Daily Recovery Readings
June 16, 2020

Daily Reflection

OPEN-MINDEDNESS

We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him. To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. It is open, we believe, to all men.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 46

Open-mindedness to concepts of a Higher Power can open doors to the spirit. Often I find the human spirit in various dogmas and faiths. I can be spiritual in the sharing of myself. The sharing of self joins me to the human race and brings me closer to God, as I understand Him.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 25~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

But even faith is not the whole story. There must be service. We must give this thing away if we want to keep it. The Dead Sea has no outlet and it is stagnant and full of salt. The Sea of Galilee is clear and clean and blue, as the Jordan River carries it out to irrigate the desert. To be of service to other people makes our lives worth living. Does service to others give me a real purpose in life?

Meditation for the Day

Seek God early in the day, before He gets crowded out by life’s problems, difficulties, or pleasures. In that early quiet time gain a calm, strong confidence in the goodness and purpose in the universe. Do not seek God only when the world’s struggles prove too much and too many for you to bear or face alone. Seek God early, when you can have a consciousness of God’s spirit in the world. People often only seek God when their difficulties are too great to be surmounted in any other way, forgetting that if they sought God’s companionship before they need it, many of their difficulties would never arise.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not let God be crowded out by the hurly burly of life. I pray that I may seek God early and often.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Feeling Good

Having boundaries doesn’t complicate life; boundaries simplify life.

—Beyond Codependency

There is a positive aspect to boundary setting. We learn to listen to ourselves and identify what hurt us and what we don’t like. But we also learn to identify what feels good.

When we are willing to take some risks and begin actively doing so, we will enhance the quality of our life.

What do we like? What feels good? What brings us pleasure? Whose company do we enjoy? What helps us to feel good in the morning? What’s a real treat in our life? What are the small, daily activities that make us feel nurtured and cared for?

What appeals to our emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical self? What actually feels good to us?

We have deprived ourselves too long. There is no need to do that anymore, no need. If it feels good, and the consequences are self-loving and not self-defeating, do it!

Today, I will do for myself those little things that make life more pleasurable. I will not deny myself healthy treats.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

It’s not hard. When I’m not hittin’, I don’t hit nobody. But when I’m hittin’, I hit anybody!

—Willie Mays

It seems like some days everything goes our way. Everything falls together in a way that makes life easier for us. Other days are just the opposite; on a bad day we seem to be all thumbs. In our spiritual practice we know we don’t control all that goes on around us.

We all are vulnerable to accidents, random misfortune, and illness. Yet, when we don’t fight against the events of our lives, somehow things go better for us. We can remember that as difficult as a day may be, we are never alone because nothing can separate us from our Higher Power. When we accept the bad things that come, even though they are unfair, we give them less power in our lives. Then we are free to go forward and leave more room for the good things.

Today, I’ll accept the problems I must confront and leave room for the good things.

Elder’s Meditation

“For me, the essence of a medicine man’s life is to be humble, to have great patience, to be close to the Earth, to live as simply as possible, and to never stop learning.”

–Archie Fir Lame Deer, LAKOTA

The Medicine people focus on their Being, not their doing. After all, we are human beings not human doings. The Medicine people are very patient and consciously trying to live a life of humility. Medicine people are servant leaders. Their main purpose is to serve the needs of others. By this service attitude, they become the leaders people listen to and the leaders the people want to follow. The Medicine people say everyone is their teacher. Maybe we should try to live this way ourselves; humble, patient, honoring the Earth and listening to our teachers.

Grandfather, today, let me know all people are my teachers and I am the student.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Trying to apply logic to a crazy situation will be an act in futility. Sometimes you must face the fact you’re dealing with someone who is determined to cause trouble, no matter what the cost. When this happens, it’s helpful to turn your attention inward. Although you have no control over anyone else’s behavior, you can manage your own reactions. Make it a priority to feel as best as you possibly can, regardless of the circumstances. Reflecting on a happy memory, forming an exciting plan, or savoring sensual pleasures are all good ways to lift your spirits today.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 15, 2020

Daily Reflection

MAKING A.A. YOUR HIGHER POWER

“. . .You can . . . make A.A. itself your ‘higher power.’ Here’s a very large group of people who have solved their alcohol problem. . . . many members . . . have crossed the threshold just this way. . . . their faith broadened and deepened. . . . transformed, they came to believe in a Higher Power. . . .”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 27-28

No one was greater than I, at least in my eyes, when I was drinking. Nevertheless, I couldn’t smile at myself in the mirror, so I came to A.A. where, with others, I heard talk of a Higher Power. I couldn’t accept the concept of a Higher Power because I believed God was cruel and unloving. In desperation I chose a table, a tree, then my A.A. group, as my Higher Power. Time passed, my life improved, and I began to wonder about this Higher Power. Gradually, with patience, humility and a lot of questions, I came to believe in God. Now my relationship with my Higher Power gives me the strength to live a happy, sober life.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 22~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In A.A. we have three things: fellowship, faith, and service. Fellowship is wonderful, but its wonder lasts just so long. Then some gossip, disillusionment, and boredom may come in. Worry and fear come back at times and we find that fellowship is not the whole story. Then we need faith. When we’re alone, with nobody to pat us on the back, we must turn to God for help. Can I say “Thy will be done” – and mean it?

