Daily Recovery Readings
August 12, 2022

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Daily Reflection

A LOOK BACKWARD

First, we take a look backward and try to discover where we have been at fault; next we make a vigorous attempt to repair the damage we have done; . . .

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

As a traveler on a fresh and exciting A.A. journey of recovery, I experienced a newfound peace of mind and the horizon appeared clear and bright, rather than obscure and dim. Reviewing my life to discover where I had been at fault seemed to be such an arduous and dangerous task. It was painful to pause and look backward. I was afraid I might stumble! Couldn’t I put the past out of my mind and just live in my new golden present? I realized that those in the past whom I had harmed stood between me and my desire to continue my movement toward serenity. I had to ask for courage to face those persons from my life who still lived in my conscience, to recognize and deal with the guilt that their presence produced in me. I had to look at the damage I had done, and become willing to make amends. Only then could my journey of the spirit resume.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.

After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 103~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“There was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet by Alcoholics Anonymous. By doing so, we have a spiritual experience which revolutionizes our whole attitude toward life, toward others, and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives there in a way, which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do for ourselves.” Have I let God come into my life?

Meditation for the Day

The moment a thing seems wrong to you or a person’s actions to be not what you think they should be, at that moment begins your obligation and responsibility to pray for those wrongs to be righted or that person to be changed. What is wrong in your surroundings or in the people you know? Think about these things and make these matters your responsibility. Not to interfere or be a busybody, but to pray that a change may come through your influence. You may see lives altered and evils banished in time. You can become a force for good wherever you are.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be a co-worker with God. I pray that I may help people by my example.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Directness

Direct people are a joy to be around.

We never have to guess what they’re really thinking or feeling, because they’re honest about their thoughts and openly express their feelings.

We never have to wonder if they’re with us because they want to be, or if they’re there out of guilt and obligation.

When they do something for us, we don’t have to worry whether they’ll end up resenting us because direct people generally do things that please themselves.

We don’t have to fuss about the status of our relationship because if we ask, they’ll tell us.

We don’t have to worry if they’re angry because they deal openly with their anger and resolve it quickly.

We don’t have to ponder whether they are talking about us behind our backs because if they have something to say, it will be said to us directly.

We don’t have to wonder if we can rely on them because direct people are trustworthy.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we were all direct?

Today, I will let go of my notions that it is somehow good or desirable to be indirect. Instead, I will strive for honesty, directness, and clarity in my communication. I will let directness in my relationships begin with me.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

It is a terrible, an inexorable law that one cannot deny the humanity of another without diminishing one’s own: in the face of one’s victim, one sees oneself.

—James Baldwin

Acting totally in our self-interest is shortsighted and foolishly simple. Attacking another person or another nation reflects upon us like a mirror. When any person is undermined, the human race is diminished in some measure. And humanity is our family.

Sometimes we see a reflection of ourselves in someone else and fail to recognize it. What we hate most in another may well be what we hate in ourselves. Knowing this can be useful. Perhaps our teeth are set on edge when we think about an ex-wife, or father, or former friend, or a religious or racial group. How are we like that person or group? What do they cause us to face within ourselves? When we stop diminishing the other person we may still not like him or her, but we can come to terms with ourselves. We learn to live and let live.

God, help me engage in the brotherhood of my own family and with all people – and to see my own face, even in my enemy.

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Elder’s Meditation

“With one mind we address our acknowledgement, respect, and gratefulness to the sacred Cycle of Life. We, as humans, must remember to be humble and acknowledge the gifts we use so freely in our daily lives.”

–Audrey Shenandoah, ONONDAGA

The sacred Cycle of life – the baby, the youth, the adult, the Elder. Let us respect all directions, the four directions of the Grandfathers; let us respect their power. Let us remember we belong to the earth, the earth does not belong to us. Help us to be respectful to all the gifts You have given us.

Oh Great Spirit, help me this day to be humble. Let me not attack anything in deed or in my thoughts. Let my thoughts focus on the beauty You have created in all things.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Letting others get close to you may seem like a threat to your current freedom. On the other hand, perhaps you can have both connection and comfort by turning the conversation to one of your intellectual passions. With the emotional Moon in your expansive 9th house, you can bond rewardingly over ideas, even though you might not feel ready to disclose more personal things about your life. Plus, learning that you share core beliefs could later become a strong foundation for a deeper relationship.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 11, 2022

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Daily Reflection

REMOVING “THE GROUND GLASS”

The moral inventory is a cool examination of the damages that occurred to us during life and a sincere effort to look at them in a true perspective. This has the effect of taking the ground glass out of us, the emotional substance that still cuts and inhibits.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 140

My Eighth Step list used to drag me into a whirlpool of resentment. After four years of sobriety, I was blocked by denial connected with an ongoing abusive relationship. The argument between fear and pride eased as the words of the Step moved from my head to my heart. For the first time in years I opened my box of paints and poured out an honest rage, an explosion of reds and blacks and yellows. As I looked at the drawing, tears of joy and relief flowed down my cheeks. In my disease, I had given up my art, a self-inflicted punishment far greater than any imposed from outside. In my recovery, I learned that the pain of my defects is the very substance God uses to cleanse my character and to set me free.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“We are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to Captain’s table. Unlike the feelings of the ship’s passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways. The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us. But that in itself would never have held us together as we are now joined.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 17~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“While alcoholics keep strictly away from drink, they react to life much like other people. But the first drink sets the terrible cycle in motion. Alcoholics usually have no idea why they take the first drink. Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied, but in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. The truth is that at some point in their drinking they have passed into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of no avail.” Am I satisfied that I have passed my tolerance point for alcohol?

