DR – January 6, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 6, 2018:

Daily Reflection

THE VICTORY OF SURRENDER

We perceive that only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

When alcohol influenced every facet of my life, when bottles became the symbol of all my self indulgence and permissiveness, when I came to realize that, by myself, I could do nothing to overcome the power of alcohol, I realized I had no recourse except surrender. In surrender I found victory—victory over my selfish self-indulgence, victory over my stubborn resistance to life as it was given to me. When I stopped fighting anybody or anything, I started on the path to sobriety, serenity and peace.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Faith without works is dead.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, Page 76~

Keep It Simple

“We.”—First word of the Twelve Steps.

We. This little word says a lot about the Twelve Steps. Our addiction made us lonely. The “we” of the program makes us whole again. It makes us a member of a living, growing group of people. Our addiction isolated us from others. We couldn’t be honest. We felt a lot of shame. But all this is in the past. The “we” of the program helps us live outside ourselves. Now we tell each other about our pasts. We comfort each other. We try to help each other.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me to join the WE of the program. Help me to admit and accept my illness, so the healing can begin.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll work to make the WE of the program even stronger. I’ll find someone to help.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You may try to say less and listen more today, for you believe that others have plenty to teach you. However, as soon as a subject of interest comes up in a conversation, you can’t help but add your two cents to the discussion. It’s even more challenging to remain quiet if no one else is representing the truth as you see it. But don’t let everyone else always set the agenda; if you have a topic that you want to talk about, take a risk and let people know what’s on your mind. You can always kick back and learn from everyone else once you get the ball rolling.

DR – January 5, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 5, 2018:

Daily Reflection

TOTAL ACCEPTANCE

He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 152

Only an alcoholic can understand the exact meaning of a statement like this one. The double standard that held me captive as an active alcoholic also filled me with terror and confusion: “If I don’t get a drink I’m going to die,” competed with “If I continue drinking it’s going to kill me.” Both compulsive thoughts pushed me ever closer to the bottom. That bottom produced a total acceptance of my alcoholism—with no reservations whatsoever—and one that was absolutely essential for my recovery. It was a dilemma unlike anything I had ever faced, but as I found out later on, a necessary one if I was to succeed in this program.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“We represent no particular faith or denomination. We are dealing only with general principles common to most denominations.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, Page 93~

Keep It Simple

Keep It Simple

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.   –Chinese proverb.

Life holds so many choices now that we are sober. We’d like to go so many places. We’d like to see so many things. We have so much to do. We are slowly learning how to trust our dreams and reach for them. Our program teaches us that we live One Day at a Time. We make progress by doing First Things First. Easy Does It. Our dreams may seem very big and far away. We wonder if we’ll ever get there. But our faith tells us to go for it. And we know how: one step at a time.

PRAYER:
Higher Power, help me know this gentle truth: my life matters. Help me set goals that I  can grow toward, one step at a time.

ACTION:
Today, I’ll think about one of my goals. I will list ten little steps that will help me get  here.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You hope to learn all you can from people in your environment, but that doesn’t mean you want to waste time socializing. In fact, you wish you could cut away all the fluff from a conversation and go directly to the core of the matter today. Nevertheless, others might think you’re too serious for your own good. Although you don’t want to get lost in distractions, a judicious sprinkling of comic relief lightens the atmosphere and encourages everyone to smile. Maya Angelou wrote, “I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t laugh.”

DR – January 4, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 4, 2018:

Daily Reflection

BEGIN WHERE YOU ARE

We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A much more important demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations and affairs.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 19

It’s usually pretty easy for me to be pleasant to the people in an A.A. setting. While I’m working to stay sober, I’m celebrating with my fellow A.A.s our common release from the hell of drinking. It’s often not so hard to spread glad tidings to my old and new friends in the program.