Meditation for the Day

There is beauty in a God-guided life. There is wonder in the feeling of being led by God. Try to realize God’s bounty and goodness more and more. God is planning for you. Wonderful are His ways — they are beyond your knowledge. But God’s leading will enter your consciousness more and more and bring you ever more peace and joy. Your life is being planned and blessed by God. You may count all material things as losses if they prevent your winning your way to the consciousness of God’s guidance.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may earn the rewards of God’s power and peace. I pray that I may develop the feeling of being led by God.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Competition Between Martyrs

“Yes, I know your spouse is an alcoholic, but my son is an alcoholic, and that’s different. That’s worse!”

My pain is greater than yours!

What an easy trap that can be for us. We are out to show others how victimized we have been, how much we hurt, how unfair life is, and what tremendous martyrs we are. And we won’t be happy until we do!

We don’t need to prove our pain and suffering to anyone. We know we have been in pain. We know we have suffered. Most of us have been legitimately victimized. Many of us have had difficult, painful lessons to learn.

The goal in recovery is not to show others how much we hurt or have hurt. The goal is to stop our pain, and to share that solution with others.

If someone begins trying to prove to us how much he or she hurts, we can say simply, “It sounds like you’ve been hurt.” Maybe all that person is looking for is validation of his or her pain.

If we find ourselves trying to prove to someone how much we’ve been hurt or if we try to top someone else’s pain, we may want to stop and figure out what’s going on. Do we need to recognize how much we’ve hurt or are hurting?

There is no particular award or reward for suffering, as many of us tricked ourselves into believing in the height of our codependency. The reward is learning to stop the pain and move into joy, peace, and fulfillment.

That is the gift of recovery, and it is equally available to each of us, even if our pain was greater, or less, than someone else’s.

God, help me be grateful for all my lessons, even the ones that caused me the most pain and suffering. Help me learn what I need to learn, so I can stop the pain in my life. Help me focus on the goal of recovery, rather than the pain that motivated me into it.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“Today, what is important for us is to realize that the old sacred ways are correct, and that if we do not follow them we will be lost and without a guide.”

–Thomas Yellowtail, CROW

A long time ago the Creator gave to the people all the knowledge on how we should live and conduct ourselves. The Native people have been influenced by outside “tribes” who don’t know about the Sacred Way. Our Elders still know about the old sacred ways. We need to consult and talk to them before it’s too late. Every family needs to seriously evaluate whether they are living according to the old knowledge. If we are fault finding, putting one another down, being selfish, being violent to our spouses or children, if we are cheating and being dishonest, then we are not living the old Sacred Way. The old way is about respect, love, forgiveness and sharing.

Great Spirit, today, teach me the old Sacred Way you taught my ancestors.

Elder’s Meditation

“Today, what is important for us is to realize that the old sacred ways are correct, and that if we do not follow them we will be lost and without a guide.”

–Thomas Yellowtail, CROW

A long time ago the Creator gave to the people all the knowledge on how we should live and conduct ourselves. The Native people have been influenced by outside “tribes” who don’t know about the Sacred Way. Our Elders still know about the old sacred ways. We need to consult and talk to them before it’s too late. Every family needs to seriously evaluate whether they are living according to the old knowledge. If we are fault finding, putting one another down, being selfish, being violent to our spouses or children, if we are cheating and being dishonest, then we are not living the old Sacred Way. The old way is about respect, love, forgiveness and sharing.

Great Spirt, today, teach me the old Sacred Way you taught my ancestors.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

It can be hard for you to pursue your own path when you care so much about the feelings of others. However, holding yourself back for the sake of a loved one isn’t the answer. Don’t hesitate to pursue an exciting career opportunity today. While it may force you to spend less time with someone close to you, your relationship could actually improve. Your best friend or romantic partner may realize they’ve become overly reliant on you. Even if they don’t, they’ll start learning to do critical tasks on their own. It’s a win-win.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 14, 2020

Daily Reflection

WHEN THE GOING GETS ROUGH

It is a design for living that works in rough going.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 15

When I came to A.A., I realized that A.A. worked wonderfully to help keep me sober. But could it work on real life problems, not concerned with drinking? I had my doubts. After being sober for more than two years I got my answer. I lost my job, developed physical problems, my diabetic father lost a leg, and someone I loved left me for another — and all of this happened during a two-week period. Reality crashed in, yet A.A. was there to support, comfort, and strengthen me. The principles I had learned during my early days of sobriety became a mainstay of my life, for not only did I come through, but I never stopped being able to help newcomers. A.A. taught me not to be overwhelmed, but rather to accept and understand my life as it unfolded.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“…I humbly offered myself to God, as I then I understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I admitted for the first time that of myself I was nothing; that without Him I was lost. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and
branch.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 13~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In A.A. we have to learn that drink is our greatest enemy. Although we used to think that liquor was our friend, the time came when it turned against us and became our enemy. We don’t know just when this happened, but we know that it did because we began to get into trouble – jails and hospitals. We realize now that liquor is our enemy. Is it still my main business to keep sober?