Meditation for the Day

He who made the ordered world out of chaos and set the stars in their courses and made each plant to know its season, He can bring peace and order out of your private chaos if you will let Him. God is watching over you, too, to bless you and care for you. Out of the darkness He is leading you to light, out of unrest to rest, out of disorder to order, out of faults and failure to success. You belong to God and your affairs are His affairs and can be ordered by Him if you are willing.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be led out of disorder into order. I pray that I may be led out of failure into success.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Healing

Let healing energy flow through your body.

The healing energy of God, the Universe, life, and recovery surrounds us. It is available, waiting for us to draw on it, waiting for us to draw it in. It’s waiting at our meetings or groups, on the words of a whispered prayer, in a gentle touch, a positive word, a positive thought. Healing energy is in the sun, the wind, and the rain, in all that is good.

Let healing energy come. Attract it. Accept it. Let it soak in. Breathe in the golden light. Exhale. Let go of fear, anger, hurt, and doubt. Let healing energy flow to you, through you.

It is yours for the asking, for the believing.

Today, I will ask for, and accept, the healing energy from God and the Universe. I will let it flow to me, through me, and back out to others. I am part of, and at one with, the continuous cycle of healing.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

I’d like to get away from earth awhile and then come back to it and begin again.

—Robert Frost

Do we think it’s weak to need a break? Do we ignore the need to recharge our batteries? Responsibility for our own lives requires us to recognize the need to restore our energy. Maybe our former escape from the world was by using food, or drugs, or spending money, or sexual release, or preoccupation with another person.

Now, since we are developing the ability to be with ourselves, we can take a break from the world and come back restored. This meditation time generates more energy for our lives. Recreation with friends, a walk, a movie, or a concert does the same. Taking responsibility to get away is a good cure for self-pity and exhaustion.

Today, I will be aware of my need to restore my energy.

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Elder’s Meditation

“May there be peace when we meet.”

–Audrey Shenandoah, ONONDAGA

The Elders tell us the greatest gift we can seek is peace of mind; to walk in balance, to respect all things. For us to do this, we must have peace within ourselves and peace within ourselves cannot come unless we are walking the path the Creator would have us walk. Sometimes the tests on this path are difficult, but we know that each test makes us stronger.

Oh Great Spirit, I ask You to whisper Your wisdom in my heart. You are the only one who knows the secret to peaceful living and the mystery of harmony. Teach me of Your peace, understanding and balance, and guide me onto your good path.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your financial picture might currently feel more abundant than usual. However, you may want to be careful how you talk about this within your social network. Your friends and acquaintances could be eager to pursue their own desires at the moment — it’s possible that they’re not above making themselves appear vulnerable and needy in order to get a piece of what you have. While being grateful for your blessings is important, this should probably be something you acknowledge privately for now.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 10, 2022

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Daily Reflection

REDOUBLING OUR EFFORTS

To a degree, he has already done this when taking moral inventory, but now the time has come when he ought to redouble his efforts to see how many people he has hurt, and in what ways,

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

As I continue to grow in sobriety, I become more aware of myself as a person of worth. In the process, I am better able to see others as persons, and with this comes the realization that these were people whom I had hurt in my drinking days. I didn’t just lie, I lied about Tom. I didn’t just cheat, I cheated Joe. What were seemingly impersonal acts, were really personal affronts, because it was people—people of worth—whom I had harmed. I need to do something about the people I have hurt so that I may enjoy a peaceful sobriety.

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Big Book Quote

“In our belief any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 101~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We who have found this solution to our alcoholic problem, who are properly armed with the facts about ourselves, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic. We who are making the approach to new prospects have had the same difficulty they have had. We obviously know what we are talking about. Our whole deportment shouts at new prospects that we are people with a real answer.” Am I a person with the real answer to the alcoholic problems of others?

Meditation for the Day

For straying from the right way there is no cure except to keep so close to the thought of God that nothing, no other interest, can seriously come between you and God. Sure of that, you can stay on God’s side. Knowing the way, nothing can prevent your staying in the way and nothing can cause you to seriously stray from it. God has promised peace if you stay close to Him, but not leisure. You still have to carry on in the world. He has promised heart-rest and comfort, but not pleasure in the ordinary sense. Peace and comfort bring real inward happiness.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may keep my feet on the way. I pray that I may stay on God’s side.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Letting Go of Perfection

As I journey through recovery, more and more I learn that accepting myself and my idiosyncrasies — laughing at myself for my ways — gets me a lot further than picking on myself and trying to make myself perfect. Maybe that’s really what it’s all about — absolute loving, joyous, nurturing self-acceptance.

—Anonymous

Stop expecting perfection from yourself and those around you.

We do a terrible, annoying thing to others and ourselves when we expect perfection. We set up a situation where others, including ourselves, do not feel comfortable with us. Sometimes, expecting perfection makes people so uptight that they and we make more mistakes than normal because we are so nervous and focused on mistakes.

That does not mean we allow inappropriate behaviors with the excuse “nobody’s perfect.” That doesn’t mean we don’t have boundaries and reasonable expectations of people and ourselves.

But our expectations need to be reasonable. Expecting perfection is not reasonable.

People make mistakes. The less anxious, intimidated, and repressed they are by expectations of being perfect, the better they will do.

Striving for excellence, purity in creativity, a harmonious performance, and the best we have to offer does not happen in the stymied, negative, fear-producing atmosphere of expecting perfection.

Have and set boundaries. Have reasonable expectations. Strive to do your best. Encourage others to do the same. But know that others and we will make mistakes. Know that others and we will have learning experiences, things we go through.

Sometimes, the flaws and imperfections in ourselves determine our uniqueness, the way they do in a piece of art. Relish them. Laugh at them. Embrace them, and ourselves.

Encourage others and ourselves to do the best we can. Love and nurture others and ourselves for being who we are. Then realize we are not merely human – we were intended and created to be human.

