to look for many things. We can search out feelings that need our attention. We can look for low self-esteem creeping back in. We can look for old ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving. We can look for mistakes that need correcting.

But a critical part of our inventory can focus on what we’re doing right and on all that is good around us.

Part of our codependency is an obsessive focus on what’s wrong and what we might be doing wrong – real or imagined. In recovery we’re learning to focus on what’s right.

Look fearlessly, with a loving, positive eye. What did you do right today? Did you behave differently today than you would have a year ago? Did you reach out to someone and allow yourself to be vulnerable? You can compliment yourself for that.

Did you have a bad day but dealt effectively with it? Did you practice gratitude or acceptance? Did you take a risk, own your power, or set a boundary? Did you take responsibility for yourself in a way that you might not have before?

Did you take time for prayer or meditation? Did you trust God? Did you let someone do something for you?

Even on our worst days, we can find one thing we did right. We can find something to feel hopeful about. We can find something to look forward to. We can focus realistically on visions of what can be.

God, help me let go of my need to stay immersed in negativity. I can change the energy in my environment and myself from negative to positive. I will affirm the good until it sinks in and feels real. I will also strive to find one quality that I like about someone else who’s important to me, and I will take the risk of telling him or her that.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

I learned to listen to my body with an inner concentration like meditation, to get guidance as to when to exercise and when to rest. I learned that healing and cure are active processes in which I myself needed to participate.

—Rollo May

In our spiritual growth, one of our movements is from passive to active, from helpless to responsive. For example, we are passive if we don’t take responsibility for our bodies and don’t care for our wellness and conditioning. Do we passively leave our health in the doctor’s hands?

Do we take responsibility for our relationships? Are we active in nurturing them? We could add our own interests and positive energy to enrich them.

Our Higher Power speaks to us in a quiet, subtle voice, which can easily be ignored until we learn to listen. It takes courage to listen to this inner voice. When we listen, we develop a relationship that is a strong force moving us into recovery. We are still powerless over many things, but we can make active choices in how we will grow and how we will respond.

I will be guided in my choices by my inner voice.

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Elder’s Meditation

“We all form self-images and much of our behavior is pretty well determined by how we feel about ourselves.”

–Eunice Baumann-Nelson, Ph.D., PENOBSCOT

There is a cycle of building beliefs called the self talk cycle. Our self talk builds our self image and our self image determines our behavior, our actions, and our self worth – how we feel about ourselves. If we want to change the way we feel about ourselves we need to change our self talk. We need to build ourselves up. We need to talk to ourselves in a kind, positive, uplifting, good way. We need to talk to ourselves about the good things that are happening and know that we are worthy and expect abundance.

Oh Great Spirit, today help me to know myself. Help me to see the joy, kindness, strength and beauty that I am.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

This is no time to shirk your duties. It’s understandable if you’d prefer to stay in bed or curl up on the couch while the Moon rolls through your 4th House of Home, but that energy takes a turn for the overly public when the Moon opposes Chiron in your 10th House of Reputation. You may be called upon to play a role that feels like more work than you’d prefer to take on, but know that the results should be worth it.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 5, 2024

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Daily Reflection

EMOTIONAL BALANCE

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, . . .

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 83

When I survey my drinking days, I recall many people whom my life touched casually, but whose days I troubled through my anger and sarcasm. These people are untraceable, and direct amends to them are not possible. The only amends I can make to those untraceable individuals, the only “changes for the better” I can offer, are indirect amends made to other people, whose paths briefly cross mine. Courtesy and kindness, regularly practiced, help me to live in emotional balance, at peace with myself.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

Psychologists are inclined to agree with us. We have spent thousands of dollars for examinations. We know but few instances where we have given these doctors a fair break. We have seldom told them the whole truth nor have we followed their advice. Unwilling to be honest with these sympathetic men, we were honest with no one else. Small wonder many in the medical profession have a low opinion of alcoholics and their chance for recovery.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 73~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

One of the mottoes of A.A. is “First Things First.” This means that we should always keep in mind that alcohol is our number one problem. We must never let any other problem; whether of family, business, friends, or anything else take precedence in our minds over our alcoholic problem. As we go along in A.A., we learn to recognize the things that may upset us emotionally. When we find ourselves getting upset over something, we must realize that it’s a luxury we alcoholics can’t afford. Anything that makes us forget our number one problem is dangerous to us. Am I keeping sobriety in first place in my mind?

