Daily Recovery Readings
January 24, 2020

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Daily Reflection

GETTING INVOLVED

“There is action and more action. “Faith without works is dead.” . . . To be helpful is our only aim.“

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 88-89

I understand that service is a vital part of recovery but I often wonder, “What can I do?” Simply start with what I have today! I look around to see where there is a need. Are the ashtrays full? Do I have hands and feet to empty them? Suddenly I’m involved! The best speaker may make the worst coffee; the member who’s best with newcomers may be unable to read; the one willing to clean up may make a mess of the bank account—yet every one of these people and jobs is essential to an active group. The miracle of service is this: when I use what I have, I find there is more available to me than I realized before.

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Big Book Quote

“Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Bill’s Story, pg. 14~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Alcoholics who are living in a blind alley refuse to be really honest with themselves or with other people. They’re running away from life and won’t face things as they are. They won’t give up their resentments. They’re too sensitive and too easily hurt. They refuse to try to be unselfish. They still want everything for themselves. And no matter how many disastrous experiences they have had with drinking, they still do it over and over again. There’s only one way to get out of that blind alley way of living and that’s to change your thinking. Have I changed my thinking?

Meditation for the Day

I know that the vision and power that I receive from God are limitless, as far as spiritual things are concerned. But in temporal and material things, I must submit to limitations. I know that I cannot see the road ahead. I must go just one step at a time, because God does not grant me a longer view. I am in uncharted waters, limited by my temporal and spatial life, but unlimited in my spiritual life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that, in spite of my material limitations, I may follow God’s way. I pray that I may learn that trying to do His will is perfect freedom.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Clearing the Slate

One of the greatest gifts we can give is an open, loving heart. And holding on to negative feelings from past relationships is our greatest barrier to that gift.

Most of us have had relationships that have ended. When we examine these relationships, we need to clear the emotional slate. Are we holding on to anger or resentments? Are we still feeling victimized? Are we living with the self-defeating beliefs that may be attached to these relationships – Women can’t be trusted…. Bosses use people…. There is no such thing as a good relationship….

Let go of all that may be blocking your relationships today. With great certainty, we can know that old feelings and self-defeating beliefs will block us today from giving and getting the love we desire. We can clear the slate of the past. It begins with awareness, honesty, and openness. The process is complete when we reach a state of acceptance and peace toward all from our past.

Today, I will begin the process of letting go of all self-defeating feelings and beliefs connected to past relationships. I will clear my slate so I am free to love and be loved.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“You have got to know what it is you want, or someone is going to sell you a bill of goods somewhere along the line that can do irreparable damage to your self esteem, your sense of worth, and your stewardship of the talents that God gave you.”

—Richard Nelson Bolles

In recovery, getting to know ourselves sometimes means developing a new form of toughness. As we deepen our relationships with ourselves, we have a clearer sense of what we care about, what is truly important, and what is not. Certainly we have learned there is evil in the world. Harm does come to good people and the good side does not always win. So we must be men who know ourselves and are not pushovers when our basic values and needs are challenged. We leave room for being wrong, and we continue to grow and learn. But we stand up for what we believe as we see it today.

We must not join the forces that would put us down or destroy us. Those negative forces are within us more often than they are outside. Wherever they come from, knowing clearly what we want and care about is our strongest defense.

I will seek the wisdom to know my values and the strength to defend my beliefs.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Always listen to what the Elders say.”

–Dona Josefa Medrano, HUICHOL, SIERRA MADRE, MEXICO

In school we have been taught to go to the encyclopedia when we need information about certain subjects. From the time we are little, we have a natural tendency to seek out role models. When we need information about living we tend to seek out books about living. These maybe self help books. The world is full of information. For the Native people, we have our Elders. All races have Elders. Our lives will run much smoother when we listen to the Elders. They don’t always tell us what we want to hear, but they always tell us what we need to hear. The Elders have the ability to make the truth sweet.

Creator, thank You for the Elders. Help me this day to listen to them.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You may be an expert when it comes to keeping feelings close to your chest. Although your fear of being misunderstood or rejected might often be your reason for remaining quiet, these are not your concerns now. The independent Aquarius New Moon accentuates your 8th House of Transformation, initiating a new cycle of personal growth — and you prefer to process your changing emotions privately. But don’t make the mistake of using your silence as a way to avoid the inner work at hand. Poet William Wordsworth wrote, “Your mind is the garden, your thoughts are the seeds, the harvest can either be flowers or weeds.”

Daily Recovery Readings
January 22, 2020

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Daily Reflection

HAVING FUN YET?