Today, God, help me let go of my need to be perfect and to unreasonably insist that others are perfect. I will not use this to tolerate abuse or mistreatment, but to achieve appropriate, balanced expectations. I am creating a healthy atmosphere of love, acceptance, and nurturing around and within me. I trust that this attitude will bring out the best in other people and in me.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

According to the teachers, there is only one thing that all people possess equally. This is their loneliness.

—Hyemeyohsts Storm

Many of us have tried to find a way to outwit our loneliness, or to escape its truth. We have learned that we cannot. As fathers looking at our children we may wish to spare them this pain. As men with our mates, we have dreamed of an ideal connection where all loneliness was dispelled.

We can’t obliterate loneliness. But we can learn to accept and deal with it. There is no need to compulsively cover all traces and all reminders that we are alone. We can accept this universal truth. We are alone, but so is everybody. We can make true contact with each other out of our aloneness. True intimacy with another man or woman comes out of first seeing our separateness, and then bridging the gap.

Today, I accept the feeling of loneliness as part of life. I can make contact with my brothers and sisters, knowing we are all in the same condition.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Nature is the storehouse of potential life of future generations and is sacred.”

–Audrey Shenandoah, ONONDAGA

We need to honor and respect our Mother Earth. She is the source of all life. The sun shines life to the earth, then the earth produces life in all forms and in a balanced way. Everything is here to serve everything else. If we interrupt the flow in any way, we leave nothing for the future generations. Before every decision is made, we should ask, and answer, a final question; “If we do this, what will be the effects on the seventh generation? What will we cause our children to live with?” We need to have respect and love for all things and for all people. We need to do this for ourselves and for all the children still unborn.

My Creator, let me look at nature today and let me have the highest respect for all the things I see. All the two legged, the four legged, the winged ones, the plants, the water, the air, the Mother Earth. Let me have respect for myself.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

An entrenched power dynamic could be a troublesome factor today. It will likely show up in one of your close relationships, whether it’s a friendship or another type of connection. You’re probably in a rut where each person plays their role without thinking about it. As the relational Moon moves into your 8th House of Intimacy, you have a chance to hit the reset button. Intentionally getting to know your companion as a well-rounded human can give you both room to acknowledge life’s gray areas.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 9, 2022

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Daily Reflection

“. . . OF ALL PERSONS WE HAD HARMED”

. . . and became willing to make amends to them all.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

One of the key words in the Eighth Step is the word all. I am not free to select a few names for the list and to disregard others. It is a list of all persons I have harmed. I can see immediately that this Step entails forgiveness because if I’m not willing to forgive someone, there is little chance I will place his name on the list. Before I placed the first name on my list, I said a little prayer: “I forgive anyone and everyone who has ever harmed me at any time and under any circumstances.”

It is well for me to contemplate a small, but very significant, two-letter word every time the Lord’s Prayer is said. The word is as. I ask, “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” In this case, as means, “in the same manner.” I am asking to be forgiven in the same manner that I forgive others. As I say this portion of the prayer, if I am harboring hatred or resentment, I am inviting more resentment, when I should be calling on the spirit of forgiveness.

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Big Book Quote

“We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn’t work.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 87~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

“We have an allergy to alcohol. The action of alcohol on chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy. We allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all. We cannot be reconciled to a life without alcohol, unless we can experience an entire psychic change. Once this psychic change has occurred, we who seemed doomed, we who had so many problems that we despaired of ever solving them, find ourselves able to control our desire for alcohol.” Have I had a psychic change?

Meditation for the Day

Ask God in daily prayer to give you the strength to change. When you ask God to change you, you must at the same time fully trust Him. If you do not fully trust Him, God may answer your prayer as a rescuer does that of a drowning person who is putting up too much of a struggle. The rescuer must first render the person still more helpless, until he or she is wholly at the rescuer’s mercy. Just so must we be wholly at God’s mercy before we can be rescued.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be daily willing to be changed. I pray that I may put myself wholly at the mercy of God.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Asking for What We Need

Decide what it is you want and need, and then go to the person you need it from and ask for it.

Sometimes, it takes hard work and much energy to get what we want and need. We have to go through the pains of identifying what we want, then struggle to believe that we deserve it. Then, we may have to experience the disappointment of asking someone, having the person refuse us, and figuring out what to do next.

Sometimes in life, getting what we want and need is not so difficult. Sometimes, all we need to do is ask.

We can go to another person, or our Higher Power, and ask for what we need.

But because of how difficult it can be, at times, to get what we want and need, we may get trapped in the mind set of believing it will always be that difficult. Sometimes, not wanting to go through the hassle, dreading the struggle, or out of fear, we may make getting what we want and need much more difficult than it needs to be.

We may get angry before we ask, deciding that we’ll never get what we want, or anticipating the “fight” we’ll have to endure. By the time we talk to someone about what we want, we may be so angry that we’re demanding, not asking; thus our anger triggers a power play that didn’t exist except in our mind.

Or we may get so worked up that we don’t ask–or we waste far more energy than necessary fighting with ourselves, only to find out that the other person, or our Higher Power, is happy to give us what we want.

Sometimes, we have to fight and work and wait for what we want and need. Sometimes, we can get it just by asking or stating that this is what we want. Ask. If the answer is no, or not what we want, then we can decide what to do next.

Today, I will not set up a difficult situation that doesn’t exist with other people, or my Higher Power, about getting what I want and need. If there is something I need from someone, I will ask first, before I struggle.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We must embrace the absurd and go beyond everything we have ever known.

—Janie Gustafson

We have stepped beyond the limits of our former life and accepted the possibility of the unknown. Many of us have always tried to be rational, to trust only what we could understand or reason through. That attempt served the part of us that lusted for control and power, but it kept us from unknown possibilities and dreams.

