Daily Recovery Readings
October 9, 2020
A SPIRITUAL AXIOM
It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 90
I never truly understood the Tenth Step’s spiritual axiom until I had the following experience. I was sitting in my bedroom, reading into the wee hours, when suddenly I heard my dogs barking in the back yard. My neighbors frown on this kind of disturbance so, with mixed feelings of anger and shame, as well as fear of my neighbors’ disapproval, I immediately called in my dogs. Several weeks later the exact situation repeated itself but this time, because I was feeling more at peace with myself, I was able to accept the situation—dogs will bark—and I calmly called in the dogs. Both incidents taught me that when a person experiences nearly identical events and reacts two different ways, then it is not the event which is of prime importance, but the person’s spiritual condition. Feelings come from inside,not from outward circumstances. When my spiritual condition is positive, I react positively.
From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Big Book Quote
“We agnostically inclined would not feel satisfied with a proposal which does not lend itself to reasonable approach and interpretation. Hence we are at pains to tell why we think our present faith is reasonable, why we think it more sane and logical to believe than not to believe, why we say our former thinking was soft and mushy when we threw up our hands in doubt and said, ‘We don’t know.'”
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, We Agnostics, pg. 53~
24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book
Thought for the Day
Am I willing to be bored sometimes at meetings? Am I willing to listen to much repetition of A.A. principles? Am I willing to hear the same thing over and over again? Am I willing to listen to long-winded members go into every detail of their past? Am I willing to take it, because it is doing them good to get it off their chest? My feelings are not too important. The good of A.A. comes first, even if it is not always comfortable for me. Have I learned to take it?
Meditation for the Day
God would draw us all closer to Him in the bonds of the spirit. He would have all people drawn closer to each other in the bonds of the spirit. God, the Great Spirit of the universe, of which each of our own spirits is a small part, must want unity between Himself and all His children. “Unity of the spirit in the bonds of peace.” Each experience of our life, of joy, of sorrow, of danger, of safety, of difficulty, of success, of hardship, of ease, each should be accepted as part of our common lot, in the bonds of the spirit.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may welcome the bonds of true fellowship. I pray that I may be brought closer to unity with God and other people.
The Language of Letting Go – Codependency
Learning to gently reveal who we are is how we open ourselves up to love and intimacy in our relationships.
Many of us have hidden under a protective shell, a casing that prevents others from seeing or hurting us. We do not want to be that vulnerable. We do not want to expose our thoughts, feelings, fears, weaknesses, and sometimes our strengths, to others.
We do not want others to see who we really are.
We may be afraid they might judge us, go away, or not like us. We may be uncertain that who we are is okay or exactly how we should reveal ourselves to others.
Being vulnerable can be frightening, especially if we have lived with people who abused, mistreated, manipulated, or did not appreciate us.
Little by little, we learn to take the risk of revealing ourselves. We disclose the real person within to others. We pick safe people, and we begin to disclose bits and pieces about ourselves.
Sometimes, out of fear, we may withhold, thinking that will help the relationship or will help others like us more. That is an illusion. Withholding who we are does not help the other person, the relationship, or us. Withholding is behavior that backfires. For true intimacy and closeness to exist, for us to love ourselves and be content in a relationship, we need to disclose who we are.
That does not mean we tell all to everyone at once. That can be a self-defeating behavior too. We can learn to trust ourselves, about who to tell, when to tell, where to tell, and how much to tell.
To trust that people will love and like us if we are exactly who we are is frightening. But it is the only way we can achieve what we want in relationships. To let go of our need to control others – their opinions, their feelings about us, or the course of the relationship – is the key.
Gently, like a flower, we can learn to open up. Like a flower, we will do that when the sun shines and there is warmth.
Today, I will begin to take the risk of disclosing who I am to someone with whom I feel safe. I will let go of some of my protective devices and risk being vulnerable – even though I may have been taught differently, even though I may have taught myself differently. I will disclose who I am in a way that reflects self-responsibility, self-love, directness, and honesty. God, help me let go of my fears about disclosing who I am to people. Help me accept who I am, and help me let go of my need to be who people want me to be.
Touchstone – Men’s Meditation
Nothing worse could happen to one than to be completely understood.
We so often long to be understood. We imagine it would cure our loneliness and empty feelings. We think of it as a kind of intimacy. Yet, we may be longing for a false goal. We are each a unique man on an incomplete journey. We don’t yet fully understand ourselves. There is still much mystery beneath the surface of our being. If our partners or friends completely understood us, where would we go from there? We would no longer belong to ourselves.
Perhaps we are completely understood by our Higher Power but not by another person. It is a fact of life that we continue to grow and to reveal deeper layers of ourselves. We have relationships in which we can share the mysteries as they unfold. We can talk and be understood. In communication we find our closeness and intimacy.
Today, I will remember that at the deepest level no one can fully understand me. I will communicate with others to deal with my loneliness.
“That spiritual power I wear is much more beautiful and much greater. We call it wisdom, knowledge, power and gift, or love. There are these four parts to that spiritual power. So I wear those. When you wear that power it will beautify your mind and spirit. You become beautiful. Everything that Tunkashila creates is beautiful.”
–Wallace Black Elk, LAKOTA
When I was young, I asked my grandfather, “What should I pray for?” He thought for a long time and then he said, “Pray only for wisdom and for the knowledge of love.” This makes a lot of sense. No matter what happens I ask the Creator to show me the lessons I should be learning. I pray for Him to help me learn the lessons. By doing this everyday we become beautiful human beings.
Great Spirit, grant me Your wisdom.
Daily Horoscope – Cancer
You’ve held back your feelings about a colleague for a while now, but those feelings are almost impossible to hold back today. Try not to let it all out in the wrong place at the wrong time; ask to speak to them in private instead. Depending on your professional relationship and the severity of the issue, it may be necessary to reach out to a supervisor or mediator to facilitate a restorative conversation. It may not be fixed today, but you’re on the right path.