Woke up really early this morning, not really sure why. Sometimes its dreams, people being rude or I just do. I dread days like this because later on when I want to take a nap I won’t be able. However, this morning, after posting my daily readings, it was brought to my attention I have 40 days until my first year anniversary. Time does fly by when you adopt a “One Time A Day” lifestyle.
“We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God disciplineAlcoholics Anonymous Big Book, Chapter 6 – Into Action, p.88
us in the simple way we have just outlined.”
Based on my previous experience in recovery, I knew discipline was important. I began a regular morning routine again. While the time I wake up is inconsistent, my morning ritual is not. First, got to get that coffee going, plug in the headphones and turn on some type of “morning meditation music. Most days, I enjoy the morning sunshine coming through the windows. I recite a small prayer, one of gratitude, to my Higher Power for waking me up, keeping me sober, asking for guidance throughout the day and keeping me sober. Second, I gather the various readings for my morning post and read them. At least one of them is always pertinent to what is going on in my life. Lastly, I sit still for ten minutes or more to meditate. I just sit quietly with the soothing music in the background to clear my mind of all thoughts welcoming the start of a new day sober.
However, this is not always the case. For instance, the other day, we had no creamer or milk for the coffee. Instead of doing my readings, then walking to the store, I left irritated thinking perhaps the walk to the store would do me good. I was overwhelmed with meaningless thoughts, I couldn’t concentrate. Upon coming back home, the readings and music helped to quiet my mood, my thoughts were another matter. I couldn’t wait to move into my own place so I can really enjoy peace and serenity in my life. But I also recognized it wasn’t going to happen today, thus I tried to put these thoughts in a “time out”. It wasn’t easy but I finally completed my morning routine.
Afterward, I pull up my calendar to see what’s planned for the day. Right now I have a minimal schedule – a few scattered appointments here and there but mostly meetings at noon and in the evening. I’m currently looking for a job but the listings are slim to none. However, if a job posting jumps out, I apply with no expectations of receiving an answer to my posting.
Lastly, I’m free to do whatever may pique my interest. I’m going to try to just relax and enjoy myself for the next few weeks until I get a job. Then another journey will begin.