When we decide to be less controlling, we begin to believe in possibilities we didn’t allow before. That is how we let God influence our lives. Perhaps we don’t see a reasonable way to a more satisfying job, but we can be open to surprising possibilities. We may see nothing we can do to overcome our compulsions, but we pray for God to remove our shortcomings in God’s way, and already we have a new attitude.

God, give me the courage to step into the unknown, the absurd, and experience the awakening of my spirit.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Praying to seek a vision, to seek truth is always right. Truth builds upon itself – as the true mark of a warrior who conducts himself/herself accordingly – so that its beauty may shine in the faces of our children.”

–Barney Bush, SHAWNEE

We move toward and become like that which we think about. What we think about creates our vision. If our thoughts are wise and good, then our vision becomes strong and truthful. If our thoughts are junk, then our vision becomes contaminated. It’s important to be aware of what we are thinking about. As I live my vision, my children watch and live their lives the same way. We need to live the walk of the Warrior. We need to walk in beauty and respect.

Oh Great Spirit, give me a vision for today. Let me see truth. Let me walk in beauty. Let my heart guide me in truth. The law says the truth shall set you free. Let me be free today.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You could be concerned about looking good at this point — not just physically, but morally, too. While you have a right to defend your side of the story, you might easily cross the line into painting another person as the villain when the truth is really a little more complicated. A jury of your peers is likely to call you out on your exaggerations given the opportunity. Make an effort to rein yourself in before that becomes necessary.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 8, 2022

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Daily Reflection

“MADE A LIST . . .”

“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, . . .“

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

When I approached the Eighth Step, I wondered how I could list all the things that I have done to other people since there were so many people, and some of them weren’t alive anymore. Some of the hurts I inflicted weren’t bad, but they really bothered me. The main thing to see in this Step was to become willing to do whatever I had to do to make these amends to the best of my ability at that particular time. Where there is a will, there’s a way, so if I want to feel better, I need to unload the guilt feelings I have. A peaceful mind has no room for feelings of guilt. With the help of my Higher Power, if I am honest with myself, I can cleanse my mind of these feelings.

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Big Book Quote

“We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick. Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, ‘This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done.'”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 66~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

For awhile, we are going back to the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous, and pick out passages here and there, so that they may become fixed in our minds, a little at a time, day by day, as we go along. There is no substitute for reading the Big Book. It is our “bible.” We should study it thoroughly and make it a part of ourselves. We should not try to change any of it. Within its covers is the full exposition of the A.A. program. There is no substitute for it. We should study it often. Have I studied the Big Book faithfully?

Meditation for the Day

All of life is a fluctuation between effort and rest. You need both every day. But effort is not truly effective until first you have had the proper preparation for it, by resting in a time of quiet meditation. This daily time of rest and meditation gives you the power necessary to make your best effort. There are days when you are called on for much effort and then comes a time when you need much rest. It is not good to rest too long and it is not good to carry on great effort too long without rest. The successful life is a proper balance between the two.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be ready to make the proper effort. I pray that I may also recognize the need for relaxation.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Saying Yes

Yesterday we talked about learning to say no. Today, let’s discuss another important word: Yes.

We can learn to say yes to things that feel good, to what we want – for others and ourselves.

We can learn to say yes to fun. Yes to meetings, to calling a friend, asking for help.

We can learn to say yes to healthy relationships, to people and activities that are good for us.

We can learn to say yes to ourselves, what we want and need, our instincts, and the leading of our Higher Power.

We can learn to say yes when it feels right to help someone. We can learn to say yes to our feelings. We can learn to identify when we need to take a walk, take a nap, have our back rubbed, or buy ourselves flowers.

We can learn to say yes to work that is right for us.

We can learn to say yes to all that will nurture and nourish us. We can learn to say yes to the best life and love has to offer.

Today, I will say yes to all that feels good and right.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

I got the blues thinking of the future, so I left off and made some marmalade. It’s amazing how it cheers one up to ‘shred oranges and scrub the floor.

—D. H. Lawrence

Focusing on pain or having difficulties can put us in a rut, and we neglect the other things in our lives. A simple task like making marmalade can be a brief vacation. We change our thought patterns when we change activities. The simple action of doing something pleasant might inject a new feeling into our outlook. Sharing a problem with a friend may be all we need to see it more clearly or let it go. Moving from busy physical activity to a few moments of quiet contemplation creates an inner balance. A problem that seems overwhelming at night may be met with new insight and new energy after a night’s rest.

We don’t have to continue feeling like victims of circumstance or remain stuck with a nagging problem. Just like changing the subject of a conversation, we can change the subject of our attention for a time. When we do, we regain our sense of hope and change our responses.

Today, I will give myself a break when I become caught or obsessed with a problem.

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Elder’s Meditation

“The Creator told everyone of us in our tribal beginnings to look after our ceremonies, and each other.”

–Barney Bush, SHAWNEE

Our ceremonies are important and each has a purpose. They teach us about the Creator and about each other. The ceremonies teach us to be humble and teach us to pray. They teach us to look inside ourselves. We should remember to pray each morning. Ask the Creator to guide our thinking. Think only good thoughts. Think good thoughts about our relatives and about our brothers and sisters. Pray for our children in ceremony. Give thanks to the Great Mystery of life. All life is sacred. Pray in a sacred way.