. . . we aren’t a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn’t want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world’s troubles on our shoulders.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 132

When my own house is in order, I find the different parts of my life are more manageable. Stripped from the guilt and remorse that cloaked my drinking years, I am free to assume my proper role in the universe, but this condition requires maintenance. I should stop and ask myself, Am I having fun yet? If I find answering that question difficult or painful, perhaps I’m taking myself too seriously—and finding it difficult to admit that I’ve strayed from my practice of working the program to keep my house in order. I think the pain I experience is one way my Higher Power has to get my attention, coaxing me to take stock of my performance. The slight time and effort it takes to work the program—a spot-check inventory, for example, or the making of amends, whatever is appropriate — are well worth the effort.

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Big Book Quote

“Those of us who have spent much time in the world of spiritual make-believe have eventually seen the childishness of it. This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose, accompanied by a growing consciousness of the power of God in our lives. We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.”

~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 130~

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

Alcoholics are people whose drinking got them into a “blind alley.” They haven’t been able to learn anything from their drinking experiences. They are always making the same mistakes and suffering the same consequences over and over again. They refuse to admit they’re alcoholic. They still think they can handle the stuff. They won’t swallow their pride and admit that they’re different from ordinary drinkers. They won’t face the fact that they must spend the rest of their lives without liquor. They can’t visualize life without ever taking a drink. Am I out of this blind alley?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that God has all power. It is His to give and His to withhold. But He will not withhold it from the person who dwells near Him, because then it passes insensibly from God to that person. It is breathed in by the person who lives in God’s presence. I will learn to live in God’s presence and then I will have those things, which I desire, of Him: strength, power, and joy. God’s power is available to all who need it and are willing to accept it.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may get myself out of the way, so that God’s power may flow in. I pray that I may surrender myself to that power.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

New Energy Coming

Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, and life becomes worth living. And we become grateful.

—Beyond Codependency

There is a new energy, a new feeling coming into our life. We cannot base our expectations about how we will feel tomorrow, or even a few hours from now, on how we feel at this moment.

There are no two moments in time alike. We are recovering. We are changing. Our life is changing. At times, things haven’t worked out the way we wanted. We had lessons to learn. The future shall not be like the past.

The truly difficult times are almost over. The confusion, the most challenging learning experiences, the difficult feelings are about to pass.

Do not limit the future by the past!

Reflect on the beginning of your recovery. Haven’t there been many changes that have brought you to where you are now? Reflect on one year ago. Haven’t you and your circumstances changed since then?

Sometimes, problems and feelings linger for a while. These times are temporary. Times of confusion, uncertainty, times of living with a particular unsolved problem do not last forever.

We make these times doubly hard by comparing them to our past. Each situation and circumstance has had its particular influence in shaping who we are. We do not have to scare ourselves by comparing our present and future to a painful past, especially our past before we began recovering or before we learned through a particular experience.

Know that the discomfort will not be permanent. Do not try to figure out how you shall feel or when you shall feel differently. Instead, trust. Accept today, but do not be limited by it.

A new energy is coming. A new feeling is on the way. We cannot predict how it will be by looking at how it was or how it is, because it shall be entirely different. We have not worked and struggled in vain. It has been for and toward something.

Times are changing for the better. Continue on the path of trust and obedience. Be open to the new.

Today, God, help me not judge or limit my future by my past. Help me be open to all the exciting possibilities for change, both within and around me.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Spontaneity is the quality of being able to do something just because you feel like it at the moment, of trusting your instincts, of taking yourself by surprise and snatching from the clutches of your well-organized routine a bit of unscheduled pleasure.

—Richard Lannelli

The idea of turning our lives and our will over to the care of God is a very revolutionary thing to do. We are being told, “Let go of your excessive carefulness. Let the spirit guide you.” When we are in touch with ourselves, with the people around us, with God, we are free to experiment. We don’t learn from doing the same things correctly again and again. We learn from trying new things and making mistakes.

Over control is spiritually deadening. This is a program of life. Our renewal is a miraculous event. Why stop now? We can be in touch with the messages around us without trying to control the outcome. When we let God do the worrying, we find many possibilities open up,

As this adventure of life unfolds, I will not shy away from it.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Our true enemies, as well as our true sources of strength, lie within.”

–Willaru Huayta, QUECHUA NATION, PERU

A long time ago, the Creator put inside the human being the secrets to the laws of life. We usually know this is true even though we may not know what these laws are. If something goes wrong with our lives, we usually fix the blame on something outside of ourselves. We tend to give up accountability. One way or another we say, “It’s not my fault.” We need to realize that all permanent and lasting change starts on the inside and works its way out. If it’s meant to be, it is up to me.