At home or at work, though, it can be a different story. It is in situations arising in both of those areas that the little day-to-day frustrations are most evident, and where it can be tough to smile or reach out with a kind word or an attentive ear. It’s outside of the A.A. rooms that I face the real test of the effectiveness of my walk through A.A.’s Twelve Steps.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis
are not always easy alternatives to face.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, Page 44~

Keep It Simple

He who is swift to believe is swift to forget.-—Abraham Joshua Herschel

Life is full of questions. Many people tell us they have the answers. We have to be careful of who and what we believe. Other people’s ideas may not fit us. The program doesn’t tell us much about what to believe. It teaches us how to believe. How well the program works for us depends on what we believe and how well we live it. When we face all the facts, we can really believe. We believe we are powerless over our addiction. We believe we must and can change some things in our lives. We believe we can trust a Higher Power to care for us. When we choose to believe, we want to choose the best beliefs we can. And once we believe, we must not forget.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me know You, and help me know the truth.

Action for the Day:
Today I’ll think about my First Step. Do I truly believe I’m powerless over my disease?

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

It might feel as if people are judging you harshly before they even know your intentions. However, there is no reason to try to convince anyone that your plan is valuable today. If you are confident in your ability to see the big picture and to bring generalities down to earth, then you don’t need any input from others at this time — especially if you know it will be negative. There’s no reason to complicate your life when it’s already on track to success.

DR – January 3, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 3, 2018:

Daily Reflection

POWERLESS

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

It is no coincidence that the very first Step mentions powerlessness: An admission of personal powerlessness over alcohol is a cornerstone of the foundation of recovery. I’ve learned that I do not have the power and control I once thought I had. I am powerless over what people think about me. I am powerless over having just missed the bus. I am powerless over how other people work (or don’t work) the Steps. But I’ve also learned I am not powerless over some things. I am not powerless over my attitudes. I am not powerless over negativity. I am not powerless over assuming responsibility for my own recovery. I have the power to exert a positive influence on myself, my loved ones, and the world in which I live.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“…I would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator; that I would have the elements of a way of living which answered all my problems. Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, Page 13~

Keep It Simple

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn. —Unknown

As we work Step One, we accept that alcohol and other drugs are poison to us. We accept our limits. This means we know that hanging around our using “buddies” can remind us of “the good old days.” Hanging around “slippery places” means we could “slip” back into our old ways. This isn’t testing our sobriety; it’s being reckless with it. So let’s accept our limits. Everybody has limits. When we know our limits, we protect our recovery against the people and places that pull us from our spiritual center. This is what true acceptance means.

Prayer for the Day:
I pray for true acceptance. Higher Power, help me to stay away from slippery places. I will protect the gift You’ve given me.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll list the people and places that are risky for me to be around. I will share this list with my sponsor, my group, and my sober friends.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

A blast of certainty encourages you to take a calculated risk today. However, you may question the accuracy of your perceptions if someone wonders about the efficacy of your plan. In fact, you might be so sensitive now that even constructive criticism could send your attitude into a tailspin. Trust your intuition over someone else’s advice. Although other people’s opinions matter, they can’t make accurate judgments on the direction of your life. Caroline Myss wrote, “The more you ask for proof, the less likely you are to receive any.”

Looking Forward to 2018

On By mikeykjrIn health, Personal4 Comments

As I grow older, years come and go quickly. As many of us do, I make “New Year’s resolutions” only to fail miserably. I did so last year. While another year passes, we ring in the year of 2018 and I’m looking forward to it.

Honestly, I have regrets in 2017. However, I am reminded of the AA Promise, “We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.” In other words, I choose to learn from those mistakes and move forward.

Quick Review 2017

The older I get the more concerned I am regarding the status of my own health. As I quickly approach my 50’s, I need to make some drastic changes sooner rather than later. I continue to by plagued with high blood pressure, bad cholesterol and a whole lot of unnecessary stress in my life.  This continued throughout 2017. While I tried to quit smoking and develop a new healthy lifestyle, obviously that didn’t happen. I simply made to many excuses. All I can do is keep trying.

Working as a CNA is a stressful job in itself. Traveling three hours a day to and from work added even more stress in my life. I had to do something. In July 2017, I found the most ideal place to move and did so. I thought by doing so, I would reduce the stress in my life but that wasn’t the case.