Oh Great Spirit, I come to You this morning in ceremony. I come to this sacred place to talk to You. I thank You for Your guidance and protection. Give me Your eyes today so I may see the beauty in all things.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Professional ambition may stress you out at the moment, as you might tend to push yourself in a way that’s not good for you. Try to look closely at the material rewards you’re already receiving for your efforts. Perhaps you already have enough to meet your needs, even if you didn’t think this was the case. Your preconceived notions about success could be blocking you from seeing your situation rationally, so consider talking to someone who can give you an outside perspective.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 7, 2022

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Daily Reflection

A “DESIGN FOR LIVING”

We in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, “a design for living” that really works.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 28

I try each day to raise my heart and hands in thanks to God for showing me a “design for living” that really works through our beautiful Fellowship. But what, exactly, is this “design for living” that “really works”? For me, it is the practice of the Twelve Steps to the best of my ability, the continued awareness of a God who loves me unconditionally, and the hope that, in each new day, there is a purpose for my being. I am truly, truly blessed in the Fellowship.

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Big Book Quote

“But my friend sat before me, and he made the pointblank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known!”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 11~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We in A.A. are offering an intangible thing, a psychological and spiritual program. It’s a wonderful program. When we learn to turn to a Higher Power, with faith that that Power can give us the strength we need, we find peace of mind. When we re-educate our minds by learning to think differently, we find new interests that make life worthwhile. We who have achieved sobriety through faith in God and mental re-education are modern miracles. It is the function of our A.A. program to produce modern miracles. Do I consider the change in my life a modern miracle?

Meditation for the Day

You should never doubt that God’s spirit is always with you, wherever you are, to keep you on the right path. God’s keeping power is never at fault, only your realization of it. You must try to believe in God’s nearness and availability of His grace. It is not a question of whether God can provide a shelter from the storm, but of whether or not you seek the security of that shelter. Every fear, worry, or doubt is disloyalty to God. You must endeavor to trust God wholly. Practice saying: “All is going to be well.” Say it to yourself until you feel it deeply.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may feel deeply that all is well. I pray that nothing will be able to move me from that deep conviction.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Saying No

For many of us, the most difficult word to say is one of the shortest and easiest in the vocabulary: No. Go ahead, say it aloud: No.

No – simple to pronounce, hard to say. We’re afraid people won’t like us, or we feel guilty. We may believe that a “good” employee, child, parent, spouse, or Christian never says no.

The problem is, if we don’t learn to say no, we stop liking ourselves and the people we always try to please. We may even punish others out of resentment.

When do we say no? When no is what we really mean.

When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean.

If we’re scared to say no, we can buy some time. We can take a break, rehearse the word, and go back and say no. We don’t have to offer long explanations for our decisions.

When we can say no, we can say yes to the good. Our no’s and our yes’s begin to be taken seriously. We gain control of ourselves. And we learn a secret: “No” isn’t really that hard to say.

Today, I will say no if that is what I mean.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We love because it’s the only true adventure.
—Nikki Giovanni

In loving, we meet ourselves. As we have become more honest, we no longer make excuses about our relationship problems. We can’t blame our troubles on our partner. Our problems with love were often because we didn’t know how to be close or we didn’t dare to be.

When we let ourselves engage in this adventure, we meet many obstacles – things we can’t control, and sometimes we want to quit right there. We have arguments and disappointments as well as good feelings. But what adventure is without difficulty or surprises? Part of the reason for choosing new experiences is to confront forces outside our control. A relationship is a dialogue. Only if we stay with it through the frustrations, express our deepest feelings openly, and listen to our partner, do we achieve a new level of understanding and confidence in the relationship. Then deeper levels also open within ourselves.

Today, I will let honesty guide me in this adventure of my love dialogue.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Everything I know I learned by listening and watching.”

–Vernon Cooper, LUMBEE

Sometimes my mind is talking so fast about so many different things that I can’t slow it down. All day long I am judging and making assumptions about everything.

Great Spirit, help me this day to slow down. Help me to listen – quietly. Help me to watch carefully. Help me to listen to my inner voice. Let me listen and watch only the thing You would have me observe. Guide my eyes and my ears to be focused on You. Grandfather, love me today and teach me to be quiet.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Finding comfortable boundaries in conversation with your friends at this moment could be difficult. Though you may desire to charge ahead at any cost, pushing too hard on a difficult or sensitive topic is likely to cause more trouble than it’s worth. On the other hand, if you’re craving depth beyond boring small talk, you can communicate a fair amount about your larger views on life without going into too many potentially conflict-provoking details. A vague approach is probably the best approach.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 6, 2022

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Daily Reflection

DRIVEN

Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 62

My selfishness was the driving force behind my drinking. I drank to celebrate success and I drank to drown my sorrows. Humility is the answer. I learn to turn my will and my life over to the care of God. My sponsor tells me that service keeps me sober. Today I ask myself: Have I sought knowledge of God’s will for me? Have I done service for my A.A. group?

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“But my friend sat before me, and he made the pointblank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known!”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 11~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Psychologists are turning to religion because just knowing about ourselves is not enough. We need the added dynamic of faith in a power outside of ourselves on which we can rely. Books on psychology and psychiatric treatments are not enough without the strength that comes from faith in God. And clergy and rabbis are turning to psychology because faith is an act of the mind and will. Religion must be presented in psychological terms to some extent in order to satisfy the modern person. Faith must be built largely on our own psychological experience. Have I taken what I need from both psychology and religion when I live the A.A. way?

Meditation for the Day

Refilling with the spirit is something you need every day. For this refilling with the spirit, you need these times of quiet communion, away, alone, without noise, without activity. You need this dwelling apart, this shutting yourself away in the very secret place of your being, away alone with your Maker. From these times of communion you come forth with new power. This refilling is the best preparation for effective work. When you are spiritually filled, there is no work too hard for you.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be daily refilled with the right spirit. I pray that I may be full of the joy of true living.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Solving Problems

Problems are made to be solved!

Some of us spend more time reacting to the fact that we have a problem than we do solving the problem. “Why is this happening to me?” . . . “Isn’t life awful?” . . . “How come this had to happen?” . . . “Oh, dear. This is terrible.” . . . “Why is God (the Universe, an agency, a person, or life) picking on me?”