Meditation for the Day

It is not your circumstances that need altering so much as yourself. After you have changed, conditions will naturally change. Spare no effort to become all that God would have you become. Follow every good leading of your conscience. Take each day with no backward look. Face the day’s problems with God, and seek God’s help and guidance as to what you should do in every situation that may arise. Never look back. Never leave until tomorrow the thing that you are guided to do today.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that God will help me to become all that He would have me be. I pray that I may face today’s problems with good grace.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Letting Go of Timing

“When the time is right, child.” When the time is right. How often have we heard those words – from a friend, a sponsor, our Higher Power?

We want things so badly – that job, that check, a relationship, a possession. We want our life to change.

So we wait, sometimes patiently, sometimes anxiously, wondering all the while: When will the future bring me what I long for? Will I be happy then?

We try to predict, circling dates on the calendar, asking questions. We forget that we don’t hold the answers. The answers come from God. If we listen closely, we’ll hear them. When the time is right, child. When the time is right.

Be happy now.

Today, I will relax. I am being prepared. I can let go of timing. I can stop manipulating outcomes. Good things will happen when the time is right, and they will happen naturally.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.
—Max Lerner

When we consider all of the troubles and crises in our lives and all of the scrapes we’ve gotten into, we might feel overwhelmed. With what we have gone through, it seems miraculous for many of us to be here today. When we stop feeling sorry for ourselves and when we stop complaining about the unfairness of it all, we may get a new insight: “I have survived!”

We see the strength and persistence, which brought us through the toughest times we have known. Even when some of us did not know it, we were being carried along by our Higher Power. We can draw strength from that knowledge. We can remind ourselves today that, knowing what we have lived through with the help of our Higher Power, we can deal with anything to come.

I am grateful to my Higher Power for help in surviving the hard times in life.

Elder’s Meditation

“The manner with which we walk through life is each man’s most important responsibility, and we should remember this with every new sunrise.”

–Thomas Yellowtail, CROW

Every spiritual person should carry a vision of God’s will in every area of their life. One day at a time, each morning at sunrise, we should spend time praying to the Creator. We should say something like, my Creator, this morning I ask you to show me, in terms I can understand, what you have for me to do. By doing this daily, over time, we will develop an unquestionable vision. Each person is responsible for taking the time to do this. It will bring great joy and peace of mind to those warriors who do.

My Creator, give me the vision, today, of what you want me to do.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your pioneering spirit could make a big difference in the public realm. Instead of idly sitting by and accepting things as they are, you’ll move to improve them. Whether this means running for office or creating a new committee, it will feel good to get organized and speak truth to power. The Moon, your ruling planet, is moving through your 10th House of Authority, giving your presence added strength. Even the most entrenched political figures are no match for your assertive personality. Focus on your strengths and fight clean, fair fight.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 13, 2020

Daily Reflection

LIVING OUR AMENDS

“Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic. The entire family is, to some extent, ill.”

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 122

It is important for me to realize that, as an alcoholic, I not only hurt myself, but also those around me. Making amends to my family, and to the families of alcoholics still suffering, will always be important. Understanding the havoc I created and trying to repair the destruction, will be a lifelong endeavor. The example of my sobriety may give others hope, and faith to help themselves.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Frothy emotional appeal seldom suffices. The message which can interest and hold these alcoholic people must have depth and weight. In nearly all cases, their ideals must be grounded in a power greater than themselves, if they are to re-create their lives.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Doctor’s Opinion, pg. xxviii~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In A.A. we have to reeducate our minds. We have to learn to think differently. We have to take a long view of drinking instead of a short view. We have to look through the glass to what lies beyond it. We have to look through the night before to the morning after. No matter how good liquor looks from the short view, we must realize that in the long run it is poison to us. Have I learned to look through the bottle to the better life that lies ahead?

Meditation for the Day

If you are honestly trying to live the way you believe God wants you to live, you can get guidance from God in times of quiet communion with Him, provided your thoughts are directed towards God’s will and all good things. The attitude of “Thy will, not mine, be done” leads to clear guidance. Act on this guidance and you will be led to better things. Your impulses seem to become less your own and more the leading of God’s spirit acting through your thoughts. Obeyed, they will bring you the answers to your prayers.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may try to think God’s thoughts after Him. I pray that my thoughts may be guided by His thoughts.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Hanging on to Old Relationships

We want to travel baggage-free on this journey. It makes the trip easier.

Some of the baggage we can let go of is lingering feelings and unfinished business with past relationships: anger, resentments, feelings of victimization, hurt, or longing.

If we have not put closure on a relationship, if we cannot walk away in peace, we have not yet learned our lesson. That may mean we will have to have another go around with that lesson before we are ready to move on.

We may want to do a Fourth Step (a written inventory of our relationships) and a Fifth Step (an admission of our wrongs). What feelings did we leave with in a particular relationship? Are we still carrying those feelings around? Do we want the heaviness and impact of that baggage on our behavior today?

Are we still feeling victimized, rejected, or bitter about something that happened two, five, ten, or even twenty years ago?