Meditation for the Day

Spiritual progress is the law of your being. Try to see around you more and more of beauty and truth, knowledge and power. Today try to be stronger, braver, more loving as a result of what you did yesterday. This law of spiritual progress gives meaning and purpose to your life. Always expect better things ahead. You can accomplish much good through the strength of God’s spirit in you. Never be too discouraged. The world is sure to get better, in spite of setbacks of war, hate, and greed. Be part of the cure of the world’s ills, rather than part of the disease.

Prayer of the Day

I pray that I may keep progressing in the better life. I pray that I may be a part of the forces for good in the world.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Step Ten

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
—Step Ten of Al Anon

Once we have worked our way to this Step, we can maintain and increase our self-esteem by regularly working Step Ten. This Step incorporates the process we have gone through in Steps Four through Nine. We do not work this Step to punish ourselves or to hold ourselves under a constantly critical and demeaning microscope. We do it to maintain self-esteem and harmony in our relationship with others and ourselves. We do it to stay on track.

When an issue or problem emerges and needs our attention, identify it and openly discuss it with at least one safe person and God. Accept it. Become willing to let go of it. Ask God to take it from us. Have a change of heart by the willingness to make whatever amend is called for – to do what is necessary to take care of ourselves. Take an appropriate action to resolve the matter. Then let go of the guilt and shame.

This is a simple formula for taking care of ourselves. This is how we change. This is how we become changed. This is the process for healing and health. This is the process for achieving self-responsibility and self esteem.

The next time we do something that bothers us, the next time we feel off track or off course, we don’t have to waste our time or energy feeling ashamed. We can take a Tenth Step. Let the process happen. And move on with our life.

God, help me make this Step and other Steps a habitual way of responding to life and my issues. Help me know that I am free to live, to allow myself to fully experiment with and experience life. If I get off course, or if an issue arises that demands my attention, help me deal with it by using the Tenth Step.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

He brought me out into an open place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.
—Psalms 18:19

We know in this program that our recovery was not an accident. We may be mystified by it or surprised to be feeling better. Some of us call it a miracle. We have worked hard in our recovery. We have suffered through some difficulties. Yet, our recovery is not an achievement or an accomplishment. It is a gift from our Higher Power. We were powerless to help ourselves. All we could do was ask for help.

As we live an improved life and enjoy the benefits of our growth, we may ask why we were given this gift. As we seek to know the will of God, the ancient passage quoted today offers an answer. “He rescued me because He delighted in me.” Can we let that in?

Thanks to God for all the rescued moments and for all the times I have been saved from my excesses.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Decisions that have been made for the last couple of centuries have been decisions made without the presence of a real God….from the vision, not of God, but of money.”

–Tom Porter, MOHAWK

As we view the world today, it’s easy to see the people are off track. We are no longer living in harmony. Focusing on the material only leads us from the path of the Creator. We must now pray for ourselves and the people in a pitiful way. We must be humble and ask the Great Spirit to intervene because if we don’t, our children will continue to have troubles. They are acting out our behavior as adults. Today is a good time to start. We need to get the spiritual way back into our lives. We need to focus on the spiritual.

My Creator, help me to focus on the spiritual way.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your home is the stage for a lovely day. The Moon and Venus are coordinating in your domestic 4th house, so this is the perfect time to bring some beauty and pleasure to your abode. This may look like you finally getting your ducks in a row to DIY a redecoration project — or maybe you’ll invite friends and family to an impulsive get-together at your place. Regardless, things will probably come together more easily than usual. Let any guests bring drinks or dessert!

Daily Recovery Readings
September 4, 2024

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Daily Reflection

RECONSTRUCTION

Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. . . .

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 83

The reconstruction of my life is the prime goal in my recovery as I avoid taking that first drink, one day at a time. The task is most successfully accomplished by working the Steps of our Fellowship. The spiritual life is not a theory; it works, but I have to live it. Step Two started me on my journey to develop a spiritual life; Step Nine allows me to move into the final phase of the initial Steps which taught me how to live a spiritual life. Without the guidance and strength of a Higher Power, it would be impossible to proceed through the various stages of reconstruction. I realize that God works for me and through me. Proof comes to me when I realize that God did for me what I could not do for myself, by removing that gnawing compulsion to drink. I must continue daily to seek God’s guidance. He grants me a daily reprieve and will provide the power I need for reconstruction.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 100~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“We must be careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. We are not fanatics or intolerant of people who can drink normally. Prospects are relieved when they find we are not witch burners. Temperate drinking is okay, but we alcoholics can’t get away with it. And no alcoholic likes to be told about alcohol by anyone who hates it. We shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility.” Do I have tolerance for those who can drink normally?