Problems are inevitable. Some problems can be anticipated. Some are surprises. But the idea that problems occur regularly need never be a surprise.

The good news is that for every problem, there’s a solution. Sometimes the solution is immediate. Sometimes, it takes awhile to discover. Sometimes, the solution involves letting go. Sometimes, the problem is ours to solve; sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes, there is something we can clearly do to solve the problem; other times, we need to struggle, flounder, do our part, and then trust our Higher Power for help.

Sometimes, the problem is just part of life. Sometimes, the problem is important because we are learning something through the problem and its solution. Sometimes, problems end up working out for good in our life. They get us headed in a direction that is superior to one we may otherwise have taken.

Sometimes, problems just are; sometimes they are a warning sign that we are on the wrong track.

We can learn to accept problems as an inevitable part of life. We can learn to solve problems. We can learn to trust our ability to solve problems. We can learn to identify which problems are trying to lead us in a new direction, and which simply ask for solving.

We can learn to focus on the solution rather than on the problem, and maintain a positive attitude toward life and the inevitable flow of problems and solutions.

Today, I will learn to trust solutions, rather than be victimized by problems. I will not use problems to prove I am helpless, picked on, or martyred. I will not point to my problems to prove how awful life is. I will learn to trust the flow of problems and solutions. God, help me solve the problems I can solve today. Help me let go of the rest. Help me believe in my ability to tackle and solve problems. Help me trust the flow. For each problem, there is a solution.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

God respects me when I work, but he loves me when I sing.

—Rabindranath Tagore

We seek balance in our lives. The greatest sign of unmanageability in our past was the unbalanced lives we led. This is no easy lesson to learn. We are inclined to grasp for a single answer, thinking we now have the key insight to a happier way of life. As men, many of us have pursued our happiness in work with little time for anything else. Perhaps, for some, the singing and playing we have done were part of our addiction or participating with someone else in their addiction. This makes it feel dangerous or frightening now to be playful in recovery.

We can find ways to have more balance in our lives. Spiritual vitality grows when we make room in our day for lighthearted play as well as the serious tasks.

I pray for guidance from my Higher Power to help me find a balance in my life today.

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Elder’s Meditation

“We have to have one mind for the Four Directions. Until we reach that one mind, we cannot be filled with understanding…. The Creator will not answer until you have just one mind, just like if you have one person.”

–Grandfather William Commanda, ALGONQUIN

The Elders have taught us to balance our lives emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. If I am out of control emotionally, I get angry, doubtful or erratic, I am out of balance. If I trigger bad mental pictures of my brothers and sisters, I am out of balance. If I get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, I am out of balance physically. If I don’t pray and talk to the Creator daily, I am out of balance spiritually. To be centered, I must be in balance. The Creator talks to me in the quiet and still place. So if I get angry, what I should do first is to pause and get still so I can hear the guidance of the Grandfathers.

Oh Great Spirit whose voice I hear in the winds, protect and keep me safe today – hear my prayers.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Letting yourself drift into autopilot as you go about your chores could be appealing to you now. Listening to music or a favorite podcast while you sink into your to-do list is likely to raise your spirits, but the worst enemy of a pleasant experience would probably be having to answer endless questions about what you’re doing. Try to work alone — or with a collaborator who understands your project well enough that you don’t have to explain everything to them.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 5, 2022

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Daily Reflection

LISTENING DEEPLY

How persistently we claim the right to decide all by ourselves just what we shall think and just how we shall act.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 37

If I accept and act upon the advice of those who have made the program work for themselves, I have a chance to outgrow the limits of the past. Some problems will shrink to nothingness, while others may require patient, well-thought-out action. Listening deeply when others share can develop intuition in handling problems which arise unexpectedly. It is usually best for me to avoid impetuous action. Attending a meeting or calling a fellow A.A. member will usually reduce tension enough to bring relief to a desperate sufferer like me. Sharing problems at meetings with other alcoholics to whom I relate, or privately with my sponsor, can change aspects of the positions in which I find myself. Character defects are identified and I begin to see how they work against me. When I put my faith in the spiritual power of the program, when I trust others to teach me what I need to do to have a better life, I find that I can trust myself to do what is necessary.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“If God can solve the age-old riddle of alcoholism, He can solve your problems too.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, To Wives, Page 116~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We in A.A. are offering a spiritual program. The fundamental basis of A.A. is belief in some Power greater than ourselves. This belief takes us off the center of the universe and allows us to transfer our problems to some power outside of ourselves. We turn to this Power for the strength we need to get sober and stay sober. We put our drink problem in God’s hands and leave it there. We stop trying to run our own life and seek to let God run it for us. Do I do my best to give spiritual help?

Meditation for the Day

God is your healer and your strength. You do not have to ask Him to come to you. He is always with you in spirit. At your moment of need He is there to help you. Could you know God’s love and His desire to help you, you would know that He needs no pleading for help. Your need is God’s opportunity. You must learn to rely on God’s strength whenever you need it. Whenever you feel inadequate to any situation, you should realize that the feeling of inadequacy is disloyalty to God. Just say to yourself: I know that God is with me and will help me to think and say and do the right thing.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may never feel inadequate to any situation. I pray that I may be buoyed up by the feeling that God is with me.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Attitudes Toward Money

Sometimes, our life and history may be so full of pain that we think it totally unfair that we have to grow up now and be financially responsible for ourselves.

The feeling is understandable; the attitude is not healthy. Many people in recovery may believe that certain people in particular, and life in general, owes them a living after what they’ve been through.

To feel good about ourselves, to find the emotional peace and freedom we’re seeking in recovery, we need healthy boundaries about money – what we give to others, and what we allow ourselves to receive from others.