It may be time to let it go. It may be time to open ourselves to the true lesson from that experience. It may be time to put past relationships to rest, so we are free to go on to new, more rewarding experiences.

We can choose to live in the past, or we can choose to finish our old business from the past and open ourselves to the beauty of today.

Let go of your baggage from past relationships.

Today, I will open myself to the cleansing and healing process that will put closure on yesterday and open me to the best today, and tomorrow, has to offer in my relationships.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

You must fight off a “bad luck” way of thinking as if you were dealing with an invasion of hostile forces – for that is precisely what you are dealing with.

—Maxwell Maltz

Life is an ongoing experience with two opposing forces. One force is constantly building up, and the other is constantly tearing down. We have successes and accomplishments, and we have failures and defeats. We finally get our house in order, and it immediately begins to become disordered again.

There are forces supporting our self-esteem and forces tearing us down. Friends who wish us well, good will and generosity among people, and the momentum of our healthy actions are constructive forces in our lives. Destructive forces are the pull of old habits, bad luck, accidents, and negative thoughts. We must choose on which side we will put our energies. Are we men who hate ourselves, believe in bad luck and despair, and thereby join the forces that would tear us down? Or will we choose to be on the side that builds us up?

Today, by the grace of God, I will join the forces that are on my side. I will stand up for myself and my worth.

Elder’s Meditation

“The Old Ones have always said that no matter who despises or ignores you, no matter who keeps you from entering their circles, it is right to pray for them because the are like us, too.”

–Larry P. Aitken, CHIPPEWA

You don’t know how an apple tastes until you taste it. You don’t know what a fish tastes like until you eat it. You don’t know how it is to be a woman unless you are one. You don’t know what it means to have a baby until you have one. So it is with the natural laws. An example: the natural law of forgiveness says, if you hate someone, pray for the person to be blessed with happiness, joy and all the blessings of the Great Spirit. You will not know about this law unless you do it. The natural law says love others as you love yourself. If you hate yourself or feel guilt in some area of yourself, you will tend to judge and condemn your neighbor. You cannot give away what you don’t have. You teach your children by your example, not by your words. The natural laws are written in our hearts.

Great Spirit, teach me how to look into my heart.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your knowledge could come to the rescue today. When someone suggests a plan filled with holes, you’ll propose a better way of doing things. Everyone respects your contributions because they are bolstered by careful thought and experience. It’s possible you’ll even be offered a teaching opportunity because of the way events unfold. This job could improve your financial standing, but it may also give you a chance to further your education. Consider taking a class in something you know nothing about — growth happens outside of your comfort zone.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 12, 2020

Daily Reflection

FORMING TRUE PARTNERSHIPS

But it is from our twisted relations with family, friends, and society at large that many of us have suffered the most. We have been especially stupid and stubborn about them. The primary fact that we fail to recognize is our total inability to form a true partnership with another human being.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 53

Can these words apply to me, am I still unable to form a true partnership with another human being? What a terrible handicap that would be for me to carry into my sober life! In my sobriety I will meditate and pray to discover how I may be a trusted friend and companion.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Cessation of drinking is but the first step away from a highly strained, abnormal condition.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 122~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

When we came into A.A., we made a tremendous discovery. We found that we were sick persons rather than moral lepers. We were not such queer birds as we thought we were. We found other people who had the same illness that we had, who had been through the same experiences that we had been through. They had recovered. If they could do it, we could do it. Was hope born in me the day I walked into A.A.?

Meditation for the Day

“He that heareth these sayings and doeth them is like unto a man who built his house upon a rock and the rain descended and the floods came and the wind blew and beat upon that house and it fell not for it was founded upon a rock.” When your life is built upon obedience to God and upon doing His will, as you understand it, you will be steadfast and unmovable even in the midst of storms. The serene, steadfast, unmovable life – the rock home – is laid stone by stone – foundation, walls, and roof – by acts of obedience to the heavenly vision. The daily following of God’s guidance and the daily doing of His will build your house upon a rock.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that my life may be founded upon the rock of faith. I pray that I may be obedient to the heavenly vision.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Spontaneity and Fun

Practice being spontaneous. Practice having fun.

The joy of recovery is that we finally get to experiment. We get to learn new behaviors, and we don’t have to do them perfectly. We only need to find a way that works for us. We even have fun experimenting, learning what we like, and how to do what we like.

Many of us have gotten into a rut with rigidity, martyrdom, and deprivation. One of the “normal” experiences many of us have been deprived of is having fun. Another one is being spontaneous. We may not have the foggiest notion what we would like to do for fun. And we may hold ourselves in check so tightly that we wouldn’t allow ourselves to try something fun anyway.

We can let ourselves go a little now and then. We can loosen up a bit. We don’t have to be so stiff and rigid, so frightened about being who we are. Take some risks. Try some new activities. What would we like to do? What might we enjoy doing? Then, take another risk. Pick out a movie we’d like to see; call a friend, and invite him or her to go along. If that person says no, try someone else, or try again another time.

Decide to try something, and then go through with it. Go once. Go twice. Practice having fun until fun becomes fun.