Meditation for the Day

Do not become encumbered by petty annoyances. Never respond to emotional upsets by emotional upset. Try to keep calm in all circumstances. Try not to fight back. Call on the grace of God to calm you when you feel like retaliating. Look to God for the inner strength to drop those resentments that drag you down. If you are burdened by annoyances, you will lose your inward peace and the spirit of God will be shut out. Try to keep peaceful within.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may do the things that make for peace. I pray that I may have a mission of conciliation.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Finding Direction

I used to spend so much time reacting and responding to everyone else that my life had no direction. Other people’s lives, problems, and wants set the course for my life. Once I realized it was okay for me to think about and identify what I wanted, remarkable things began to take place in my life.

—Anonymous

We each have a life to live, one that has purpose and meaning. We can help our Higher Power give direction and purpose to our life by setting goals.

We can set goals annually, monthly, or daily in times of crisis. Goals create direction and pace; goals help us achieve a manageable life that is directed in the course we choose for ourselves.

We can help give our lives direction by setting goals.

Today, I will pay attention to setting a course of action for my life, rather than letting others control my life and affairs.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

It is as important to cultivate your silence power, as it is your word power.

—William James

We bless ourselves with renewal and healing when we retreat from the world for a few private moments of silence. The power we cultivate in silence isn’t generated by us; that power comes to us. We can do this by deliberately withdrawing from all distractions. Then we quiet our inner selves by concentrating on deep relaxation, thinking about a brief reading, or by praying.

Most of us already have a personal island of renewal that we have turned to many times in the past for serenity and strength. We can use it and turn to it daily. This natural pattern is necessary for a strong and healthy life. It builds our relationship with our Higher Power and ourselves. In our problems with self-esteem, we often label as worthless the quiet, subtle things we do, but these very things are essential to build our strength and self esteem.

I will take time for silence to receive the power it gives in my life.

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Elder’s Meditation

“The Elders say that if you want something good, you have to suffer for it.”

–Chuck Ross, LAKOTA

People sometimes have a misconception of sacrifice. This is a strong word for Indian people. On the other side of sacrifice is another whole world. During sacrifice, our beliefs are tested. We may all have good beliefs but if you test a good belief, then you get real beliefs. Real beliefs make new people; real beliefs make new self images. Real beliefs allow determination and desires and faith to come true. Good is always available to us but we often can’t bring it within until we let go of the old ways. We let go of the old ways by suffering. Suffering is only letting go of things that don’t work anymore. On the other side of suffering is a new world.

Creator, help me to let go of old ways. Let my old thoughts and beliefs be abandoned. Every change is preceded by struggle. Help me go through the struggle today.

Elder’s Meditation

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Rev your engines and get ready to blast off from the starting line! You’re the special recipient of a mega dose of firepower as Mars arrives in your sign, giving you a special boost that you haven’t felt in roughly two years. You’ll have more energy at your disposal — and it’ll need to be used well. Otherwise, you could wind up overwhelmed by all this fire. Avoid letting it build up, because without proper release, you may just blow your top.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 3, 2024

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Daily Reflection

EMOTIONAL BALANCE

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, . . .

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 83

When I survey my drinking days, I recall many people whom my life touched casually, but whose days I troubled through my anger and sarcasm. These people are untraceable, and direct amends to them are not possible. The only amends I can make to those untraceable individuals, the only “changes for the better” I can offer, are indirect amends made to other people, whose paths briefly cross mine. Courtesy and kindness, regularly practiced, help me to live in emotional balance, at peace with myself.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

Psychologists are inclined to agree with us. We have spent thousands of dollars for examinations. We know but few instances where we have given these doctors a fair break. We have seldom told them the whole truth nor have we followed their advice. Unwilling to be honest with these sympathetic men, we were honest with no one else. Small wonder many in the medical profession have a low opinion of alcoholics and their chance for recovery.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 73~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

One of the mottoes of A.A. is “First Things First.” This means that we should always keep in mind that alcohol is our number one problem. We must never let any other problem; whether of family, business, friends, or anything else take precedence in our minds over our alcoholic problem. As we go along in A.A., we learn to recognize the things that may upset us emotionally. When we find ourselves getting upset over something, we must realize that it’s a luxury we alcoholics can’t afford. Anything that makes us forget our number one problem is dangerous to us. Am I keeping sobriety in first place in my mind?