One accomplishment I am proud of is keeping my sobriety in tact despite the many hurdles I faced. However, I have lost my connection with the physical recovery community. My work schedule (working 3pm to 11pm, now working 12-hour shifts, 7pm to 7am, four days a week) doesn’t make it easy to attend meetings (another excuse). What I didn’t do is go to meetings on my day off. Instead, I selfishly stayed at home at time “sitting on my pity pot”. I went down some dark roads but came through them with some scraps. While I won’t say “never again”, again another opportunity to learn from my mistakes.

All I can do is look forward to the new year and new possibilities. Again I’m reminded of the ending of the AA Promises, “They will always materialize if we work for them.”

New Year’s Resolutions for 2018

  • Develop a healthy lifestyle reducing the stress in my life:
    • Meditate daily
    • Exercise daily
    • Develop a healthier diet
    • Develop a regular consistent sleep schedule
  • Develop an attitude of “no excuses”; take responsibility and DO SOMETHING
  • Start and finish one project at a time
  • Eliminate procrastination

Not a long list because I really haven’t thought of anything else by the first bullet point. Developing a healthy lifestyle in 2018 is going to my second priority in life. (My sobriety is always my first priority in my life!). It ‘s not going to suddenly happen overnight. Keep it simple.

I believe I can make it work. No – I WILL make it work! This is the schedule I work with on a typical working day:

  • 5 p.m. – wake up
  • 6 p.m. – head to work
  • 7 p.m. to 7 a.m. – work
  • 7:30 to 8 a.m. – get home from work
  • 9 a.m. to 10 p.m. back to bed

After waking up, (even before my morning coffee) I’ll begin my day with a simple meditation, perhaps sobriety related, positive reinforcement or just a clear my mind. It just takes 10 – 15 minutes leaving enough time for a shower and coffee.

Getting into a regular exercise routine is going to be a challenge. Ideally I would like to do something after my meditation but as you can see, I don’t have the time.. Therefore, I’ll have to develop a routine after work.

Developing a healthier diet is going to be another challenge. I’m not a cook and I’m an impulse shopper. Honestly, I have a large pot and a small deep dish pan to cook meals (for now). In the past it was more of boxed meals and a protein. I’ll make do until I eventually buy more pots and pans. There are a plethora of websites for healthy living, so I’ll just have to try a few.

In my weekly budget I have allocated $50 per week to groceries. I think it will be more than enough, as I only cook for myself. The two cheapest places to shop are Walmart and Price Chopper. But I like to find the best deals with the use of coupons, so I’ll have to figure that all out too!

My sleeping pattern is so screwed up right now. Besides working 12 hour days, four times a week, most of the time I’ve had to stay later, even working 16 hours, due to the lack of staff at work. There is a major decision I need to make regarding my current employment but for now, I hope with the holidays past us I can get back into a regular routine.

I’m using various apps to help track my progress. For years I’ve been using Microsoft HealthVault (now call MS Insights) to keep track of my blood pressure. I’ve used MyFitnessPal in the past, so I updated all the information and will be keeping track here. Eventually I hope to add it to this blog.  If you are interested and use MyFitnessPal perhaps we can add each other? Don’t post your username or email in the comments. Just say your interested and I’ll contact you with my info. I know how to get around spam bots 🙂

This is myfitnesspal tracker:

Happy Year Year everyone!

DR – January 2, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 2, 2018:

Daily Reflection

FIRST, THE FOUNDATION

Is sobriety all that we can expect of a spiritual awakening? No, sobriety is only a bare beginning.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 8

Practicing the A.A. program is like building a house. First I had to pour a big, thick concrete slab on which to erect the house; that, to me, was the equivalent of stopping drinking. But it’s pretty uncomfortable living on a concrete slab, unprotected and exposed to the heat, cold, wind and rain. So I built a room on the slab by starting to practice the program. The first room was rickety because I wasn’t used to the work. But as time passed, as I practiced the program, I learned to build better rooms. The more I practiced, and the more I built, the more comfortable, and happy, was the home I now have to live in.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 97~

Keep It Simple

..our lives had become unmanageable.  ~ Second half of Step One.