Today, I will do something just for fun. I will practice having fun until I actually enjoy it.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Originality is unexplored territory. You get there by carrying a canoe – you can’t take a taxi.

—Alan Alda

We are on an adventure trip in this program. Each of us is a wilderness that is only partly explored and mapped. We can’t know exactly what we will find along the way, but we can expect to find some great and moving beauty, some spectacular experiences, as well as awesome and frightening ones, and some soft, pleasant rest spots. Any day will have a mixture of various feelings.

This program is not a map of the uncharted territory. It is a guide for survival in the wilderness. It tells us how to orient ourselves when there are no familiar landmarks and how to learn and grow from the experience. The more time we spend in this wilderness, exploring the mystery of living, the more comfortable we become with it and the greater appreciation we have for its unique beauty.

Today, I pray for the courage to explore the original person I was created to be.

Elder’s Meditation

“The faces of our future generations are looking up to us from the earth and we step with great care not to disturb our grandchildren.”

–Traditional Circle of Elders

The leaves, when they are finished with their life on the trees, will return to the Earth. The leaves that return to the Earth are the future trees. So inside the Mother Earth are the future forests. The human, when finished with its life on the Earth, will return to the Earth. So in the Earth are our future grandchildren. Knowing this, we should be respectful of the place where our future generations live. Only take from the Earth what you need. Every time you pick a plant or Medicine, leave an offering and leave a prayer. Be respectful and walk in a sacred way.

Great Spirit, teach me to respect the place of future generations.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

There’s support available that you haven’t tapped into yet. Delving into a different belief system will open up new ways of looking at your situation. Whether this approach is spiritual, philosophical, or religious, it’s important you have faith in it, even if it goes against the practices you were raised with. It’s likely your family won’t feel threatened by your decision to go in a different direction now. You’re a thoughtful person who has always gone the extra mile to make others feel comfortable. Now that you need support, your loved ones may be happy to provide it in return.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 11, 2020

Daily Reflection

FAMILY OBLIGATIONS

. . . a spiritual life which does not include. . . family obligations may not be so perfect after all.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 129

I can be doing great in the program — applying it at meetings, at work, and in service activities — and find that things have gone to pieces at home. I expect my loved ones to understand, but they cannot. I expect them to see and value my progress, but they don’t — unless I show them. Do I neglect their needs and desires for my attention and concern? When I’m around them, am I irritable or boring? Are my “amends” a mumbled “Sorry,” or do they take the form of patience and tolerance? Do I preach to them, trying to reform or “fix” them? Have I ever really cleaned house with them? “The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it”(Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 83).

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Selfishnessself-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of
our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self- seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 62~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We alcoholics have to believe in some Power greater than ourselves. Yes, we have to believe in God. Not to believe in a Higher Power drives us to atheism. Atheism, it has been said before, is blind faith in the strange proposition that this universe originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. That’s practically impossible to believe. So we turn to that Divine Principle in the universe that we call God. Have I stopped trying to run my own life?

Meditation for the Day

“Lord, we thank Thee for the great gift of peace, that peace which passeth all understanding, that peace which the world can neither give nor take away.” That is the peace that only God can give in the midst of a restless world and surrounded by trouble and difficulty. To know that peace is to have received the stamp of the kingdom of God. When you have earned that peace, you are fit to judge between true and false values, between the values of the kingdom of God and the values of all that the world has to offer.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that today I may have inner peace. I pray that today I may be at peace with myself.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Moving Forward

Much as we would like, we cannot bring everyone with us on this journey called recovery. We are not being disloyal by allowing ourselves to move forward. We don’t have to wait for those we love to decide to change as well.

Sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to grow, even though the people we love are not ready to change. We may even need to leave people behind in their dysfunction or suffering because we cannot recover for them. We don’t need to suffer with them.

It doesn’t help.

It doesn’t help for us to stay stuck just because someone we love is stuck. The potential for helping others is far greater when we detach, work on ourselves, and stop trying to force others to change with us.

Changing ourselves, allowing ourselves to grow while others seek their own path, is how we have the most beneficial impact on people we love. We’re accountable for ourselves. They’re accountable for themselves. We let them go, and let ourselves grow.

Today, I will affirm that it is my right to grow and change, even though someone I love may not be growing and changing alongside me.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We are each so much more than what some reduce to measuring.
—Karen Kaiser Clark

Our society places great emphasis on how well each person is doing. It makes us judgmental and competitive. As children we may have thought that our real value was measured by the grades we got in school or the scores of our baseball games. As grown men we continue measuring our worth by things like the size of our wages, the model of the car we drive, or even how many months or years we have in recovery.

We can’t stop the measuring, but we are in a program that helps us step outside this system. We seek to know and do the will of our Higher Power, which is beyond the limitations of such measurements. Submitting our own will to our Higher Power releases us from the competition and the judgments in these games of measurement. Our loyalties are to values like honesty, respect, peace, and wholeness.

Today, I will remember that my value as a man isn’t measured on a man-made scale.

Elder’s Meditation

“Behold, my bothers, the spring has come; the earth has received the embraces of the sun and we shall soon see the results of that love!”