Meditation for the Day

Spiritual progress is the law of your being. Try to see around you more and more of beauty and truth, knowledge and power. Today try to be stronger, braver, more loving as a result of what you did yesterday. This law of spiritual progress gives meaning and purpose to your life. Always expect better things ahead. You can accomplish much good through the strength of God’s spirit in you. Never be too discouraged. The world is sure to get better, in spite of setbacks of war, hate, and greed. Be part of the cure of the world’s ills, rather than part of the disease.

Prayer of the Day

I pray that I may keep progressing in the better life. I pray that I may be a part of the forces for good in the world.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Step Ten

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
—Step Ten of Al Anon

Once we have worked our way to this Step, we can maintain and increase our self-esteem by regularly working Step Ten. This Step incorporates the process we have gone through in Steps Four through Nine. We do not work this Step to punish ourselves or to hold ourselves under a constantly critical and demeaning microscope. We do it to maintain self-esteem and harmony in our relationship with others and ourselves. We do it to stay on track.

When an issue or problem emerges and needs our attention, identify it and openly discuss it with at least one safe person and God. Accept it. Become willing to let go of it. Ask God to take it from us. Have a change of heart by the willingness to make whatever amend is called for – to do what is necessary to take care of ourselves. Take an appropriate action to resolve the matter. Then let go of the guilt and shame.

This is a simple formula for taking care of ourselves. This is how we change. This is how we become changed. This is the process for healing and health. This is the process for achieving self-responsibility and self esteem.

The next time we do something that bothers us, the next time we feel off track or off course, we don’t have to waste our time or energy feeling ashamed. We can take a Tenth Step. Let the process happen. And move on with our life.

God, help me make this Step and other Steps a habitual way of responding to life and my issues. Help me know that I am free to live, to allow myself to fully experiment with and experience life. If I get off course, or if an issue arises that demands my attention, help me deal with it by using the Tenth Step.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

He brought me out into an open place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.
—Psalms 18:19

We know in this program that our recovery was not an accident. We may be mystified by it or surprised to be feeling better. Some of us call it a miracle. We have worked hard in our recovery. We have suffered through some difficulties. Yet, our recovery is not an achievement or an accomplishment. It is a gift from our Higher Power. We were powerless to help ourselves. All we could do was ask for help.

As we live an improved life and enjoy the benefits of our growth, we may ask why we were given this gift. As we seek to know the will of God, the ancient passage quoted today offers an answer. “He rescued me because He delighted in me.” Can we let that in?

Thanks to God for all the rescued moments and for all the times I have been saved from my excesses.

---

Elder’s Meditation

“Decisions that have been made for the last couple of centuries have been decisions made without the presence of a real God….from the vision, not of God, but of money.”

–Tom Porter, MOHAWK

As we view the world today, it’s easy to see the people are off track. We are no longer living in harmony. Focusing on the material only leads us from the path of the Creator. We must now pray for ourselves and the people in a pitiful way. We must be humble and ask the Great Spirit to intervene because if we don’t, our children will continue to have troubles. They are acting out our behavior as adults. Today is a good time to start. We need to get the spiritual way back into our lives. We need to focus on the spiritual.

My Creator, help me to focus on the spiritual way.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Every sentence may feel punctuated with a question mark. You’re prone to being a little out of sorts while Mars stumbles through your subconscious sector, but things will become even stranger when it picks a fight with illusory Neptune in your high-minded 9th house. You may feel like you’re tumbling down a rabbit hole toward wonderland, only to keep falling with no destination in sight. That’s okay — when it’s so difficult to get anywhere meaningful, you’re allowed to sit back and enjoy the ride.