Do we feel that others owe us money because we cannot take care of ourselves? Do we believe others owe us because we do not have as much money as they do? Do we consciously or subconsciously believe that they “owe” us money because of emotional pain we suffered as a result of our relationship with them or another person?

Punitive damages are awarded in court, but not in recovery.

Unhealthy boundaries about what we allow ourselves to receive from others will not lead to healthy relationships with others or ourselves.

Test by looking within. The key is our attitude. The issue is boundaries about receiving money. Become willing to meet the challenge of taking responsibility for yourself.

Today, I will strive for clear, healthy boundaries about receiving money from others. As part of my recovery, I will take a hard look at my financial history and examine whether I have taken money that may not reflect good boundaries. If I uncover some incidents that reflect less than an attitude of healthy self-responsibility, I will become willing to make amends and develop a reasonable plan to do that.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The whole problem is to establish communication with one’s self.

—E. B. White

We are like many-faceted gemstones. Each side represents a different aspect of us. We have our emotional sides with different feelings and responses. We have our competencies and strengths, hopes and desires, destructiveness and negativity, self-doubts and resentments. We also possess a drive for power and knowledge, a desire to serve, and a wish to connect with others.

Our spiritual masculinity requires that we know our many sides. We need a working relationship with our thoughts and feelings so they can be appreciated, accepted, and understood. When we tell our story in a meeting, we let others know us, and we get to know ourselves better. When we are spontaneous in what we say or do, we communicate with ourselves. We discover ourselves through meditation, journal writing, playfulness, physical activity, and conversations with others. In that way we become more honest.

Today, I will use my lines of communication with myself and become more self-accepting and more honest.

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Elder’s Meditation

“It is a paradox in the contemporary world that in our desire for peace we must willingly give ourselves to struggle.”

–Linda Hogan, CHICKASAW

The Grandfathers have taught us about sacrifice. We have been taught to pray for the people in a pitiful way. Struggle and conflict is neither good nor bad, it just is. Everything that grows experiences conflict. When the deer is born it is through conflict. When the seed first grows, it is through conflict. Conflict precedes clarity. Everything has the seasons of growth. Recognize – acknowledge – forgive and change. All of these things are done through conflict.

Great Spirit, give me the courage today to see that struggle and conflict are here to teach me lessons that are a gift from you.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Psyching yourself up to take a chance that you’re considering might be difficult at the moment. Soliciting encouragement from your friends could seem appealing, but be careful about asking questions that you don’t quite want to hear the answers to. Once you get others involved in your situation, it can be hard to dial their involvement back, because they may feel like they have a stake in the outcome. Only open the door on your privacy if you’re ready to potentially lose it.

Daily Recovery Readings
August 4, 2022

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Daily Reflection

SEEDS OF FAITH

Faith, to be sure, is necessary, but faith alone can avail nothing. We can have faith, yet keep God out of our lives.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 34

As a child I constantly questioned the existence of God. To a “scientific thinker” like me, no answer could withstand a thorough dissection, until a very patient woman finally said to me, “You must have faith.” With that simple statement, the seeds of my recovery were sown!

Today, as I practice my recovery – cutting back the weeds of alcoholism – slowly I am letting those early seeds of faith grow and bloom. Each day of recovery, of ardent gardening, brings the Higher Power of my understanding more fully into my life. My God has always been with me through faith, but it is my responsibility to have the willingness to accept His presence.

I ask God to grant me the willingness to do His will.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

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Big Book Quote

“Doubtless you are curious to discover how and why, in the face of expert opinion to the contrary, we have recovered from a hopeless condition of mind and body. If you are an alcoholic who wants to get over it, you may already be asking What do I have to do?”

It is the purpose of this book to answer such questions specifically. We shall tell you what we have done.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, Page 20~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We in A.A. are offering a kind of psychological program as well as a spiritual one. First, people must be mentally able to receive it. They must have made up their minds that they want to quit drinking, and they must be willing to do something about it. Their confidence must be obtained. We must show them that we are their friends and really desire to help them. When we have their confidence, they will listen to us. Then the A.A. fellowship is a kind of group therapy. Newcomers need the fellowship of other alcoholics who understand their problem because they have had it themselves. Individuals must learn to re-educate their minds. They must learn to think differently. Do I do my best to give mental help?

Meditation for the Day

“And this is life eternal, that they may know Thee.” It is the flow of life eternal through spirit, mind, and body that cleanses, heals, restores, and renews. Seek conscious contact with God more and more each day. Make God an abiding presence during the day. Be conscious of His spirit helping you. All that is done without God’s spirit is passing. All that is done with God’s spirit is life eternal.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be in the stream of eternal life. I pray that I may be cleansed and healed by the Eternal Spirit.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Vulnerability

I‘ve learned that the more vulnerable I allow myself to be, the more in control of myself I really am.

—Anonymous

Many of us feel that we can only show our strong, confident side. We believe the face we have to show to the world should always be one of politeness, perfection, calm, strength, and control.

While it is certainly good and often appropriate to be in control, calm, and strong, there is another side to all of us – that part of us that feels needy, becomes frightened, has doubts, and gets angry. That part of us that needs care, love, and reassurance those things will be okay. Expressing these needs makes us vulnerable and less than perfect, but this side needs our acceptance too.

Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable will help us build lasting relationships. Sharing our vulnerabilities helps us feel close to people and helps others feel close to us. It helps us grow in self-love and self-acceptance. It helps us become healing agents. It allows us to become whole and accessible to others.

Today, I will allow myself to be vulnerable with others when it’s safe and appropriate to do so.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The craftsman does not always build toward a prior vision. Often images come in the process of working. The material, his hands – together they beget.