Oh Great Spirit, let me realize fully that my problems are of my own making. Therefore, so are the solutions.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Knowing the difference between getting down to business and taking yourself too seriously is key to your success today. When you’re in the productive zone and following through with your priorities, you can easily accomplish your goals. However, someone else may have a very different idea of what you should be doing with your time and you might need to address their expectations before returning to your work. You will likely find yourself in a counterproductive cycle if you become excessively involved with other people’s issues. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”

Daily Recovery Readings
January 22, 2020

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Daily Reflection

“LET’S KEEP IT SIMPLE”

A few hours later I took my leave of Dr. Bob. . . . The wonderful, old, broad smile was on his face as he said almost jokingly, “Remember, Bill, let’s not louse this thing up. Let’s keep it simple!” I turned away, unable to say a word. That was the last time I ever saw him.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE, p. 214

After years of sobriety I occasionally ask myself: “Can it be this simple?” Then, at meetings, I see former cynics and skeptics who have walked the A.A. path out of hell by packaging their lives, without alcohol, into twenty-four hour segments, during which they practice a few principles to the best of their individual abilities. And then I know again that, while it isn’t always easy, if I keep it simple, it works.

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Big Book Quote

“…we aren’t a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn’t want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 132

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In the beginning, you want to get sober, but you’re helpless, so you turn to a Power greater than yourself and by trusting in that Power, you get the strength to stop drinking. From then on, you want to keep sober, and that’s a matter of reeducating your mind. After a while, you get so that you really enjoy simple, healthy, normal living. You really get a kick out of life without the artificial stimulus of alcohol. All you have to do is to look around at the members of any A.A. group and you will see how their outlook has changed. Is my outlook on life changing?

Meditation for the Day

I will never forget to say thank you to God, even on the greyest days. My attitude will be one of humility and gratitude. Saying thank you to God is a daily practice that is absolutely necessary. If a day is not one of thankfulness, the practice has to be repeated until it becomes so. Gratitude is a necessity for those who seek to live a better life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that gratitude will bring humility. I pray that humility will bring me to live a better life.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Appreciating Our Past

It is easy to be negative about past mistakes and unhappiness. But it is much more healing to look at ourselves and our past in the light of experience, acceptance, and growth. Our past is a series of lessons that advance us to higher levels of living and loving.

The relationships we entered, stayed in, or ended taught us necessary lessons. Some of us have emerged from the most painful circumstances with strong insights about who we are and what we want.

Our mistakes? Necessary. Our frustrations, failures, and sometimes-stumbling attempts at growth and progress? Necessary too.

Each step of the way, we learned. We went through exactly the experiences we needed to, to become who we are today. Each step of the way, we progressed.

Is our past a mistake? No. The only mistake we can make is mistaking that for the truth.

Today, God, help me let go of negative thoughts I may be harboring about my past circumstances or relationships. I can accept, with gratitude, all that has brought me to today.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

The human heart in its perversity finds it hard to escape hatred and revenge.

—Moses Luzzatto

This program promises many rewards for those who follow it, but it does not promise to be easy. We search our conscience for resentments and face them. No man can progress in his recovery while holding onto resentments, old angers, and hatreds. When we hold them, we protect dark corners of our souls from the renewal we need. As we allow ourselves to be made new through this program, we no longer reserve those small corners for the game of power and resentment. They will eventually consume us and justify in our minds a return to the old patterns.

Nothing can be held back. We must be willing to surrender all – even if we do not know how. No one can stop being resentful simply by deciding to stop. When we are willing to be honest, to be humble, to be learners, to be led in a constructive direction, to allow time to be guided rather than seek instant cure, then we will learn trust and will surely make progress.

I do not need to know exactly how to let go of my resentments or what will happen afterI do. I simply must be ready to let them go.

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Elder’s Meditation

“The first factor in the revolution of consciousness is the mystic death of the ego – the death of negative thinking, negative personalities. We must purify the soul of the inner enemies. Every time a defect manifests – envy, gluttony, anger, lust, whatever – that impulse to the heart. Ask, `Do I really need to invoke this?’ And then honor the heart.”

–Willaru Huayta, QUECHAU NATION, PERU

Our egos have character defects. These character defects we sometimes act out and they invariably bring results to our lives that we might not want. If we continue to use these character defects, we will continue to have undesirable results in our lives. How do we change ourselves or get rid of a character defects. We can go to the heart and ask a question, make a decision, then honor the heart. For example, say I get angry today. I would go to the heart and ask, would I rather be right or would I rather be happy? How we answer this question can have an enormous impact on how our day goes. Once we decide the answer to this question, we need to honor the heart by saying, “Thank you for the power of changing my thoughts. I choose to be happy and to experience peace of mind.”

Great Spirit, today, let me teach only love and learn only love.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

You can always make room in a tight schedule for a loved one. Perhaps stress pushes you to keep on track with all the tasks you need to complete, but the heart has its own agenda as well that you can’t pencil into your calendar. A partner or beloved friend might not loudly announce that they need you, but it’s undeniable when they do. Offer them the gift of your presence now, not excuses, and you will both be happier for your effort. Author Charles Buxton said, “You will never find time for anything. If you want time, you must make it.”