–Sitting Bull, SIOUX

Spring is the season of love. Spring is the season of new life, new relationships. It is the springtime that really reacts to the new position of Father Sun. New life forms all over the planet. Life is abundant. New cycles are created. Mother Earth changes colors, the flowers are abundant. It is the time for humans to observe nature and let nature create within us the feeling of Spring. We should let ourselves renew. We should let go of the feeling of Winter. We should be joyful and energetic.

My Maker, let me, today, feel the feelings of Spring.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

As deeply connected as you are to your roots, abandoning some of the beliefs that were imposed on you as a child can be liberating now. It’s important to develop a moral of your own, but this could cause some discomfort with a few family members. Make it clear that your philosophy isn’t a rejection of them, you’re simply trying to make your own way. Eventually, your loved ones may admire your desire to build an ethical code, even if it differs from theirs. This quest is a testament to your good character

Daily Recovery Readings
June 10, 2020

Daily Reflection

IMPATIENT? TRY LEVITATING

“We reacted more strongly to frustrations than normal people.”

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 111

Impatience with other people is one of my principal failings. Following a slow car in a no-passing lane, or waiting in a restaurant for the check, drives me to distraction. Before I give God a chance to slow me down, I explode, and that’s what I call being quicker than God. That repeated experience gave me an idea. I thought if I could look down on these events from God’s point of view, I might better control my feelings and behavior. I tried it and when I encountered the next slow driver, I levitated and looked down on the other car and upon myself. I saw an elderly couple driving along, happily chatting about their grandchildren. They were followed by me — bug-eyed and red of face — who had no time schedule to meet anyway. I looked so silly that I dropped back into reality and slowed down. Seeing things from God’s angle of vision can be very relaxing.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 98~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

If we have had some moral, religious, or spiritual training, we’re better prospects for A.A. When we reach the bottom, at this crucial moment when we’re thoroughly licked, we turn instinctively to whatever decency is left in us. We call upon whatever reserves of morality and faith are left down deep in our heart. Have I had this spiritual experience?

Meditation for the Day

The world wonders when it sees a person who can unexpectedly draw large and unsuspected sums from the bank for some emergency. But what the world has not seen are the countless small sums paid into that bank, earned by faithful work over a long time. And so is the bank of the spirit. The world sees the person of faith make a demand on God’s stores of power and the demand is met. The world does not see what that person has been putting in, in thanks and praise, in prayer and communion, in small good deeds done faithfully, steadily over the years.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may keep making deposits in God’s bank. I pray that in my hour of need, I may call upon these.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Responsibility

Self care means taking responsibility for ourselves. Taking responsibility for ourselves includes assuming our true responsibilities to others.

Sometimes, when we begin recovery, we’re worn down from feeling responsible for so many other people. Learning that we need only take responsibility for ourselves may be such a great relief that, for a time, we disown our responsibilities to others.

The goal in recovery is to find the balance: we take responsibility for ourselves, and we identify our true responsibilities to others.

This may take some sorting through, especially if we have functioned for years on distorted notions about our responsibilities to others. We may be responsible to one person as a friend or as an employee; to another person, we’re responsible as an employer or as a spouse. With each person, we have certain responsibilities. When we tend to those true responsibilities, we’ll find balance in our life.

We are also learning that while others aren’t responsible for us, they are accountable to us in certain ways.

We can learn to discern our true responsibilities for ourselves, and to others. We can allow others to be responsible for themselves and expect them to be appropriately responsible to us.

We’ll need to be gentle with ourselves while we learn.

Today, I will strive for clear thinking about my actual responsibilities to others. I will assume these responsibilities as part of taking care of myself.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

We learn more by seeing someone play good tennis than by reading a book about how to play good tennis.

—W. Timothy Gallwey

In our program we learn from each other. Most of us would rather have thought our problems through on our own or read about them without having to ask for help. Recovery requires us to break this old habit. We can no longer say at a meeting, “I had some problems this week, but I’ve worked them out now” or “I know what I have to do.” The change for us is to ask for help from other men in this program. We need to say, “What do you think about my problem?” or “Would you be willing to talk to me for a while?”

Having a sponsor is an important way of getting to know how another man applies his program to his life. We need to select a sponsor we admire, who has learned the Steps well and who truly lives them. Then we need to spend time with our sponsor outside of meetings, perhaps while drinking a cup of coffee or going for a walk. By associating with others who are diligent about recovery, we will learn more than we could any other way.

Today, I will make personal contact with others in this program.

Elder’s Meditation

“Each day, whatever I am doing, I am always praying and thinking of God.”

–Thomas Yellowtail, CROW

Have you ever tried going through your day and carrying on a conversation with the Creator? Many of our Elders live in prayer. They talk to the Creator like the Creator is their best friend. It is easiest to do this if we pray in the morning and ask the Great Spirit to direct our thinking. When the Creator is involved in guiding our lives, we will have less stress, anxiety, and tension. Maybe this is something we would like to try today. “Oh, Creator, look at the Sun, how beautiful you have made it. Oh, look at this child, isn’t she just beautiful! Well, Creator, I’m not sure how I should do this task, what do you think? This person is starting to irritate me; I need your help to redirect my thinking. Thanks for returning me to a peaceful mind.” Remember, the Creator also has a sense of humor.