—M. C. Richards

We awaken in the morning, and the day is an un-built creation. We have some ideas about what we will accomplish today. But our Higher Power also has some things in mind, which are not yet part of our consciousness. We have lived long enough to know that every day brings surprises. We know in advance we will be frustrated in some of our desires, and we may be helped or advanced in others. But what about the totally unexpected? Will we even notice the subtle opportunities? Will we see an opportunity for a friendly conversation? Do our plans unwittingly prevent other possibilities from intruding?

When we hold loosely to our daily plans, we are more open to knowing the will of our Higher Power. Then each day is a spiritual process. It becomes a combined creation of our Higher Power and our own consciousness.

Today, I will hold my own plan loosely so that I can continue to be open to the healing powers of God.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Telling about our lives is important for those who come after as, for those who will see our experience as part of their own historical struggle.”

–Linda Hogan, CHICKASAW

How important it is for us to support one another? How important it is for us to know our culture and to share our experiences with one another? How powerful it is to be authentic? How important it is to hold no secrets? I am as sick as my secrets.

Grandfather, allow me today to be willing to share with my brother and sister. Let my eyes see You in their eyes. Let me not judge them but only love them. Grandfather, help me, for I am Your humble servant.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Saying anything is probably better than saying nothing at present, but speaking from the heart could be a special treat. With messenger Mercury shifting into your 3rd House of Communication, you’re well-equipped to catch up on any backlog of correspondence you’ve been meaning to get to. While this applies to both personal and professional content, a human touch is likely valuable either way. Telling someone something they didn’t expect to hear is likely to succeed with a thoughtfully sensitive approach, so loop them in!

Daily Recovery Readings
August 3, 2022

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Daily Reflection

. . .TO BE OF SERVICE

Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 77

It is clear that God’s plan for me is expressed through love. God loved me enough to take me from alleys and jails so that I could be made a useful participant in His world. My response is to love all of His children through service and by example. I ask God to help me imitate His love for me through my love for others.

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Big Book Quote

Though it was not our intention to create such an impression, many alcoholics have nevertheless concluded that in order to recover they must acquire an immediate and overwhelming “God-consciousness” followed at once by a vast change in feeling and outlook.

– Pg. 567 – 4th. Edition – Appendices II – Spiritual Experience

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

A.A. Thought For The Day

We in A.A. must remember that we are offering something intangible. We are offering a psychological and spiritual program. We are not offering a medical program. If people need medical treatment, we call in a doctor. If they need a medical prescription, we let the doctor prescribe for them. If they need hospital treatment, we let the hospital take care of them. Our vital A.A. work begins when a person is physically able to receive it. Am I willing to leave medical care to the doctors?

Meditation For The Day

Each moment of your day which you devote to this new way of life is a gift to God. The gift of the moments. Even when your desire to serve God is sincere, it is not an easy thing to give Him many of these moments: the daily things you had planned to do, given up gladly so that you can perform a good service or say a kind word. If you can see Gods purpose in many situations, it will be easier to give Him many moments of your day. Every situation has two interpretations — your own and God’s. Try to handle each situation in the way you believe God would have it handled.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may make my day count somewhat for God. I pray that I may not spend it all selfishly.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Owning Our Power in Relationships

So much of what I call my codependency is fear and panic because I spent so much of my life feeling abused, trapped, and not knowing how to take care of myself in relationships. –Anonymous
No matter how long we have been recovering, we may still tend to give up our power to others, whether they be authority figures, a new love, or a child.

When we do this, we experience the set of emotions and thoughts we call “the codependent crazies.” We may feel angry, guilty, afraid, confused, and obsessed. We may feel dependent and needy or become overly controlling and rigid. We may return to familiar behaviors during stress. And for those of us who have codependency and adult children issues, relationships can mean stress.

We don’t have to stay stuck in our codependency. We don’t have to shame or blame ourselves, or the other person, for our condition. We simply need to remember to own our power.

Practice. Practice. Practice using your power to take care of yourself, no matter who you are dealing with, where you are, or what you are doing. This is what recovery means. This does not mean we try to control others; it does not mean we become abrasive or abusive. It means we own our power to take care of ourselves.

The thought of doing this may generate fears. That’s normal! Take care of yourself anyway. The answers, and the power to do that, are within you now.

Start today. Start where you are. Start by taking care of who you are, at the present moment, to the best of your ability.
Today, I will focus on owning my power to take care of myself. I will not let fears, or a false sense of shame and guilt; stop me from taking care of myself.

Today I will take enough time to do something good for myself only. I will buy myself a gift or spend worthwhile time doing something pleasant and fulfilling. I have enough time today and I deserve this time for myself. –Ruth Fishel

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

To live a spiritual life we must first find the courage to enter into the desert of loneliness and to change it by gentle and persistent efforts into a garden of solitude. –Henri J. M. Nouwe

Knowing our loneliness and admitting it to us is the beginning of a spiritual path for many men. Today we are on a spiritual journey. We already have the means to translate the pain of our loneliness into a deeper spiritual dimension. Most men in this program came in deeply aware of their feelings of isolation. Now, with the companionship of our Higher Power, we can spend time alone and use it for spiritual growth. As we develop a relationship with ourselves and deepen our knowledge of our Higher Power, our loneliness transforms into solitude.

In this quiet moment today, we can be more accepting of ourselves than we were in the past. We admit loneliness has caused us pain, but now we can see that it also can lead us to our deeper self where we find serene solitude. This change is a movement into the spiritual world.

Thanks to God for the solitude I have found in my life.

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Elder’s Meditation

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Competing demands from major forces like work and family could have you wondering where you are in all of this. With pleasure-seeking Venus in your sign today, you’re drawn to pursue what feels good for you, though you’re probably blocked by your responsibilities. Fortunately, you have the room to renegotiate some obligations. Keep fairness in mind as you discuss, but also look at whether you’re doing for others things they can do for themselves — their autonomy is in everyone’s best interest!