Daily Recovery Readings
January 21, 2020

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Daily Reflection

SERVING MY BROTHER

The member talks to the newcomer not in a spirit of power but in a spirit of humility and weakness.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE, p. 279

As the days pass in A.A., I ask God to guide my thoughts and the words that I speak. In this labor of continuous participation in the Fellowship, I have numerous opportunities to speak. So I frequently ask God to help me watch over my thoughts and my words, that they may be the true and proper reflections of our program; to focus my aspirations once again to seek His guidance; to help me be truly kind and loving, helpful and healing, yet always filled with humility, and free from any trace of arrogance.

Today I may very well have to deal with disagreeable attitudes or utterances-the typical stock-in-trade attitude of the still-suffering alcoholic. If this should happen, I will take a moment to center myself in God, so that I will be able to respond from a perspective of composure, strength and sensibility.

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Big Book Quote

“In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 86

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

To grasp the A.A. program, we have to think things out. Saint Paul said, “They are transformed by the renewing of their minds.” We have to learn to think straight. We have to change from alcoholic thinking to sober thinking. We must build up a new way of looking at things. Before we came into A.A., we wanted an artificial life of excitement and everything that goes with drinking. That kind of a life looked normal to us then. But as we look back now, that life looks the exact opposite of normal. In fact, it looks most abnormal. We must reeducate our minds. Am I changing from an abnormal thinker to a normal thinker?

Meditation for the Day

I will take the most crowded day without fear. I believe that God is with me and controlling all. I will let confidence be the motif running through all the crowded day. I will not get worried, because I know that God is my helper. Underneath are the everlasting arms. I will rest in them, even though the day is full of things crowding in upon me.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be calm and let nothing upset me. I pray that I may not let material things control me and choke out spiritual things.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Wants and Needs

Part of taking responsibility for us means taking responsibility for what we want and need, and knowing that’s okay to do.

Learning to tune in to us, learning to listen to ourselves, is an art. It takes practice. We can use our ability to guess what others want and need and apply that skill to ourselves.

What does it sound like we might want and need? What would we guess would help us feel better? What are our feelings telling us? Our body? Our mind? Our intuition?

If we ask, then listen closely; we’ll hear the answer.

We are wiser than we think, and we can be trusted.

What we want and need counts. It’s important, and it’s valid. It’s okay to learn to participate in meeting our own needs.

We can learn to identify what we want and need and be patient with ourselves while we’re learning.

Today, I will pay attention to what I want and need. I will not discount myself.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

There are things for which an uncompromising stand is worthwhile.

—Dietrich Bonhoeffer

For many of us, a time came when we said, “I’m not going to live this way anymore!” This was a deep, internal decision for change, even though we didn’t know how it would come about. Somehow we had reached bottom, and we no longer debated about whose fault our problems were. We quit negotiating over what we would change and what we would not change. We were willing to put all our energy into finding a better life, no matter what it would require. That is the kind of inner readiness that finally made real change possible.

Such willingness to take an uncompromising stand and give ourselves totally to a worthwhile cause is a model for our lives. It’s the beginning of deep change. Many men and women have taken similar heroic stands for other causes, like world peace, compassion for the poor and hungry, human rights, and protection of the environment.

On this day, I will take a stand for what is worthwhile.

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Elder’s Meditation

“This is the time of awakening to the inner father and the inner mother. Without this we will receive no high initiation; instead we get initiated into darkness. That’s because any investigation or revolution without God leads, not to freedom, but to more slavery.”

–Willaru Huayta, QUECHAU NATION, PERU

Honor the Father and the Mother. Father stands for wisdom and Mother stands for feelings. Inside each of us is the Father and the Mother. If we do not honor both, we will not grow in balance. To honor both the Father and the Mother helps our masculine and feminine sides grow. The winter season is a good time to focus on this. This is our season of reflection. Honoring both sides allows us to see the Creator is both Father and Mother.

Great Spirit, Father Sky, Mother Earth, guide me today. Let me experience balance.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Honest communication is the best way out of an emotional entanglement. Luckily, you could have an opportunity to deepen a meaningful connection with a student or mentor today. Oddly enough, it might not matter which role you play. Professionalism is important for maintaining decorum. But this may be one of those days where boundaries soften, no matter what you do. Experience every relationship as if you’re on a spiritual path where you alternately educate, transform, and illuminate one another, regardless of your experience, skill, or age. Everyone is a teacher if you open your mind.

Daily Recovery Readings
January 20, 2020

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Daily Reflection

“WE PAUSE . . . AND ASK”

“As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action.”

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 87

Today I humbly ask my Higher Power for the grace to find the space between my impulse and my action; to let flow a cooling breeze when I would respond with heat; to interrupt fierceness with gentle peace; to accept the moment which allows judgment to become discernment; to defer to silence when my tongue would rush to attack or defend.