Grandfather, Grandmother, let me walk in prayer.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Slinking away for some quiet time in solitude could be just what you need to regain peace now. Although you’re always concerned with the welfare of your nearest and dearest, taking care of everyone else’s needs is draining to your energy. Take this opportunity to recharge your batteries. You work hard to make your surroundings comfortable and restful, so curl up and enjoy the fruits of your labor. Turn off your phone and stay off of social media. Do whatever feels good to you; the simplest things can bring the greatest enjoyment today.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 9, 2020

Daily Reflection

LIVING IN THE NOW

“First, we try living in the now just in order to stay sober — and it works. Once the idea has become a part of our thinking, we find that living life in 24-hour segments is an effective and satisfying way to handle many other matters as well.“

— LIVING SOBER, p. 7

“One Day At A Time.” To a newcomer this and other one-liners of A.A. may seem ridiculous. The passwords of the A.A. Fellowship can become lifelines in moments of stress. Each day can be like a rose unfurling according to the plan of a Power greater than myself. My program should be planted in the right location, just as it will need to be groomed, nourished, and protected from disease. My planting will require patience, and my realizing that some flowers will be more perfect than others. Each stage of the petals’ unfolding can bring wonder and delight if I do not interfere or let my expectations override my acceptance — and this brings serenity.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, “a design for living” that really works.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 28~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

We finally came to the bottom. We did not have to be financially broke, although many of us were. But we were spiritually bankrupt. We had a soul sickness, a revulsion against ourselves and against our way of living. Life had become impossible for us. We had to end it all or do something about it. Am I glad I did something about it?

Meditation for the Day

Faith is not seeing, but believing. I am in a box of space and time and cannot see spacelessness or eternity. But God is not within the shell of time and space. He is timeless and spaceless. He cannot be fully comprehended by our finite minds. But we must try to make a union between our purposes and the purposes of God. By trying to merge our minds with the mind of God, a oneness of purpose results. This oneness of purpose puts us in harmony with God and others. Evil comes from being in disharmony with God and good comes from being in harmony with Him.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be in harmony with God. I pray that I may get into the stream of goodness in the universe.
From Twenty-Four Hours a Day © 1975 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Panic

“Few situations – no matter how greatly they appear to demand it – can be bettered by us going berserk.’

—Codependent No More

Don’t panic!

If a swimmer was crossing a great lake, then suddenly focused too heavily on the distance remaining, he might start to flounder and go under – not because he couldn’t swim, but because he became overwhelmed by panic.

Panic, not the task, is the enemy.

Many of us have moments when we feel crowded and overwhelmed. We have times when we feel like we cannot possibly accomplish all that needs to be done.

We may be facing a task at work, an improvement in ourselves, or change in our family life.

For a moment, it is helpful to look forward and envision the project. It is normal, when we look ahead at what needs to be done, to have moments of panic. Feel the fear, then let it go. Take our eyes off the future and the enormity of the task. If we have envisioned the goal, it will be ours. We do not have to do everything today, or at once.

Focus on today. Focus on the belief that all is well. All we need to do to reach our goal is to focus on what presents itself naturally, and in an orderly way, to us today. We shall be empowered to accomplish, peacefully, what we need to get where we want to be tomorrow.

Panic will stop this process. Trust and guided action will further it. Breathe deeply. Get peaceful. Trust. Act as guided, today.

We can get back on track by treading water until we regain our composure. Once we feel peaceful, we can begin swimming again, with confidence. Keep the focus simple, on one stroke, one movement at a time. If we can make one movement, we have progressed. If we get tired, we can float — but only if we are relaxed. Before we know it, we shall reach the shore.

Today, I will believe that all is well. I am being led, but I shall only be led one day at a time. I will focus my energy on living this day to the best of my ability. If panic arises, I will stop all activity and deal with panic as a separate issue.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“I believe our concept of romantic love is irrational, impossible to fulfill, and the cause of many broken homes. No human being can maintain that rarified atmosphere of ‘true love’.”

—Rita Mae Brown

What the popular media teach us about marriage and love is poor preparation for the real thing. When we enter a relationship we may be filled with a feeling of magic and excitement of new love. But that is not a good basis for a lifelong commitment. Love at first sight is no reason for marriage. Many of us, upon meeting difficulties in our relationships, said to ourselves, “Maybe it wasn’t true love after all, because now I don’t feel in love with my mate anymore.”

Honesty and learning how to resolve difficulties provide a solid foundation for durable love. Some relationships do not survive the honesty of recovery. Sometimes the development of honest love only begins with recovery. The love that endures, the love of real intimacy, comes when we know the real person. Loyalty to our loved ones may deepen as we deal more and more with reality.

As I grow in this program, married or single, I become more able to have an enduring love.