Daily Recovery Readings
September 2, 2024

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Daily Reflection

FINDING “A REASON TO BELIEVE”

The willingness to grow is the essence of all spiritual development.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 171

A line from a song goes, “. . . and I look to find a reason to believe . . .” It reminds me that at one time I was not able to find a reason to believe that my life was all right. Even though my life had been saved by my coming to A.A., three months later I went out and drank again. Someone told me: “You don’t have to believe. Aren’t you willing to believe that there is a reason for your life, even though you may not know yourself what that reason is, or that you may not sometimes know the right way to behave?” When I saw how willing I was to believe there was a reason for my life, then I could start to work on the Steps. Now when I begin with, “I am willing. . . ,” I am using the key that leads to action, honesty, and an openness to a Higher Power moving through my life.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Unless ones family expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles we think we ought not to urge them. We should not talk incessantly to them about spiritual matters. They will change in time. Our behavior will convince them more than our words. We must remember that ten or twenty years of drunkenness would make a skeptic out of anyone”.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 83~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“Outline the program of action to new prospects, explaining how you made a self appraisal, how you straightened out your past, and why you are now endeavoring to help them. It is important for them to realize that your attempt to pass this on to them plays a vital part in your own recovery. The more hopeless they feel, the better. They will be more likely to follow your suggestions. Tell them about the fellowship of A.A. and if they show interest, lend them a copy of the Big Book.” Can I tell the A.A. story to another alcoholic?

Meditation for the Day

You should try to stand aside and let God work through you. You should try not to block Him off by your own efforts, or prevent His spirit working through you. God desires your obedient service and your loyalty to the ideals of the new life you are seeking. If you are loyal to God, He will give you protection against mistakes. His spirit will plan for you and secure for you a sufficiency of all spiritual help. You will have true victory and real success, if you will put yourself in the background and let God work through you.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not interfere with the working of God’s spirit in me and through me. I pray that I may give it full rein.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Detaching with Love with Children

It’s one thing to let go of my husband and let him suffer the consequences. But how do I let go of my children? Isn’t it different with children? Don’t we have responsibilities as parents?

—Al Anon member

We do have different responsibilities to our children than to other adults. We are financially responsible for our children; we are responsible for providing for their material and physical needs.

Our children need to be taught how to help themselves – from tying their shoes to making social plans. They need our love and guidance. They need consistent enforcement of boundaries, once we’ve established limits. They need a supportive, nurturing environment in which to grow. They need help learning values.

But we are not responsible for controlling our children. Contrary to popular belief, controlling doesn’t work. Discipline and nurturing do – if combined. Shame and guilt interfere with our children’s learning and our parenting. We need to respond to our children in a responsible way and hold them accountable for their actions at an age appropriate level. We need only do our best.

We can let our children have their own process of living; we can have our own process. And, we can take care of ourselves during that process. Seek balance. Seek wisdom, Seek not to have control, but to own our power as people who are parents.

Today, God, help me find an appropriate balance of responsibility to my children. Help me parent through nurturing and discipline, instead of control.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

A lot of what passes for depression these days is nothing more than a body saying that it needs work.

—Geoffrey Norman

Exercise changes our thought patterns in beneficial ways. Often we may feel irritable or blue and see nothing we can do about the situation. Then we are amazed at what simply going for a half hour walk will do. Although our situations don’t change, we are changed in how we respond to them. Exercise – whether going for a walk, working in the garden, playing ball, or scrubbing a floor – clears our minds. After some physical movement we find our thoughts getting clearer. Ideas come to mind that help us cope, and our spirit is energized.

Science has demonstrated that many serious cases of depression respond just as well to a program of vigorous daily exercise as to traditional treatment. In a sense, our Higher Power speaks to us through our muscles and bones when we move them. This spiritual experience, like many others, never comes from thinking about it, only from doing it.

Today, I will make time for physical activity.

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Elder’s Meditation

“I remember Dawson (No Horse) said, ‘Once you say your prayers, don’t worry about them. If you worry about them, they’ll just fade away.’”

–Chuck Ross, LAKOTA

Today I need to remember You are everywhere. I need to remember how much You love me. I need to know, Grandfathers, that You are always listening. Today I need to know how much You care. Today I will remember the advice of the Elders. “Say your prayers and then don’t worry – know that the Great One has heard you.” It’s so much easier to do this, Grandfather, when I feel connected to You.

My Creator, allow me this day to feel your presence. Let me walk the path of life today and talk to You many times. Give me faith, my Grandfather.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

There’s no point in keeping your ideas to yourself. There’s an emphasis on being open and honest as a New Moon electrifies your 3rd House of Communications, making it more important than ever that you interact with others and don’t hide yourself away. Even the smallest interaction can lead to something special, so be open to a little chit-chat with that person next to you in line or a neighbor you’ve never met. Get out and start saying bonjour to people!