The First Step tells us a lot about our addiction. We were out of control. Our addiction was in control. Addiction managed everything. It managed our relationships. It managed how we behaved with our families. As Step One says, “…our lives had become unmanageable.” But we pretended we managed our lives. What a lie! Addiction ran our lives–not us. We weren’t honest with ourselves. Our program heals us through self-honesty. We feel better just speaking the truth. We are becoming good people with spiritual values. Our spiritual journey has begun.

Prayer:
Higher Power, I give YOU my life to manage. When I’m faced with a choice, I’ll ask myself, “What would my Higher Power choose for me?”

Action:
Today, I’ll be honest with a friend about how unmanageable my life had become.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Although you thought things were slowing down, the pace picks up today when unforeseen events require you to shift into crisis management mode. There may be a growing resistance to your ideas from those closest to you, and it’s unwise to rock the boat. If someone in your immediate environment wants to take charge, let them. You will be more effective working behind the scenes or supporting others now. The most successful leaders know when to follow another’s lead.

DR – January 1, 2018

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for January 1, 2018:

Daily Reflection

“I AM A MIRACLE”

The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 25

This truly is a fact in my life today, and a real miracle. I always believed in God, but could never put that belief meaningfully into my life. Today, because of Alcoholics Anonymous, I now trust and rely on God, as I understand Him; I am sober today because of that! Learning to trust and rely on God was something I could never have done alone. I now believe in miracles because I am one!

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“For a brief moment, I had needed and wanted God. There had been a humble willingness to have Him with me — and He came.

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, Page 12~

Keep It Simple

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol…–First part of Step One.

In Step One, we accept our powerlessness over alcohol and other drugs. But we are powerless over many parts of life. We are powerless over other people. We are powerless over what our HP has planned for us. Before recovery, we only believed in control. We tried to control everything. We fought against a basic truth, the truth that we are powerless over much of life. When we accept this truth, we begin to see what power we do have. We have the power to make choices. When we’re lonely, we have the power to reach out to others. We have power over how we live our own lives.

PRAYER:
HP, help me to know that it’s You who is running my life. Help me to know that power comes from accepting I am powerless.

ACTION:
I am powerless over much of life. Today, I’ll look to see how this is true. I’ll look to see what I really have control over and what I don’t.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Sometimes, you must speak your mind even if you know your words will run into resistance from others. However, you might decide to keep your feelings to yourself for a while longer. Unfortunately, what starts out as common sense could turn into an excuse. Overcoming your own fear may require an act of faith, but the powerful Cancer Full Moon floods your 1st House of Self, making it more difficult to hide your emotions. Rumi wrote, “Tear off your mask. Your face is glorious.”

DR – December 31, 2017

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for December 30, 2017:

Daily Reflection

DAILY RESOLUTIONS

The idea of “twenty-four-hour living” applies primarily to the emotional life of the individual. Emotionally speaking, we must not live in yesterday, nor in tomorrow.

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 284

A New Year: 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes — a time to consider directions, goals, and actions. I must make some plans to live a normal life, but also I must live emotionally within a twenty-four-hour frame, for if I do, I don’t have to make New Year’s resolutions! I can make every day a New Year’s day! I can decide, “Today I will do this . . . Today I will do that.” Each day I can measure my life by trying to do a little better, by deciding to follow God’s will and by making an effort to put the principles of our A.A. program into action.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Remember that we deal with alcohol, cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power that One is God. May you find Him now!”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, Page 58~

Keep It Simple

May you live all the days of your life’–Jonathan Swift.

Tonight, at midnight, a New Year will begin. None of us know what the New Year will hold. But we can trust ourselves to hold on to the spirit of recovery as we go through the year. As a New Year is about to begin, we can rejoice in our new way of life. We can give our will and our life to our HP. By doing these things, we’ll be ready for the New Year.

PRAYER:
Higher Power, I pray that I’ll start the New Year safe in Your loving arms. I pray that I’ll keep working my program.