Elder’s Meditation

“Every part of this country is sacred to my people. Every hillside, every valley, every plain and grove has been hallowed by some fond memory or some sad experience of my tribe. Even the rocks, which seem to lie dumb as they swelter in the sun along the silent shore in solemn grandeur, thrill with memories of past events connected with the fate of my people.“

—Chief Seattle, SUQUAMISH

Native people say the Earth is sacred. Some places on Earth will feel more sacred than others. You can often feel the sacredness of these places because of what has happened on them. If you do a ceremony on a certain place and return later, whatever happened before will still be there to help you. Even if someone you didn’t know did something on the Earth and you come along later, the powers will be there to help you. This is why the Earth is sacred and these special places are sacred spots.

My Creator, let the powers of the sacred places help the people today.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Relaxing may not be an option today. If you’re the only one who can perform a certain task, muster up your energy and get to it. A negative outlook will create a negative experience, so be as optimistic as you can to set a better tone. When you’ve fulfilled your responsibilities, there will be a chance to indulge in creature comforts. Buy yourself a gift that acts as an activity and excites your imagination, like a new book or an art set. Engaging your mind enhances your mood and your presence with others. It’s a win-win.

Daily Recovery Readings
June 8, 2020

Daily Reflection

OPENING UP TO CHANGE

“Self-searching is the means by which we bring new vision, action, and grace to bear upon the dark and negative side of our natures. With it comes the development of that kind of humility that makes it possible for us to receive God’s help. . . . we find that bit by bit we can discard the old life — the one that did not work — for a new life that can and does work under any conditions whatever.“

— AS BILL SEES IT, pp. 10, 8

I have been given a daily reprieve contingent upon my spiritual condition, provided I seek progress, not perfection. To become ready for change, I practice willingness, opening myself to possibilities of change. If I realize there are defects that hinder my usefulness in A.A. and toward others, I become ready by meditating and receiving direction. “Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely” ( Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 58). To let go and let God, I need only surrender my old ways to Him; I no longer fight nor do I try to control, but simply believe that, with God’s help, I am changed and affirming this belief makes me ready. I empty myself to be full of awareness, light, and love, and I am ready to face each day with hope.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Big Book Quote

“If we are sorry for what we have done, and have the honest desire to let God take us to better things, we believe we will be forgiven and will have learned our lesson. If we are not sorry, and our conduct continues to harm others, we are quite sure to drink. We are not theorizing. These are facts out of our experience.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 70~

24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. We always get worse, never better. We are never cured. Our alcoholism can only be arrested. No matter how long we have been sober, if we try liquor again, we’re as bad or worse than we ever were. There is no exception to this rule in the whole history of A.A. We can never recapture the good times of the past. They are gone forever. Will I try to recapture them?

Meditation for the Day

Your life has been given to you mainly for the purpose of training your soul. This life we live is not so much for the body as for the soul. We often choose the way of life that best suits the body, not the way that best suits the soul. God wants you to choose what suits the soul as well as the body. Accept this belief and a wonderful molding of character is the result. Reject it and God’s purpose for your life is frustrated, and your spiritual progress is delayed. Your soul is being trained by the good you choose. Thus the purpose of your life is being accomplished.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may choose what is good for my soul. I pray that I may realize God’s purpose for my life.

The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Fun

Have some fun – with life, with the day.

Life is not drudgery; that is an old belief. Let go of it. We are on an adventure, a journey. Events will come to pass that we cannot now fathom.

Replace heaviness and weariness of spirit with joy. Surround yourself with people and things that bring lightness of spirit.

Become sensitive to lightness of spirit.

The journey can be an exciting adventure. Let yourself enjoy it.

God, help me let go of my need to meet dysfunctional challenges in my relationships.

Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“Come, Love! Sing On! Let me hear you sing this song – sing for joy and laugh, for I the creator am truly subject to all creatures.“

—Mechtild of Magdeburg

Recovery without joy and song and playfulness is incomplete. The beauty of music uplifts our spirits and shows us the face of our Creator. For many men, music is their means of meditation and conscious contact with their Higher Power. When we experience the creativity of a musical piece, as it speaks to us, we take a step beyond the practical world, into the profound level of creation.

Some people say, “How can you celebrate when there is so much suffering, so much to grieve about?” We have grieved; we continue to grieve alongside our joy. But we need not pour all our energies into the painful and sad. Life is also wonderful. Music and dance and the joy of good fellowship enrich our lives and strengthen us to go on.

Praise the spirit of our Creator for all that is given to us!

Elder’s Meditation

“So we are connected to the moon. That gives us power, a connection to the Earth and the moon, men don’t know about.”

–Cecilia Mitchell, MOHAWK

The Elders tell us that the Woman has access to special powers. The Earth Mother gives her love in a special way to the Woman. The Moon also gives special powers to the Woman. She uses these powers to nurture, heal, and guide the people.

Great Spirit, today, give a special Blessing to our Women.

Daily Horoscope – Cancer

A relationship with a unique and innovative person in your life is highlighted today. You’ve always appreciated this person’s unusual outlook and ability to perceive the next big thing. Play to their strengths, especially if this is a working relationship. Meanwhile, it’s possible your best friend, romantic partner, or business associate is reaching exhaustion and needs your support. By taking some responsibilities off their plate, you’ll give them a chance to regain their equilibrium. Soon, they’ll be laughing and making jokes again and your relationship will be back to normal, thanks to your devotion.