Daily Recovery Readings
September 1, 2024

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Daily Reflection

WILLINGNESS TO GROW

If more gifts are to be received, our awakening has to go on.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 8

Sobriety fills the painful “hole in the soul” that my alcoholism created. Often I feel so physically well that I believe my work is done. However, joy is not just the absence of pain; it is the gift of continued spiritual awakening. Joy comes from ongoing and active study, as well as application of the principles of recovery in my everyday life, and from sharing that experience with others. My Higher Power presents many opportunities for deeper spiritual awakening. I need only to bring into my recovery the willingness to grow. Today I am ready to grow.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Step Eleven suggests prayer and meditation. We shouldn’t be shy
on this matter of prayer. Better men than we are using it constantly.“

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 8

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“Be careful not to brand new prospects as alcoholics. Let them draw their own conclusion. But talk to them about the hopelessness of alcoholism. Tell them exactly what happened to you and how you recovered. Stress the spiritual feature freely. If they are agnostics or atheists, make it emphatic that they do not have to agree with your conception of God. They can choose any conception they like, provided it makes sense to them. The main thing is that they be willing to believe in a Power greater than themselves and that they live by spiritual principles.” Do I hold back too much in speaking of the spiritual principles of the program?

Meditation for the Day

“I will never leave nor forsake thee.” Down through the centuries, thousands have believed in God’s constancy, untiringness, and unfailing love. God has love. Then forever you are sure of His love. God has power. Then forever you are sure, in every difficulty and temptation, of His strength. God has patience. Then always there is One who can never tire. God has understanding. Then always you will understand and be understood. Unless you want Him to go, God will never leave you. He is always ready with power.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may feel that God’s love will never fail. I pray that I may have confidence in His unfailing power.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

The Language of Letting Go

Patience

Sometimes we get what we want right away. At other times, we wonder if our desires will ever be fulfilled.

We will be fulfilled in the best way possible and as quickly as possible. But some things take time. Sometimes, we have lessons to learn first, lessons that prepare us so we can accept the good we deserve. Things are being worked out in us, and in others. Blocks in us are being removed. A solid foundation is being laid.

Be patient, Relax and trust. Let go. Then, let go some more. Good things are planned for us. We will receive them at the first available moment. We will have all our heart longs for. Relax and trust.

Today, I will identify what I want and need; then, I’ll be willing to let go of it. I will devote my energy to living my life today, so I may master my lessons as quickly as possible. I will trust that what I want and need is coming to me. I will let go of my need to control the details.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

If you wish to make an apple pie truly from scratch, you must first invent the universe.

—Carl Sagan

Everything is given to us. Our lives came forth with no plan on our part. We have no lease on life and no control, ultimately, over any possession. In the addictive and codependent families most of us came from, we learned something else. We learned a lonely arrogance that said, “I should be self sufficient. I have earned everything that ever came to me.” Deep down we probably knew how untrue that was, and we felt great self-doubt.

The cure we learn in this program for our lonely arrogance is a miracle and a blessing. We accept that we are part of a larger whole. Now it dawns on us – all of our friends and relatives share this basic powerlessness. We are all pilgrims. We are all guests. We are all stewards of creation. We can be close, and we must help one another because everyone is equally vulnerable.

I am grateful to my Higher Power today for the life, which has been given me. I pray for greater understanding of my responsibilities.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Everyone has a song. God gives us each a song. That’s how we know who we are. Our song tells us who we are.”

–Charlie Knight, UTE

As we start to walk the Red Road and as we develop ourselves as Warriors, a song will come to us. This song is given to each of us from the Great Spirit. Whenever we sing this song, we will receive courage and strength, not only for ourselves but if we sing this song for others, it will also help them. The song will give us power and make us feel really good. The song will make us see life in a sacred way. If you don’t have your song yet, ask the Creator in prayer if He will give you your song. With the song comes a responsibility – the responsibility to act and conduct oneself as a Warrior according to your song.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Take a second glance at your most significant relationships. They deserve some focused evaluation as Pluto returns to your partnership sector for one last visit this century. This can mean sounding out your current connections or simply working on how you approach various relationships — potential future ones included. You may experience one or two tough power plays in this arena, but this is a necessary lesson in exerting your power. You’re learning when to flex your muscles and when to fold.