ACTION:
Tonight, at midnight, I’ll say the Serenity Prayer. I will think of all the others who have read this meditation book and who will join me in this prayer. We are a recovering community.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You’re eager to work on your objectives for the year ahead, but your rebellious attitude could stop your process in its tracks. You don’t mind when friends or relatives encourage your participation in a group activity, but everyone gets on your nerves today by demanding you have your resolutions ready to share. Once you feel like you’re pushed too far, there’s no easy way back and your only viable choice is to opt out. Fortunately, displaying your “Do Not Disturb” sign tells others to leave you alone long enough to process your feelings and reenter the game when you see fit.

DR – December 30, 2017

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for December 30, 2017:

Daily Reflection

ANONYMITY

Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 562

Tradition Twelve became important early in my sobriety and, along with the Twelve Steps, it continues to be a must in my recovery. I became aware after I joined the Fellowship that I had personality problems, so that when I first heard it, the Tradition’s message was very clear: there exists an immediate way for me to face, with others, my alcoholism and attendant anger, defensiveness, offensiveness. I saw Tradition Twelve as being a great ego-deflator; it relieved my anger and gave me a chance to utilize the principles of the program. All of the Steps, and this particular Tradition, have guided me over decades of continuous sobriety. I am grateful to those who were here when I needed them.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, Page 85~

Keep It Simple

Keep It Simple.—AA slogan

Addiction messed up our thinking. We know that from taking Step One. We forgot things. We had blackouts. We made excuses, and we even started to believe them. We were mixed up. We couldn’t figure things out. We decided to get high and forget about it. Now our minds are clear. We can keep thinking clearly if we work our program and Keep It Simple. Don’t drink or use other drugs. Go to meetings. Work the Steps. Be yourself. Ask for help. Trust your Higher Power. Two thoughts will always mess us up if we let them in. They are “Yes, but…” and “What if?” Don’t let them in. Keep It Simple.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, thanks for recovery. Help me stay sober and clean today.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll take one thing at a time and Keep It Simple.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

There is a lot of mental activity cooking behind your bright eyes, but you won’t likely share many of your thoughts today. People around you appear pleasant, but it seems as if they are containing their emotions and expect you to do the same. You can feel the dissonance between your inner restlessness and your outer restraint. Your self-imposed silence drives your attention inward and revitalizes your fantasy life. Enjoy the show for now; you’ll have a chance to talk about it soon enough.

DR – December 29, 2017

On By mikeykjrIn Daily Recovery Readings

Daily Recovery Readings for December 27, 2017:

Daily Reflection

THE JOY OF LIVING

. . . therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.’s Twelfth Step.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125

A.A. is a joyful program! Even so, I occasionally balk at taking the necessary steps to move ahead, and find myself resisting the very actions that could bring about the joy I want. I would not resist if those actions did not touch some vulnerable area of my life, an area that needs hope and fulfillment. Repeated exposure to joyfulness has a way of softening the hard, outer edges of my ego. Therein lies the power of joyfulness to help all members of A.A.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Those having religious affiliations will find here nothing disturbing to their beliefs or ceremonies. There is no friction among us over such matters.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, Page 28~

Keep It Simple

Many people are living in an emotional jail without recognizing it.  — Virginia Satir.

Our disease was our jail. We felt so bad that we were sure we must have done something awful. But we didn’t cause our disease. We have done nothing to deserve our disease. We aren’t responsible for the fact that we have a disease. But we ARE responsible for our recovery. We have been granted probation. The terms of our probation are simple: don’t drink or use other drugs, and work the Steps. If we follow these simple rules, we’ll be free. And it will be clear to us that only a Power greater than ourselves could give us this freedom.

Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, help me to stay free. For this next twenty-four – hour period, take from me any urge to drink or use other drugs. With Your help, I’ll be free.

Action for the Day:
Today, I’ll think about my disease. I am not morally weak. I have a dangerous illness. What can keep me free from my disease?

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

People are a source of common sense now and they help you stay grounded. Although you appreciate the intentions of those close to you, you may also feel oddly constrained by their comfortable presence. You cherish the familiarity and constancy of a dependable relationship, but might withdraw emotionally if you believe your options are being unnecessarily limited. Rather than thinking about next week or next year, you’re considering longer term goals that conflict with your current situation. However, there is no reason to exclude anyone, especially someone who could prove to be your greatest ally in the end.