I promise to watch for every opportunity to turn toward my Higher Power for guidance. I know where this power is: it resides within me, as clear as a mountain brook, hidden in the hills—it is the unsuspected Inner Resource.

I thank my Higher Power for this world of light and truth I see when I allow it to direct my vision. I trust it today and hope it trusts me to make all effort to find the right thought or action today.

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Big Book Quote

“Step Eleven suggests prayer and meditation. We shouldn’t be shy on this matter of prayer. Better men than we are using it constantly.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 85

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

In A.A. we’re all through with lying, hangovers, remorse, and wasting money. When we were drinking, we were only half alive. Now that we’re trying to live decent, honest, unselfish lives, we’re really alive. Life has a new meaning for us, so that we can really enjoy it. We feel that we’re some use in the world. We’re on the right side of the fence, instead of on the wrong side. We can look the world in the face instead of hiding in alleys. We come into A.A. to get sober and if we stay long enough, we learn a new way of living. Am I convinced that no matter how much fun I got out of drinking, that life never was as good as the life I can build in A.A.?

Meditation for the Day

I want to be at one with the Divine Spirit of the universe. I will set my deepest affections on things spiritual, not on things material. As a man thinketh, so is he. So I will think of and desire that which will help, not hinder, my spiritual growth. I will try to be at one with God. No human aspiration can reach higher than this.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may think love, and love will surround me. I pray that I may think health, and health will come to me.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

New Beginnings

Resentments are the blocks that hold us back from loving others and ourselves. Resentments do not punish the other person; they punish us. They become barriers to feeling good and enjoying life. They prevent us from being in harmony with the world. Resentments are hardened chunks of anger. They loosen up and dissolve with forgiveness and letting go.

Letting go of resentments does not mean we allow the other person to do anything to us that he or she wants. It means we accept what happened in the past, and we set boundaries for the future. We can let go of resentments and still have boundaries.

We try to see the good in the person or the good that ultimately evolved from whatever incident we feel resentful about. We try to see our part.

Then we put the incident to rest.

Praying for those we resent helps. Asking God to take our resentments from us helps too.

What better way to begin a New Year than by cleaning the slate of the past, and entering this one free of resentments.

Higher Power, help me become ready to let go of my resentments. Bring any resentment that is hidden within me, and blocking me, to the surface. Show me what I need to do to take care of my self by letting go of resentments, and then help me do that.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

How good and how pleasant it is that brothers sit together.

—Psalm 133

Men are lonely and more vulnerable to addictions and codependency when they have no firm friendships with other men. Do we have one or two male friends who truly know us, know what really goes on in our lives, what we feel, and what our doubts are? If we do, these relationships are precious. We need to nourish them. If we do not, we need to find others who might become friends. We begin by taking small steps in the development of a friendship.

The joys of sharing with other men, finding humor in our mutual flaws, and joining in similar interests have no substitutes. Relationships develop when someone reaches out. It is easier for us to do this if we remember our friendship is a gift to someone else. We need friendships with both women and men in order to be whole. But understanding ourselves as men begins with closeness to other men.

I am grateful for precious friendships with men and women in my life. They help me grow. Today, can I strengthen my friendship with another man?

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Elder’s Meditation

“The most important thing now is to reveal the inner temple of the soul with right thinking and right activity.”

–Willaru Huayta, QUECHUA NATION, PERU

The key to growing a strong tree is to have a good system of roots and to feed the roots with good medicine. If we put poison in the root system, it will affect the tree, and it will become obvious to the rest of the forest what is being fed to the roots. This is also true of the human being. We need to feed our roots with right thinking. If our thinking is right, it will become obvious to the rest of the people. We don’t need to tell people about ourselves with our mouth because our actions always tell them.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

The spotlight seems to follow you around today. You can’t help but notice that you’re drawing people out of hiding who now look to you for relief from their individual uncertainties. Everyone is unique but some have simple requests like directions to a nearby place or an explanation of a complex set of instructions. Ironically, you tire of the mundane concerns; you want to discuss subjects that are on a deeper level of awareness and sensitivity. You’re less interested in coming up with quick answers than in using the questions to probe the depths of the unknown. Dr. Antonio de Nicholas wrote, “It’s the search that creates reality.”

Daily Recovery Readings
January 19, 2020

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Daily Reflection

ROUND-THE-CLOCK FAITH

Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish.

— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 16

The essence of my spirituality, and my sobriety, rests on a round-the-clock faith in a Higher Power. I need to remember and rely on the God of my understanding as I pursue all of my daily activities. How comforting for me is the concept that God works in and through people. As I pause in my day, do I recall specific concrete examples of God’s presence? Am I amazed and uplifted by the number of times this power is evident? I am overwhelmed with gratitude for my God’s presence in my life of recovery. Without this omnipotent force in my every activity, I would again fall into the depths of my disease—and death.

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Big Book Quote

“We think it no concern of ours what religious bodies our members identify themselves with as individuals. This should be an entirely personal affair which each one decides for himself in the light of past associations, or his present choice.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 2

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

On the foundation of sobriety, we can build a life of honesty, unselfishness, faith in God, and love of our fellow human beings. We’ll never fully reach these goals, but the adventure of building that kind of a life is so much better than the merry-go-round of our old drinking life that there’s no comparison. We come into A.A. to get sober, but if we stay long enough we learn a new way of living. We become honest with ourselves and with other people. We learn to think more about others and less about ourselves. And we learn to rely on the constant help of a Higher Power. Am I living the way of honesty, unselfishness, and faith?

Meditation for the Day

I believe that God had already seen my heart’s needs before I cried to Him, before I was conscious of those needs myself. I believe that God was already preparing the answer. God does not have to be petitioned with sighs and tears and much speaking before He reluctantly looses the desired help. He has already anticipated my every want and need. I will try to see this as His plans unfold in my life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may understand my real wants and needs. I pray that my understanding of those needs and wants may help to bring the answer to them.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Owning Our Power

There is one feeling we need to pay particular attention to in recovery: feeling victimized. We do not need to become comfortable with that feeling.

How do we feel when we’ve been victimized? Helpless. Rageful. Powerless. Frustrated.

Feeling victimized is dangerous. Often, it can prompt us into addictive or other compulsive behaviors.

In recovery, we’re learning to identify when we’re feeling victimized, when we are actually being victimized, and why we’re feeling victimized. We’re learning to own our power, to take care of ourselves, and to remove ourselves as victims.

Sometimes, owning our power means we realize we are victimizing ourselves – and others are not doing anything to hurt us. They are living their lives, as they have a right to, and we are feeling victimized because we’re attempting to control their process or we’re unreasonably expecting them to take care of us. We may feel victimized if we get stuck in a codependent belief such as: Other people make me feel…. Others hold the key to my happiness and destiny…. Or, I can’t be happy unless another behaves in a particular way, or a certain event takes place…

Other times, owning our power means we realize that we are being victimized by another’s behavior. Our boundaries are being invaded. In that case, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves to stop the victimization; we need to set boundaries.

Sometimes, a change of attitude is all that’s required. We are not victims.

We strive to have compassion for the person who victimized us but understand that compassion often comes later, after we’ve removed ourselves as victims in body, mind, and spirit. We also understand that too much compassion can put us right back into the victim slot. Too much pity for a person who is victimizing us may set up a situation where the person can victimize us again.

We try not to force consequences or crises upon another person, but we also do not rescue that person from logical consequences of his or her behavior. If there is a part that is our responsibility to play in delivering those consequences, we do our part – not to control or punish, but to be responsible for ourselves and to others.

We try to figure out what we may be doing that is causing us to feel victimized, or what part we are playing in the system, and we stop doing that too. We are powerless over others and their behavior, but we can own our power to remove ourselves as victims.

Today, I will take responsibility for myself and show it to others by not allowing myself to be victimized, I cannot control outcomes, but I can control my attitude toward being victimized. I am not a victim; I do not deserve to be victimized.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

Self-realization is not a matter of withdrawal from a corrupt world or narcissistic contemplation of oneself. An individual becomes a person by enjoying the world and contributing to it.

—Francine Klagsbrun

After we admitted our self-destructive patterns and gave them up, there were many days when we said, “Now what? Is that all there is? I need some answers. How should I live? How can I feel whole? How can I feel like a real person?” These questions may feel too painful to answer. These are among the first spiritual questions we encounter in recovery, and we must not hide or escape from them. They are valuable to us, and we need to follow their urgings.

We are asking these questions as if they were new and unique. But through the centuries many people have asked them too. They found answers we can learn from. They tell us to get engaged with life, take time for reflection, learn to enjoy it where we can, and try to make a contribution.

Today, I will listen to my questions and doubts as urgings from my Higher Power, pushing me to grow. I will be involved in living.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Heal yourself – your physical and spiritual bodies. Regenerate yourself with light, and then help those who have poverty of the soul. Return to the inner spirit, which we have abandoned while looking elsewhere for happiness.”

–Willaru Huayta, QUECHUA NATION, PERU

It is difficult to look inside ourselves, especially when we see conflict or confusion. During times of conflict we need to realize that we are talking to ourselves about our thoughts. This conversation is printing in our subconscious and forming our beliefs. During times of conflict we need to ask the spirit to control our self-talk. Only thorough finding that inner place and going there during troubled times will we ever find happiness.

Great Spirit, You are my peace and you dwell within me. Let me look for You within myself.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your creative potential yearns to break free of your self-imposed limits. A rather serious discussion proves quite useful now. You might have an informative talk with a coach or seasoned professional that helps you take your work to the next level. Naturally, if you’re flying solo, it’s simpler to carry out your duties and responsibilities with good cheer. Thankfully, you can strike the right note of respect and lightheartedness with a partner or friend when talking about your needs and expectations, especially if they are still unfulfilled. Nat Turner wrote, “Good communication is the bridge between confusion and clarity.”

Daily Recovery Readings
January 18, 2020

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Daily Reflection

Daily Reflection

WOULD A DRINK HELP?

“By going back in our own drinking histories, we could show that years before we realized it we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression.”

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 23

When I was still drinking, I couldn’t respond to any of life’s situations the way other, more healthy, people could. The smallest incident triggered a state of mind that believed I had to have a drink to numb my feelings. But the numbing did not improve the situation, so I sought further escape in the bottle. Today I must be aware of my alcoholism. I cannot afford to believe that I have gained control of my drinking — or again I will think I have gained control of my life. Such a feeling of control is fatal to my recovery.

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Big Book Quote

“We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: ‘Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.’ Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, More About Alcoholism, pg. 33

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

The new life can’t be built in a day. We have to take the program slowly, a little at a time. Our subconscious minds have to be reeducated. We have to learn to think differently. We have to get used to sober thinking instead of alcoholic thinking. Any one who tries it knows that the old alcoholic thinking is apt to come back on us when we least expect it. Building a new life is a slow process, but it can be done if we really follow the A.A. program. Am I building a new life on the foundation of sobriety?

Meditation for the Day

I will pray daily for faith, for it is God’s gift. On faith alone depends the answer to my prayers. God gives it to me in response to my prayers, because it is a necessary weapon for me to possess for the over coming of all adverse conditions and the accomplishment of all good in my life. Therefore, I will work at strengthening my faith.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may so think and live as to feed my faith in God. I pray that my faith may grow because with faith God’s power becomes available to me.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Gratitude

Sometimes in life, things happen too fast. We barely solve one problem when two new problems surface. We’re feeling great in the morning, but we’re submerged in misery by nightfall.

Every day we face interruptions, delays, changes, and challenges. We face personality conflicts and disappointments. Often when we’re feeling overwhelmed, we can’t see the lessons in these experiences.

One simple concept can get us through the most stressful of times. It’s called gratitude. We learn to say, thank you, for these problems and feelings. Thank you for the way things are. I don’t like this experience, but thank you anyway.

Force gratitude until it becomes habitual. Gratitude helps us stop trying to control outcomes. It is the key that unlocks positive energy in our life. It is the alchemy that turns problems into blessings, and the unexpected into gifts.

Today, I will be grateful. I will start the process of turning today’s pain into tomorrow’s joy.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“Communication leads to community – that is, to understanding, intimacy, and mutual valuing.”

—Rollo May

We have all thought, “If I tell the innermost things about myself, I will be rejected or put down.” Most real communication actually creates the opposite of what we fear. In this program, when we lowered our barriers and let our brothers and sisters know us better, they liked us more and our bonds became stronger. Are we concerned today about an intimate relationship? The way to deepen intimacy is to let ourselves be known. When talking about feelings, we need to emphasize those that make us feel most vulnerable.

The other side of communication is listening. In listening, our task is to hear without judgment and without trying to provide an answer or a cure for every pain. To express ourselves to others, to be fully understood, and to know we are understood will lift our hope and self esteem.

Today, I can make contact with people in my life by revealing my feelings to them and listening to what they are saying.

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Elder’s Meditation

“Silence is the absolute poise or balance of body, mind and spirit.”

–Charles A. Eastman (Ohiyesa), SANTEE SIOUX

Be still and know. All new learnings, all ideas about new things, creativity, daydreaming and mental effectiveness come to those who learn about silence. All warriors know about the power of silence. All Elders know about stillness. Be still and know God. Meditation is about the place of silence. This is the place to hear God’s voice. We can find tremendous amounts of knowledge in the place of silence. This is the sacred place of God.

Great Spirit, teach me the power of silence.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Sudden changes in your social life might catch you off guard today. You might try to gather friends and family alike for some frivolous follies and unforgettable photo opportunities. Undoubtedly, making wonderful memories with your favorite folks brings you great joy. You are passionate about those you love and you want them to know how much you care about their wellbeing. But don’t be disappointed if some of your chosen people aren’t available to play now. Rather than lamenting who is missing, connect with the willing and able. As is often the case, the only barrier to your current delight is your own set of expectations.

Daily Recovery Readings
January 17, 2020

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Daily Reflection

HAPPINESS COMES QUIETLY

“The trouble with us alcoholics was this: We demanded that the world give us happiness and peace of mind in just the particular order we wanted to get it-by the alcohol route. And we weren’t successful. But when we take time to find out some of the spiritual laws, and familiarize ourselves with them, and put them into practice, then we do get happiness and peace of mind. . . . There seem to be some rules that we have to follow, but happiness and peace of mind are always here, open and free to anyone.”

— DR. BOB AND THE GOOD OLDTIMERS, p. 308

The simplicity of the A.A. program teaches me that happiness isn’t something I can “demand.” It comes upon me quietly, while I serve others. In offering my hand to the newcomer or to someone who has relapsed, I find that my own sobriety has been recharged with indescribable gratitude and happiness.

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Big Book Quote

“It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, How It Works, pg. 66

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24 Hours a Day – The Little Black Book

Thought for the Day

It doesn’t do much good to come to meetings only once in a while and sit around, hoping to get something out of the pro gram. That’s all right at first, but it won’t help us very long. Sooner or later we have to get into action by coming to meetings regularly, by giving a personal witness of our experience with alcohol, and by trying to help other alcoholics. Building a new life takes all the energy that we used to spend on drinking. Am I spending at least as much time and effort on the new life that I’m trying to build in A.A.?

Meditation for the Day

With God’s help, I will build a protective screen around myself, which will keep out all evil thoughts. I will fashion it out of my attitude toward God and my attitude toward other people. When one worrying or impatient thought enters my mind, I will put it out at once. I know that love and trust are the solvents for the worry and frets of life. I will use them to form a protective screen around me.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that frets and impatience and worry may not corrode my protective screen against all evil thoughts. I pray that I may banish all these from my life.

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The Language of Letting Go – Codependency

Acting As If

The behavior we call “acting as if” can be a powerful recovery tool. Acting as if is a way to practice the positive. It’s a positive form of pretending. It’s a tool we use to get ourselves unstuck. It’s a tool we make a conscious decision to use.

Acting as if can be helpful when a feeling begins to control us. We make a conscious decision to act as if we feel fine and are going to be fine.

When a problem plagues us, acting as if can help us get unstuck. We act as if the problem will be or already is solved, so we can go on with our life.

Often, acting as if we are detached will set the stage for detachment to come in and take over.

There are many areas where acting as if – combined with our other recovery principles – will set the stage for the reality we desire. We can act as if we love ourselves, until we actually do begin to care for ourselves. We can act as if we have a right to say no, until we believe we do.

We don’t pretend we have enough money to cover a check. We don’t pretend an alcoholic is not drinking. We use acting as if as part of our recovery, to set the stage for our new behaviors. We force ourselves through positive recovery behaviors, disregarding our doubts and fears, until our feelings have time to catch up with reality.

Acting as if is a positive way to overcome fears, doubts, and low self-esteem. We do not have to lie; we do not have to be dishonest with ourselves. We open up to the positive possibilities of the future, instead of limiting the future by today’s feelings and circumstances.

Acting as if helps us get past shaky ground and into solid territory.

God, show me the areas where acting as if could help set the stage for the reality I desire. Guide me as I use this powerful recovery tool to help create a better life and healthier relationships.

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Touchstone – Men’s Meditation

“Wherever I found the living, there I found the will to power.”

—Friedrich Nietzsche

It has been said that addiction and codependency are problems of power. Recovery certainly calls us to admit the limits of our power. Yet, to reach for power seems to come from the deepest part of our nature. If this is so, can it be all bad? Men have used power in many ways for the good of all people. We have been defenders, protectors, and active community servants. At our best, we have taken strong stands for what was right.

We need not shun all power, but rather we learn to use it wisely. Our blindness to the limitations of power created great problems in our lives. Then we learned our first lessons about powerlessness. As humble men, we know we can be wrong, but we cannot be passive and still continue to grow.

I pray for guidance as I learn to assert my strength and power for the cause of well-being.

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Elder’s Meditation

“In our story of Creation, we talk about each one of us having our own path to travel, and our own gift to give and to share. You see, what we say is that the Creator gave us all special gifts; each one of us is special. And each one of us is a special gift to each other because we’ve got something to share.”

–John Peters (Slow Turtle), WAMPANOAG

We are all equally special. We need to focus on what is right for ourselves. As we focus on what is right for ourselves, we will start to see our special gifts. Then we can see how to share our special gifts with others. If we focus on what’s wrong with ourselves, we will not be able to see our gifts. Then we will think we have nothing to give others and we become selfish and withdrawn. The more we focus on our good, the more we see the good in others. The more we see the good in others, the more we see the gifts they have to share. What you sees is what you gets!

My Creator, today, let me use the gifts You have given me. Let me use them wisely.

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Daily Horoscope – Cancer

Your intuition is the peacemaker between the warring rational and irrational aspects of your psyche. You may lament that some people are being outrageous with their demands and the expression of their feelings today. However, you might be keeping your own desires and frustrations under wraps because you’re not entirely sure of what you want. Your yearnings pull you one way while your passions pull you another. Let your muted joy spring forth unencumbered to lead the way. President Abraham Lincoln said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”